Husband 50 gleason6 need advice from experienced people

User

Posted 20 Jul 2017 at 09:54

Hi im new to the community feel like i need advice from people experiencing p/c, my partner of 27years aged 50 had gleason 6diagnosis 6weeks ago after routine bloods at g.p,s psa came back 22 no symptoms fit healthy ex boxer, referel to hospital 4days later 22/5/17 performed random trus biopsy 10 samples taken 3 cores positive gleason6,we were pleased it was low grade, although shocked to be told we sort of came to terms with it,had mpmri and repeat psa 3/717, went for results of mri yesterday to be told theyve found another area for concern at the base of prostate and his psa has elavated to 28 which consultant says doesnt match up to his gleason6 biopsys theyve taken already, hes booked in for targeted biopsy 27/7/17 next week, were both positive people but all the not knowing and endless tests is awful he was hoping to go on active surveilance but now things are shady again feel like we were at the beginning in dark territoray maybe its the unknown im not sure but dont feel positive about things at the minute, my partner is very upfront and deals with things as they come a sort of what will be will be type of person, i think hes putting a brave face on for my benefit as he said he doesnt want this to impact on me he said i shouldnt be dealing with this at 47! and im doing the same for him ive told him were un it togethee whatever the outcome we.l deal with it, im so sad for him it breaks my heart but feel like i cant open up as he.l end up feeling bad because thinks im upset, this whole situation is crazy i just need help to put things a little into perspective..jo.x

User

Posted 20 Jul 2017 at 16:35

Hello Jo and welcome.

It's a b****r isn't it. All the waiting around just makes it all worse.

We've all been were you both are now and once you know where he stands it will get easier in a way because you can be more pro-active.

Was your partner checked for infection at all (just to rule that out with a low PSA that changed)

I know it is a shock and the first thought that pops into your head when you hear the dreaded word cancer is that it's the end of everything.

It may well be the end of life as you currently know it but life you will have, albeit a little different - depending on what the results are.

He MAY be looking at an operation and the possible side effects, he may be fortunate enough to be able to go on active surveillance for a while. Whatever the outcome, you still have each other and you should make sure that you talk about it all.

Bottling up your feelings can lead to misunderstandings and you don't need that on top of thew worry of Prostate cancer.

He might be the patient but you are in it together and will be supporting each other all the way through.

Lovely and thoughtful of your partner to say he doesn't want it to impact on you, but as a partner, it will. All us wives and partners do our best to support our other halves and it helps if you can discuss all aspects of your fears.

Please let us know how he gets on and if we can help with any queries then you only have to ask. No subject is taboo if you really need an answer.

If you are shy of asking a question publicly and you see a member who has information then click on their avatar and message them direct.

Good luck and best wishes

Sandra

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails

User

Posted 20 Jul 2017 at 19:48

Hi Jo - just to let you know if your partner is fit and healthy and been diagnosed while the cancer is still contained in the prostate then the outlook is very good. You will probably have to go through the "shall I have the radiotherapy or surgery" runarround but once youve made your mind up both routes have very favourable outcomes. I am 59 with absolutely no symptoms, very fit and healthy - PSA 28, biopsy 6 out of 10 possitive, gleason 4+3 and I am currently going through hormone therapy prior to radiotherpy. At every stage in my journey so far the anticipation and worry has been worse than the reality. Dont focus on the negative stories you will read - everyone is different.

So far Ive had no side effects from hormone therapy - I eat normally and exercise regularly and have a good sex life. Im sure when the radiotherapy kicks in I will get some side effects but my advice would be dont always think the worst - think the best and the best is that they've found the cancer while its still contained.

I used to say Damn why did I have that PSA check but when I started my treatment I wrote this on facebook......

In males in the UK, prostate cancer is the most common cancer.
1 in 8 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer during their lifetime.
I am 1 in 8
I feel odd saying this on Facebook - but if I can help save one person’s life by encouraging them to have a blood test to check their PSA level then I have to post this.

Here are the simple figures if they detect cancer early while it’s still contained in the prostate ;
• The 5-year relative survival rate is 99%
• The 10-year relative survival rate is 98%
• The 15-year relative survival rate is 96%
Amazing figures !!

Once its escaped the prostate the 5 year survival rate is 29%
Holy s*** !!!

I had no symptoms whatsoever and I felt fitter than at any time since my twenties but by getting a routine PSA check they flagged it up - there it was, hiding, waiting to break out but luckily for me still contained.
Even with a positive biopsy I was trying to wriggle out of treatment - we men worry so much about our ***** and the internet makes it so easy for us to support our denial by focusing on negative stories rather than positive ones.

So here’s a public attempt to make a positive one.
Tomorrow I start treatment with very good prognosis - yes I will have side effects - possibly severe - possibly not - but if I had not had that simple blood test there is a very good chance cancer would have spread without me knowing and it would have been too late for any meaningful treatment at all. Now because of a simple blood test at my GP's those amazing survival rates above are mine.

If you are male and 50 or above - please consider having a PSA test - it could save your life.

Good Luck

Edited by moderator 20 Jul 2017 at 22:41 | Reason: Not specified

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