I am glad you have started a new thread Steve, a lot of the old one was in the past and brings back too many horrible memories for you.
Don't feel you have to bottle everything up though, I'm sure that wouldn't help
Positivity is good, but we'll understand that there are days / will be days when Mr Positivity ain't playing.
You know what we're like and you know that if there was a real, physical, way that any of us could help you on this journey we would do it like a shot.
All we can do however is the usual listening ear and shoulder to lean on until you have the strength of mind and purpose to stand upright again.
Why (If it's not too personal) has today been a "difficult day that could shape your whole future".
I thought the dropping ~PSA was good. Is it you heart?
You try and keep that chin up as high as you can Steve
Sandra
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Steve, whilst it's good to read that you feel different about stuff now it is also important that you share any feelings you want. If you don't think they are for general consumption then feel free to PM me or anyone else you feel may have a good ear or can help.
Stay strong buddy
Kev
Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019 |
User
Hi Steve
Good to see you posting again. Don't be afraid to post what you want to post, this forum is here for that reason, to support each other during our journeys, good or bad.
Roy
User
Steve,
Turn over that new leaf! And what a sunny day to do it!
Flexi
User
Hi Steve,
Are you going to head it up with a new title ?
Best Wish Barry
User
Hi Steve,
Just spotted A Fresh Start by S N
http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif
User
Hi Steve
I am sorry to hear you are struggling.
I'm afraid I can't help you much other than to give you encouragement.
When I ever get down and overwhelmed with things I revert back to "eating the elephant a bit at a time" and just force my self to not think but do - it does help. It's almost like going into another world.
As far as sleep goes I can relate to how you must feel, I wake up every 1.5 hrs with hot flushes throughout the night so try to have a nap during the day or just go for a walk.
I do hope you can get back on track
I'm thinking of you
Paul
User
hi steve
good morning, hope this new day brings some new thoughts that help, what helps me a lot is reading about everyones little problems they make me realise I am not alone as it can feel a very lonely place, take healeys comment re hot flushs, I have the same problem with night time hot flushs, am seeing dr on Thursday re issues with my treatment and going to ask if he can give me the tena pads on prescription, need them at night
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Hi Steve, sorry you are not great at the moment.
For me when I get like that I try and do something new to break the spiral however small it may be eg, walk somewhere different, go to a shop and treat myself to a sticky bun, take some pictures of happy things even just throw out some old clothes (give to charity anyway) or put on your favourite clothes, shoes etc that just bring in good memories.
Stay with it mate
Kev
Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019 |
User
Morning Steve
Sorry that you're not feeling your best at the moment. When "my Steve" was in a similar position to you he always felt better when ventured out, not necessarily too far, he'd walk a bit further to buy his newspaper and would stop for a coffee on the way home, nearly 5 years later he's still friendly with the owners of the cafe! He said the main thing for him would to get our of the house for a while.
If you think that the heart meds are not helping matters go back to your cardiac team as there are often alternatives available.
Wishing you well.
Maureen x
"You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think." A A Milne |
User
Hi Steve,
Sorry to hear you're feeling down. If I can be as bold to suggest, perhaps it's time to step back a bit and to come up with a list of "quick wins", things that are simple, are achieveable and build on from there?
Keep the faith!
Flexi
User
Hello Steve,
Sorry you are feeling down again.
Don't know what to suggest really, since if it is the meds causing it - well you need the meds don't you.
Thinking of you and hoping your life brightens up soon.
Best Wishes
Sandra
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Steve
Sorry to hear to are feeling low again - have you got someone you could go for 'a pie and a pint' with and have a good chat?
Arthur
User
Hi Steve
I cant really add to what the others have said ! It really really helps to drag yourself up and go do something / anything . I hope you find the strength
Chris
User
Hi Steve
Maim sorry I misunderstood and so am glad that you're not feeling low.
Tiredness can make you lethargic - as I well know. the best thing of course is just to is to get out and about which I see you have been doing down in the City.
The boats on the Thames must have been pretty good and I hope you got a photo of them with Theresa May in the foreground.
Your work must be a great therapy and the places you visit fascinating.
Keep your chin up and I'm sure you will be back running soon
Paul
User
Sorry you've been feeling down Steve. Sincerely hope it's just a "blip" and you're up and running again soon.
All The Very Best,
Cobbles
User
It will be an incentive to lay there and do as your told and not to fret yourself into staying in !!!
