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Dad diagnosed- devastated

User
Posted 08 Jun 2018 at 21:57

Hello there. 

My dad has been diagnosed with prostate cancer after having a psa of 180. We are all devastated. I have done nothing but read and read about prostate cancer for the past week and had prepared for the worst once I had found out his psa level.

He has since had an MRI to see whether the cancer had spread anywhere else and the results were not clear. The urologist saw "shadows" in the scan but couldn't say for certain whether the cancer had spread because his blood results (separate ones) suggest that it hasn't gone to the bone....? We waited all week for those scan results and still none the wiser. But with a psa of 180 it's pretty likely to have spread right? His DRE was noted as very enlarged and "firm".

My dad has been put on tablets and then in two weeks time will have a biopsy and then an injection (hormone boost??) then bone scan to check for any bone metastasis.

The urologist mentioned that operation is not possible due to prostate size (but if it is contained, can this still not be an option?) and chemo to begin with. Is this normal protocol? 

Just so confused and upset and I feel heartbroken.

any advice welcome. Thank you for reading this far!

User
Posted 29 Jun 2018 at 09:37

Stop reading everything!😉

So far, all you know is that your dad has an increased PSA. It's not even high, certainly not high enough to assume it (if it exists) has spread.

Be patient, wait until the biopsies are complete, then the consultant will clearly tell you the state of play, and the options available to you.

He may just say "lets do nothing", and keep a watch on it. Or he might say "Have these pills and injections, they will stop it growing". Or he might say "you can have surgery or radiotherapy" etc etc. All of which should give you optimism.

There's only one certain thing about trying to predict the future (we all do it) is that you will be wrong.

Just be optimistic and supportive to your Dad, while his story unfolds.

I guess that when we first get a clue that the mischievous little cancer has chosen us, we all start thinking about making a will, how will my wife survive without me, or even .will I see another Xmas.

In reality, the vast majority of us survive for many years, living out our normal life span. I hate the saying (but it's true) many more men die with prostate cancer than because of it.

Stop imagining, and go and give your Dad a hug😀

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User
Posted 09 Jun 2018 at 15:56
Tes, we know nothing about your Dad's diagnosis, save the PSA. When the biopsy has been done you will be better informed. The injection is not a hormone boost! The reverse. The idea is to shrink the prostate so far as possible before other treatment begins. This is done by taking out the testosterone on which the PCa feeds. A big prostate means that it would be very difficult to cleanly separate the prostate from adjacent organs.

Now, you must relax and look forward with hope rather than fearing the worst. You will soon be better informed and quite possibly learn that your Dad has years of fulfilling life ahead of him. For example, nearly eleven years ago, I was diagnosed with a Gleason 9 PCa and pretty high PSA (in the 60s). At nearly 75, I'm not done yet, by a long chalk. My advice, wait until you have all the facts then plan for the future. Meantime, try not to scare yourself with worst case scenarios courtesy of Dr Google.

Good Luck

AC

User
Posted 09 Jun 2018 at 18:53

Hello AC,

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. And thank you for sharing your story- that is amazing! 11 years is excellent and I wish you continued success on your journey.

Just a very scary time for us and just can't see the wood through the trees at the moment. I just thought we would have known more from the MRI but that didn't seem to inform us much extra. I understand that psa is just a fraction of the whole picture but it's still a scary number.

is chemo often offered first or is that for advanced prostate cancers? 

Will hope for the best with the next tests and results and pray his treatment path is successful. 

