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Working post diagnosis

User
Posted 08 January 2018 17:58:24(UTC)
I’m interested to hear peoples experiences on working post diagnosis/ treatment. I was diagnosed with incurable PCa back in May and started hormone therapy immediately and went on Abiraterone as well (instead of chemo). I’ve really struggled with the side effects, particularly fatigue but, in any event, I didn’t want to be on my death bed in X years time and think back and say “wow you worked really hard in the years before you died”.

I’m an accountant with my own firm and I’m co-owner but I’m also only 60 and wasn’t planning to retire until 64 or 65. However I have cut my hours down and pick my 4 year old Grandson up from school 3 days a week and intend to cut down further from Feb. Having said that I still work way more than the 26 hours I’m supposed to do!

Anyway, today I got a note from my business Partner expressing concerns that my illness and the way I deal with at work (open, Frank and honest) was having such a negative impact on the practice that I should look to retire ASAP, either that or buy him out!

I’m not sure he quite meant it the way it came across but I can’t afford not to work and, if I don’t work I’ll just sit at home and mope about the future.

I’m interested in what other folk living with this horrible disease did about work, business, life balance etc. Did anyone carry on banging out silly hours at work or did the bulk of us do something similar to what I did?
User
Posted 09 January 2018 09:05:19(UTC)

Tony,

If you look at my profile you will see where I am on this journey.

I still work, mainly for the mental stimulus that it gives me and the boost it gives me to be working with fitter people who do not give me time to dwell on my issues.

Sure my hours have changed and I am in the fortunate position of being able to pick my hours to suit me, so if I am tired I don't go in or work from home, but on other days I do. I tend to work 3 days a week, but it is up to me. I work in London, but always drive in to work which helps me and with my disabled parking permit i have no trouble parking or traversing the conjestion charge which is free for a disabled driver.

As a comparison to your line of work, i work for a large multi national construction company and their attitude to my situation is brilliant and could not be further from your own experience.

Keep going Tony and don't let others get you down or divert you from your path.

Regards

Dave


"Incurable cancer does not mean it is untreatable and does not mean it is terminal either"
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User
Posted 09 January 2018 09:54:25(UTC)

Hi Tonyc my husband still works 5 days a week (used to be 6/7) he's unfortunately in the incurable camp and had early chemo which luckily he worked through ,and now on the stampede trial arm j ,his job is a very physical job constructing marinas up and down the country and worldwide ,since his treatment has started 2 years ago although yes he still works his firm have been fantastic and has slowed right down mainly doing all the supervising and paper work in the wheel house of his barge .He will still muck in with the others when needed but on those days it completely wipes him out and weekends are normally spent resting.
We still have a Morgage to pay so Gary says he will work on for as long as possible to finish that if he can but also it takes his mind off sitting around thinking .I personally would like him to cut his hours down more to spend with me and our grandchildren,but he's a strong willed man!
Maybe you need to have a frank conversation with you partner , are you a liability at work or just slower ? Or maybe they can't handle the fact that you have Pca, Can you do shorter days rather then less days .
I hope you can resolve it and not feel pushed out before you are ready .
Good luck and best wishes
Debby

User
Posted 09 January 2018 12:58:24(UTC)
Thanks Dave and Debby.

Debby, that must be so tough doing a physical job as well but I’m pleased that both employers have been understanding. I think my main issue is that I’ve gone down from 50 hours to 26 (although never done less than 32) and that’s out pressure on the firm. However I have no intention of being on my death bed in x years time and looking back thinking wow you worked really hard for x years.

I intend to carry on working as it keeps my mind occupied like yours does Dave but I have no intention of working all the hours God sends.

Interestingly my clients produce the biggest % of the firms income. Easily overlooked eh!
User
Posted 09 January 2018 14:19:36(UTC)

I quite agree with you as getting a working life balance and having no regrets but unfortunately as more and more younger men are diagnosed it's harder as they often still have young family's to support and if like us 2nd marriages which also brings in double the amount of children ! Luckily ours (4) are all over 25 but now it's the cost of grandchildren ,but saying that they are a joy to have .
Best wishes
Debby

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