Hope you enjoy the little one's day, even if you aren't likely to enjoy yours!
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
I suspect the family would rather have you healthy even if that means it takes a few days for the new baby to meet his grandad - I am surprised that your daughter-in-law is happy to have you all visiting immediately anyway! Important that you have the treatment that will make you well again and allow you to get some joy out of life Steve - you have been sad for too long.
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
|
User
Hi Steve,
I haven't posted much recently a bit like you tiredness has overcome me I do think depression is soooooooooooo very tiring and when the chips are down I just want to pull the quilt over my head and hibernate. Unlucky for me I can't do that with children and dogs depending on me so the old saying "ONWARDS AND UPWARDS MY FRIEND" The only way is forward .
Sometimes I think what they do with horses is the right way, for some of us put those blinkers on and we can't look sideways, sideways isn't good keep going forward . You don't realise it but you have come such a long way . Forward keep going forward.
BFN
Julie x
NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON |
User
Dear Steve,
I feel like this some days too, but I have 2 little children and my OH to look after so are forced to keep busy. However I find that keeping busy really does help, and when I have less to do, on some days, I am then looking for more to do!
My Mum suffers from depression and she too must keep busy and feel needed.
We spoke previously about voluntary work? Do you feel up to that, even if it was helping an elderly neighbor with the garden or walking their dog. Something to give you a routine and get up for.
Hope you can find some motivation soon and feel less tired.
Alison
User
when I read what they do with horses, first thought was put a gun to my head, then I read about the blinkers
been the worst two weeks since I was diagnosed, all to do with the NHS post code lottery
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Steve,
Glad to hear you have some work, let's hope it will both continue and be manageable for you
Arthur
User
sounds like you are keeping really busy Steve, I think that this will help.
Stay safe with all that driving to do.
Best regards
Alison
User
Strewth Steve, all the (globe) trotting would be tiring.
Difficult one that isn't it. Take the work while it's there but be tired because of it.
You must be a good photographer though if the work is coming in.
Just try and make time for resting and relaxing - not easy I know
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Its really difficult for you isn't it Steve ? You want the money obviously but could do with a more balanced job where it doesn't all hit you at once . Keep trying , as I know I always feel better mentally when ive achieved something each day .
Take care and have a thorough relax when you get the chance after this week
Chris
User
Hi Steve really feeling for you in your situation , its a two edge sword being busy will take your mind off your other problems but you would be better having a bit less to find time to put your feet up but you need the income , hope it improves for you . Andy
User
Thinking of you Steve.
Just do the best you can. You are not superman. Is there nobody could help you with the photo processing as a favour?
You've been at the bottom of that hole before and it won't be any more interesting this time round either, so look around you, see what footholds (no matter how small) you can step into. Every little step, no matter how tiny, will eventually get you within sight of the rim.
It's easy for any of us to say "Do it", we aren't in your situation. You know we are all rooting for you.
PS Good job you couldn't come on Saturday. It would have given you even more work !!! (But I did appreciate the desire the be there, thank you)
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Steve
you often say that your wife feels left out of things and she doesn't work. maybe you could teach her some of the stuff you do once you get home so that she could actually help you a bit.
just a thought
Mo
User
I keep offering to help El with the dog-grooming !! I want her to train me up but she won't hear of it haha. I'm offended to the core. We are turning away SO many customers she is so busy / in demand.
Steve , people keep reminding me of the good day / bad day thing. It is so true isn't it. You will get through this fortnight and then find a spurt again.
Chris
User
Steve,
Although it doesn't seem it the work is keeping you busy and focused and of course the cash is another bonus , I too sometimes feel overwhelmed with work and not able to focus on Trevor but everything sometimes has a silver lining although at the time we don't see it that way. A bit like you I have to focus my attention elsewhere .
I think maybe the tiredness is making you feel that it is an uphill struggle and again I know this feeling, take heart that you have come so far from the place that you were in last year.
BFN
Julie X
NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON |
User
Hi,
Mo, thanks for the suggestion, but I think it would take so long to train her and in reality, editing and finalising the images is one of the most important parts of the process. I don't think I could ever be happy if I didn't do it myself. I will always do this even if it makes more work for myself.
Chris, I think I will feel better when I get some of my problems sorted (not health issues), it's making things very difficult. I hope for a better day soon.