So much to take in.

tes

User
Posted 25 Jun 2018 at 15:22

Hello tes

my name is pat and  my lovely husband Alan was diagnosed with prostate cancer about 10 weeks ago.   His PSA level was 18 and the consultant was concerned. so a biopsy was done to find one very small shadows in the lower right region of his prostate with cancer cells .  Like you we had all the feelings of panic fear  despare and of course we were scared but after the initial diagnose we sat down and spoke to each other and came to the conclusion that we can’t change things . We decided we could deal with things And After joining prostate cancer UK we found so much support and we began to take one day at a time and enjoy that day  to the full .  My husband is only 57 still full of life still full of wanting life and we have found that prostate cancer is so  positively dealt with by the professionals. my husband has now had a second biopsy and no more cancer was found so he will now be monitored. The reason I wanted to tell you our little story is just to say it’s ok to be scared as we all were in the beginning and it’s also normal to be totally confused but this forum helps amazingly and puts you in the picture quicker than u think. There is sooo much to take in and sometimes peoples answers are not necessarily what you want to hear or they may not be relavent to ur dad but you will be that strength for your dads journey... so keep going and if in doubt ask questions And chat. People are amazingly kind at these times and that’s a strength we all need. Keep us posted and remember ... enjoy each day ... regards pat 

User
Posted 28 Jun 2018 at 21:43

Hi Tes, I’m a 60 year old who was diagnosed four weeks ago with prostate cancer scoring 9 on the Gleason scale. My PSA score was 26, rising to 30 at last check. Like you, my wife and I feared the worst, didn’t know how fast things progress, what to do and the old question “how long do I have”?

I had an mri scan, followed by a biopsy, which confirmed the worst. I have been on hormone treatment for four weeks, initially a tablet a day, then after two weeks an injection which lasts six months.

I do get hot flushes, much to the amusement of my wife, have put on a bit of weight and a tightness sometimes in the tummy.

i had a bone scan and got result today that was normal.

Consultant also said cancer was contained within prostate, which was best result we could have hoped for really.

I am programmed in to start radiotherapy in October.

Try not to think the worst, the doctors are professional and just because it’s the C word, it’s not necessarilly a death sentence, which was my initial thought.

my best wishes to you and your dad 

Ady Knight

User
Posted 29 Jun 2018 at 09:37

Stop reading everything!😉

So far, all you know is that your dad has an increased PSA. It's not even high, certainly not high enough to assume it (if it exists) has spread.

Be patient, wait until the biopsies are complete, then the consultant will clearly tell you the state of play, and the options available to you.

He may just say "lets do nothing", and keep a watch on it. Or he might say "Have these pills and injections, they will stop it growing". Or he might say "you can have surgery or radiotherapy" etc etc. All of which should give you optimism.

There's only one certain thing about trying to predict the future (we all do it) is that you will be wrong.

Just be optimistic and supportive to your Dad, while his story unfolds.

I guess that when we first get a clue that the mischievous little cancer has chosen us, we all start thinking about making a will, how will my wife survive without me, or even .will I see another Xmas.

In reality, the vast majority of us survive for many years, living out our normal life span. I hate the saying (but it's true) many more men die with prostate cancer than because of it.

Stop imagining, and go and give your Dad a hug😀

User
Posted 13 Jul 2018 at 14:39

Hi, I was diagnosed five years ago. Gleason of 9 (you will find out your fathers Gleason after the biopsy) and high PSA. I was told by urology that it was aggressive and an operation was not possible and that they can only do palliative care. Then I saw the Oncologists. Amazingly positive people.

They had already booked me an operation and set me up for hormone treatment, along with all the tests. I just had to say I was prepared to go ahead with it.

So, I started hormones, then a month or so later had a radical robotic operation to remove prostate and nerves. They had to also remove a lot of lymph nodes too. Then three months later had 37 sessions of radiotherapy.

The operation was fine, and recovery was about 6 weeks. The hormones I had for two years, but had terrible 'manopause' we called it. Basically, PMT for men for two years. The radio therapy, while making me tired, was ok too.

The long and the short of this is I am now 2 years and 7 months in remission.

Listen to Oncology, make sure you fully understand EVERYTHING they are telling you. If you do not understand something, ASK! They will elaborate. Also, ask to speak with the Urology nurse team. They are a mind of information. They also have great ideas about getting through it, as they deal with these issues every day.

Take care, and good luck for your father.

 
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