Sandra, I'm certainly no superman, I'm a million miles away from that. I did write you a long reply, but then lost it before I could post it.
Andy, thanks. Hope things are going ok with you.
Seem to have a bit of a problem while I'm writing this. I had my latest Zoladex implant late this afternoon, four and a half hours ago and it's still bleeding now. I can't seem to stop it. It's quite painful too which I've never had before. I just hope it's been inserted properly.
I wonder if I ought to check it out at A&E but I don't really fancy the long wait. I would rather go to bed but I'm sure I would bleed all over the sheets which wouldn't be very popular with my wife.
I better sign off and sort it.
Julie, just seen your message, thanks for posting on my thread when you've had such a difficult day. I really appreciate it.
Steve x
Edited by member 22 Sep 2015 at 22:36
| Reason: Not specified
User
I refer you your comment "I feel that I am in a big hole and cannot get out".
There have been many times in my life when I have been in a similar hole - overwhelmed with all the pressures of work, family, home and just life itself. The hole is deep and it seems impossible to get out. Somehow i managed to get out myself using all the strength I had but sometimes the only way out is if someone else comes along and put's their hand in and lifts you out.
Is there someone Steve in your life that can give you that hand? Could that be your wife? Not necessarily in your business but taking some other burdens off of you? I do hope I have not offended you by suggesting that. I really just wanted to say from my own experience I know what it is like when it seems the whole world is against you.
It is easy for me to say, but please don't give up!
Wishing you al the very best and hoping things improve for you very soon.
User
Hope you got that bleeding stopped Steve.
If it is unusual for that to happen to you, then you really should get it checked out.
Are you on blood thinners for your heart. Could that be a contributory factor?
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
hi steve
wish I lived a bit closer then I may have been able to come along and just help out at your photo shoots, and prob show you how a proper camera works(canon)lol
seriously though difficult times for you and hard decisions all seem to be another part of our lives, just keep at it the best you ca its all we can ask of ourselves
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Hi Steve
You say that your bleeding is down to your heart meds and obviously I cannot comment on that point. As for Zoladex versus Prostap, after having two Zoladex injections years ago I changed to Prostap and I have continued with this over the years when I have been on HT.
The difference is that Zoladex is an implant pellet whereas the Prostap injection is very much the same as a “normal” injection. Prostap can be given in the arm, thigh or abdomen. I have always had mine in the arm without any reactions or problems.
I hope this is useful.
Alan
User
Prostap would certainly be a much easier option. I have had the injections for over three and a half years and never had any bleeding or other problems.
User
I've had Prostap injections since January 2013 and only have a little soreness in my arm for a couple of days after.
Arthur
User
Hi Steve
My Steve is also on Prostap and has had no problems, he was taken off of his anti platelets 12 months after his heart attack and has just continued with aspirin for the last 4 years.
Hopefully you will get your meds reduced when you have a cardiology review, he managed to lose 2 drugs from the original 8 :-)
All the best
Maureen
"You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think." A A Milne |
User
Prostap is a much better injection, no pain ,Iget mine in the armhttp://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif
Edited by member 24 Sep 2015 at 18:53
| Reason: Not specified
User
Hi Steve
I've been on Prostap since Jan 2015. My ink is in the stomach, no issues.
User
Hi Steve
Pleased to hear you are being more positive after all your difficulties.
Arthur
User
morning steve
give it a go mate it all helps
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Glad you're back to thinking of the wellbeing course.
Your wellbeing is also in your hands as well as that of the experts, who can only do so much for you.
Is it wise do you think to say you won't go in again next time an attack happens? Yes you might block a bed for a while and cost the NHS but
A) they aren't going to let you block a bed un-necessarily and
B) Did you not pay your National Insurance contribution. Isn't your situation what we all pay in for?
You're not just taking a chance with your heart, but also that your wife loses her much loved husband, your children their father and denying your grandchildren the chance to get to know you.
I know it's all a pain (no pun intended Steve) but you do nobody any favours, especially yourself, by refusing what is on offer to you.
Right lecture over, lunch is finished off I go. Chin up young man !!
Edited by member 08 Oct 2015 at 15:53
| Reason: Not specified
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi,
One year today since I began my radical radiotherapy. I was very nervous at the time that my entire future depended on the success of those four weeks of treatment.
My PSA at diagnosis in June of last year was 48.85. The results from my last PSA test was 0.040 so something's working right. I only have to wait until the end of next year to know if the radiotherapy was a success when I come off hormone treatment.
Of course, if I die as a result of another heart attack, it will really bu@@er up my cancer treatment plan. http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-wink.gif
Steve
Edited by member 14 Oct 2015 at 18:26
| Reason: Not specified
User
REJECT THAT THOUGHT STEVE!
User
Glad to see that the PSA is coming down Steve.
Fingers crossed for the end of year report
Yep, that would really poke the cancer in the eye wouldn't it. Of course it wouldn't do you much good long term eh!! so you'd better plan to avoid the attack http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-wink.gif
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Steve
That's a nicely low psa value. As you say it shows that something's working.
My last reading was in the same region, it does give you some satisfaction
My next blood test is 2 November so I hope mine stays in this region.
You must be looking forward to the chance of coming off HT end of next year, I wish you well.
I'm looking forward to your next good news post
Paul
Ps don't go dieing of a heart attack for goodness sake we need you here. 😎
User
Time to start moving things up onto shelves then! 😉
"You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think." A A Milne |
User
That's so special Steve - hope that has given you a lift
Arthur
User
Already! Why do they grow up so quickly!
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
|
User
one thing is for sure their will be plenty of great pics and videos
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Hi Steve
You've had such a hard time, but I hope you take the medical advice you are given. It may seem a hard way of putting it, but you can't earn any money when you pass over to the other side. Easy for me to say, but reading between the lines, the op could well give you much improved opportunities in the future. Could be a case of taking 2 steps back for many going forward.
Paul
Stay Calm And Carry On. |
User
hey up
a bloke at work had a by pass just has regular check ups now, found he had PCa from one of his checkup blood tests
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
My FIL had a bypass when he was 65 and lived until he was 90 with no other heart problems, it gave him a new lease of life and probably saved his life, as prior to the op he was a heavy smoker.
He was monitored with respect to his weight and took warfarin every day.
Since that operation 25 years ago, techniques and safety must have improved so much.
Seriously think about it Steve.
ATB
Alison
Edited by member 29 Oct 2015 at 12:41
| Reason: Not specified
User
Hi Steve, I had a Quadruple bypass in 2007 after having 2 heart attacks. I must admit I was terrified when I got the appointment to go into hospital, but here I am 8 years later with no heart problems. Not going to bull you it's hard work for a couple of weeks after operation but do the exercises and it is worth it. Can forget the heart problem after that and do what I do, concentrate on beating PCa.
Trevor
User
Hi,
Just noticed the date and realised it's one year ago today since I completed my radiotherapy.
Hopefully, in about a year's time, I might have an indication that it may have been successful (when my HT finishes). It's the longest I've ever had to wait for any results.
Steve
User
Good on you Steve.
It's always good to have an objective.
I'm sure your training will take your mind off things but take it easy.
I'm trying to get back into training (I'll probably aim for the Leeds half marathon in April/May)
I'm struggling to get fit again so have started with walk/hikes and have just completed 10.5 miles followed by a hot bath with Epsom salts to sooth my aching legs. I hope to do a 4-6 miler on Sunday. So what I'm saying is start slow.
I'm sure you will get some coaching hints from nidge and irun for your training.
I wish you the best in your training and look forward to reading how you're doing.
All the best Paul
User
to right healey re some tips
first one is stop taking the hot baths after a run, they make the blood flow to fast you should be taking cold/tepid baths these help
slow down the blood flow and help you heal recover better
steve nice and easy for a start you have 16 good weeks of training ahead, would suggest use the next few weeks getting your legs used to a bit more physical activity, try some cross training get out on a bike if you have one on some days, it is about getting a bit of time into your legs the mileage will come later
a good start would be doing a park run these are 5k runs free to enter you just need a bar code off their site
am here if you need me to help build a training plan
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Originally Posted by: Online Community Memberto right healey re some tips
first one is stop taking the hot baths after a run, they make the blood flow to fast you should be taking cold/tepid baths these help
slow down the blood flow and help you heal recover better
steve nice and easy for a start you have 16 good weeks of training ahead, would suggest use the next few weeks getting your legs used to a bit more physical activity, try some cross training get out on a bike if you have one on some days, it is about getting a bit of time into your legs the mileage will come later
a good start would be doing a park run these are 5k runs free to enter you just need a bar code off their site
am here if you need me to help build a training plan
nidge
Thanks also Nidge
I forgot you'd mentioned this before although the bath did stop the aches for me and was nice and relaxing but I must remember next time to go tepid for better results.
Cheers Paul
User
Hi Steve
Good to hear that you have a target to aim for. It's good to have a plan but listen to what your body tells you as you progress
All the best
Arthur
User
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Brilliant, Steve. Good to have something to aim for and glad you are more reassured about the heart procedures !
Fiona x
User
Steve,
That's a great challenge you've set yourself, good on ya! Inspirational!
Flexi
User
S
Good for you to get back on track, but do not put yourself under unnecessary pressure, and listen to your body.
Thanks Chris
User
a hot curry and an orgasm are the best combo
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
|
User
Hi,
Managed to get through my latest (and penultimate) Zoladex implant this morning with little of the prolonged bleeding I suffered last time. Had to see two GP's because the first said he wasn't sure if he could do it right. He obviously didn't want to do it wrong with it costing £235 per injection.
Steve
User
Well glad it went well for you Steve.
Playing Devil's advocate here a bit but maybe it was that the GP didn't want to cause you any more and un-necessary trauma rather than the cost involved.
Personally I'd err on the charitable side (but then it is leading up to Christmas !!)
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Happy Xmas Steve and happy birthday?
Hope you have a stress free and chilled time.
Kev
Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019 |
User
Steve
Have a good, happy but uneventful Xmas and New year.
Love Chris & Dawn
User
Happy Birthday Steve,
Best wishes to you and your family for Christmas
Arthur
User
Merry xmas Steve and many happy returns
Bri
User
Merry Christmas Steve
Luther
User
Many Happy Returns Steve and many more of them.
Merry Christmas too
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Happy Christmas birthday Steve x
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
|
User
happy birthday and a very merry Christmas by the sound of it
will raise a glass to you all at dinner
regards
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Birthday Boy !! Double whammy.
All the best Steve
Chris
User
Oh Steve. I did message you yesterday so I hope you got it. It didn't say your box was full but I bet it will be today!!
Please don't be frightened what to post. If this situation is as bad for you as it has been in the past then no wonder you feel there is nowhere to turn, especially as you seem to be discounting us.
Whatever happened in the past with your posts is now water under the bridge and you know where it was misunderstood.
What is important now is that you ask us for help. Even if it isn't physical you know how good we are (usually!!) with the old shoulder to lean on.
There are many on here that have benefited from your posts and by reading your history.
There must also be folk on here that you trust if you private message them and although I am trustworthy!! I am a woman so perhaps you would feel better talking to a man.
Please try it. I would hate for you to get into the state you were in last time. Please my friend - approach one of us.
You must know that talking helps a bit to put things in perspective
XX
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Steve,
you are not alone in saying something then regretting it or wishing you hadnt said it ! Have just come back from a competitive obedience dog match with my club. I hate the matches as mainly they do nothing to promote it as a sport where dogs and handlers are enjoying themselves. Found myself saying as much and worse to the league captain of the opposition ! It may be true but probably tactless of me to pipe up !! Oh well, would drive ourselves crazy comtemplating the things we should never have done or said. Whatever was done is past so post whatever you feel anyway ! Don't inadvertently isolate yourself !
Fiona. x
User
I know in an earlier post I suggested that Steve should open up to us as we could help and support him. I've been thinking about this and for me I'm going to let him come back to us when he's good and ready and in a better position to do so
Arthur
User
I don't know if anyone else has but I'm sure Steve would appreciate support so maybe a private message just to let him know he is in our thoughts. ?
As you say Arthur, he will come to us in his own good time but he is already feeling lonely he says so a bit of online support might help maybe. We don't need to pester him, just confirm we are aware of how he feels
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
This would really help him Johsan.
Alison
User
Hi Steve
You're doing the right thing visiting the GP quickly. Hope all goes well this afternoon and it's just a blip
Arthur
User
Steve
I have suffered retention lots of time, always head for the A&E ,retention is dangerous for your kidneys
all the best Barry
Bleeding could be because you are straining
User
Hi Steve,
Don't have any experience of your problem and it seems your GP can't explain it either. It's good that you are being referred to Urology for an appointment (and no doubt investigation) but I would follow your GP's advice and go to A&E in the meantime, if problem persists.
Barry |
User
Steve
When I had retention the GP I saw sent me straight to A&E, if it persists please take the advice of others and go to A&E yourself
Arthur
User
Hi Steve
Don't wait until you go into retention, get to A&E and get it sorted or do you have a contact at the hospital you can call?
Take care
Roy
User
If you don't get an urgent Urology appointment please go to A&E Steve and get it checked out.
Arthur
User
Steve
I had the joy of a camera up the penis yesterday, to be fair the doctor was brilliant quick squirt of gel and it was all over in 60 seconds and you get the bonus of watching it on screen.
All the best.
Thanks Chris
User
Hi Steve,
I have read a few of the threads from your post. I know I don't usually message people much, but I had to reply to this.
Please, please, please, keep talking about whatever you need to! Whatever has been said which made you think you have to be careful with what you say- take no notice. It would be a false world if we all went round pretending to be happy all the time. Life can be extremely tough, and we all have support from these groups, so please carry on!
Are you living on your own? DO you have friends or family around who can also listen?
Ali
'Sorrow looks back, worry looks around, but faith looks up' |
User
Hi Steve
Glad you were fast tracked and things are progressing. The thought of the camera is worse than the actual experience ( a bit like the thought of the biopsy) they will put a gel into the opening which should numb it and you will be able to follow the cameras progress as it makes its way into the bladder which takes your mind off what is happening, so don't worry you will be fine, you have come through far worse procedures.
Good Luck
Roy
User
Hi,
I feel so relieved, I've achieved what I was hoping for with the situation I've faced in the last few weeks.
I'd like to thank everyone who sent me a PM to offer their support at one of my lowest times and having patience with me as it was something I was not able to post openly on this site.
Thank you for sticking by me.
Steve
User
Like glue my good man, like glue.
Sounds like you may have resolved it. Best wishes to all of you. Start again eh?
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Great news Steve.
Hope you can concentrate upon getting yourself over this problem now and enjoying life a little more again.
Two lovely grandchildren to enjoy!
Alison
User
Good news Steve
Really pleased that the situation you were facing has been resolved
Arthur
User
Hi Steve , pleased to hear this. Hopefully now you can now concentrate on your health and wellbeing and can feel more optimistic about the future. Cheers Georgina
User
hi steve you can now focus and zoom in on what matters, picture the scene in a few months you will not need photoshop, the colours will be vivid, just keep your finger on the button lens cap off and enjoy the picture
this is about the time when the wife says 'nigel stop its getting on my nerves'
regards
nidge
ps
canon rules ok
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Have you gone "cold turkey" Steve?
Won't that be a bit drastic on your system, after all your body has been used to it for a while.
I can see why you'd want to leave them off if they were leaving you on another planet, I'm just concerned it may be a bit sudden.
Did you consult a doctor first.
Sorry, it's the mother hen bit in me. You know your own business best. Hope it works out for you
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Steve,
I am sure I will get told off for supporting you, but life is short, and we might as well do what we like, and enjoy ourselves.
I have loads of tablets I don't take, like statins (because they give me cramp), and several others.
Some days I suddenly think to myself, did I take my tablets this morning? or did I take those tablets last night?
To my way of thinking, if I can't tell whether I have taken my tablets or not, then they can't be having much of an impact, leastwise not in the short term.
The thing is, if you still have a stock of the tablets to hand, you can always take one if you feel the need.
Best of luck.
:)
Dave
User
It should tell you on the packaging about coming off the medication. As far as I am aware it's not a good idea to suddenly stop anti - depressants...but I think you already know that Steve.
Bri
User
Unfortunately, anti-d's don't work like that, you can't just take one when you feel the need. Anti-depressants work in a number of ways, they reduce anxiety but also affect the serotonin levels in the brain Take away the anti-anxiety component and you will get a resurgence of anxiety. Not medically trained, but been there, done that and still have the t-shirt (and wearing it!)
User
Sounds to me like you need to speak to / see a doctor. Either 111 or A&E.
All the best
Rosy
User
Steve
You do get in the wars don't you. The other day I said "onward and upward" not set backs.
As your consultant said things often look worse than they are. I did have had a small amount of pure blood and a clot coming out of my penis after one of my ops and it did look significantly different to colour of blood in urine in a catheter bag.
Take care and do not use all the pampers.
Thanks Chris
User
Hope everything goes ok Steve
Paul
User
Steve,
Every time things seem to be looking up for you you take a further blow. Hope latest problem(s) can be sorted soon.
Barry |
User
Hi,
Photograghing the Reading v Crystal Palace match this evening (live on BBC 1). Frozen.
Steve
User
Hi Chris,
Disappointed for the Reading fans but as you know, I'm a Nottinghamshire lad so my loyalty will always be to Forest.
Yes I hope things will be like your experiences next Friday but I have never had anything like that, not even a catheter, so I'll a bit apprehensive about it.
Steve
Edited by member 12 Mar 2016 at 09:35
| Reason: Not specified
User
Steve best luck tomorrow. My advice - ensure they wait the suggested time of 5 to 10 minutes from putting the anaesthetic gel lubricant in you , to then putting the camera in you. I would insist on this even if they are behind. A nurse holds your hand. Look at her , don't look at the device.
All the best
Chris
User
Chris
Think I am going to get a transfer your hospital. Interesting about the 5-10 minutes, mine was gel in followed immediately by the camera, but having said that still no discomfort at all.
Steve
You will be fine, a lot of us on here have done self cauterisation with catheters not much smaller than the camera and I recall one guy using catheters the same size as the camera.
Thanks Chris
User
Keeping calm is the secret to a cystoscopy and just relaxing. I know easier said than done but if you tense it is more difficult. My urologist was chatting to me whilst I thought he was preparing. He then said look at the camera its in your bladder, never felt a thing even across the sphincter muscle. The thought is definitely worse than the actual procedure. Good luck. sTeve.
User
Good luck Steve, don't forget to post the photos. (That's of you holding the Nurses hand 😎)
User
Always rooting for you Steve, not nice but hopefully over before you know it tomorrow, kev
Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019 |
User
As paul says the thought is worse that the procedure. I didn't feel a thing
God luck
Bri
User
Good news Steve!
Relax now and enjoy the weekend..http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-smile.gif
Best wishes
Luther
User
That is good news Steve.
Glad everything went ok for you.
Paul
User
Good news Steve. Glad it went well for you
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
User
Thanks for the goods news Stevehttp://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif
User
So all done Steve and good news that nothing sinister was found so a good outcome . I have to say guys and I promise I am not belittling or unsympathetic to a camera up your bits ( I nearly said it but I no the moderators are watching and Lyn has only just got her new lap top)😜 I don't want tea spilt.
Squeezing a 8lb baby out of your bits is way more difficult🤗 So a camera going in the opposite direction phew not a big deal. I do get it though the thought is enough to make your eyes water.
Seriously Steve I am glad that it is done and the outcome is good.
BFN
Julie X
NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON |
User
Hi Steve
You're right to bring this to our attention. It's the place where we try to help and support each other on the journey we're on. Unless you have very close friends you can share things with this place is a good safe place to open up and reveal what's in your heart and mind.
Hope you have a peaceful weekend with that problem now out of the way
Arthur
User
hi steve
good to read about the blood
your comment on our wives it must at times be really tough knowing that at sometime in the not too distant future we may not be around all we can do is spoil em as much possible
regards
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Good news Ste*e.
Too late Julie - Pepsi all over the key*oard and no C, V or B 😥
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
|
User
Have been away from the site for a while Steve but really pleased to have caught up with your good news .
Regards,
Cobbles
User
Hi,
Thank you everyone for you kind messages.
I had an amazing day today. It was the Prostate Cancer UK "Men United" Collection Day at the Reading v Cardiff match today and hopefully, we raised lots of money. It was the first time I'd been the collectors' team leader and was just hoping I'd do everything right. As it turned out, everything seemed to go really well. I would like to get involved again.
On the subject of getting involved, PCUK rang me this week to ask if I would use my skills as a photographer, to work at the Brighton Marathon and the London Marathon covering the charity's involvement in these events for them. I agree to work at the London Marathon and will probably help out at the Brighton Marathon too, though I want to have a think about that one.
I love running events, even if I'm not fit enough to compete at the moment. I'm disappointed that my Cardiac Consultant requested that I pull out of competing in the Reading Half Marathon in two weeks time and not running in any races until they have chance to give me a Cardiac MRI scan to check on recent problems. At least I can be there to photograph these races so have some involvement.
Continue to have a good weekend everyone.
Steve
Show Most Thanked Posts
User
Sounds like you are well and truly on that road to a town called Acceptance - and with that does come a more positive mindset.
Wishing you well brother.
Bazza
User
I am glad you have started a new thread Steve, a lot of the old one was in the past and brings back too many horrible memories for you.
Don't feel you have to bottle everything up though, I'm sure that wouldn't help
Positivity is good, but we'll understand that there are days / will be days when Mr Positivity ain't playing.
You know what we're like and you know that if there was a real, physical, way that any of us could help you on this journey we would do it like a shot.
All we can do however is the usual listening ear and shoulder to lean on until you have the strength of mind and purpose to stand upright again.
Why (If it's not too personal) has today been a "difficult day that could shape your whole future".
I thought the dropping ~PSA was good. Is it you heart?
You try and keep that chin up as high as you can Steve
Sandra
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Steve, whilst it's good to read that you feel different about stuff now it is also important that you share any feelings you want. If you don't think they are for general consumption then feel free to PM me or anyone else you feel may have a good ear or can help.
Stay strong buddy
Kev
Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019 |
User
Hi Steve
Good to see you posting again. Don't be afraid to post what you want to post, this forum is here for that reason, to support each other during our journeys, good or bad.
Roy
User
Steve,
Turn over that new leaf! And what a sunny day to do it!
Flexi
User
Hi Steve,
Are you going to head it up with a new title ?
Best Wish Barry
User
Hi Steve,
Just spotted A Fresh Start by S N
http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-cool.gif
User
Hi,
Feeling really tired, I feel worse than I ever have been before. Sleep doesn't seem to help me much. It's probably the newly increased heart meds are not helping on top of hormone therapy. Wish I could get some of my enthusiasm back.
I want to get back to some sort of normal life and post positive things but it's difficult. There are too many things that aren't working out and I don't seem to be doing anything about them.
Steve
User
Hi Steve
I am sorry to hear you are struggling.
I'm afraid I can't help you much other than to give you encouragement.
When I ever get down and overwhelmed with things I revert back to "eating the elephant a bit at a time" and just force my self to not think but do - it does help. It's almost like going into another world.
As far as sleep goes I can relate to how you must feel, I wake up every 1.5 hrs with hot flushes throughout the night so try to have a nap during the day or just go for a walk.
I do hope you can get back on track
I'm thinking of you
Paul
User
hi steve
good morning, hope this new day brings some new thoughts that help, what helps me a lot is reading about everyones little problems they make me realise I am not alone as it can feel a very lonely place, take healeys comment re hot flushs, I have the same problem with night time hot flushs, am seeing dr on Thursday re issues with my treatment and going to ask if he can give me the tena pads on prescription, need them at night
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Hi Steve, sorry you are not great at the moment.
For me when I get like that I try and do something new to break the spiral however small it may be eg, walk somewhere different, go to a shop and treat myself to a sticky bun, take some pictures of happy things even just throw out some old clothes (give to charity anyway) or put on your favourite clothes, shoes etc that just bring in good memories.
Stay with it mate
Kev
Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019 |
User
Morning Steve
Sorry that you're not feeling your best at the moment. When "my Steve" was in a similar position to you he always felt better when ventured out, not necessarily too far, he'd walk a bit further to buy his newspaper and would stop for a coffee on the way home, nearly 5 years later he's still friendly with the owners of the cafe! He said the main thing for him would to get our of the house for a while.
If you think that the heart meds are not helping matters go back to your cardiac team as there are often alternatives available.
Wishing you well.
Maureen x
"You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think." A A Milne |
User
Hi Steve,
Sorry to hear you're feeling down. If I can be as bold to suggest, perhaps it's time to step back a bit and to come up with a list of "quick wins", things that are simple, are achieveable and build on from there?
Keep the faith!
Flexi
User
Hello Steve,
Sorry you are feeling down again.
Don't know what to suggest really, since if it is the meds causing it - well you need the meds don't you.
Thinking of you and hoping your life brightens up soon.
Best Wishes
Sandra
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Steve
Sorry to hear to are feeling low again - have you got someone you could go for 'a pie and a pint' with and have a good chat?
Arthur
User
Hi Steve
I cant really add to what the others have said ! It really really helps to drag yourself up and go do something / anything . I hope you find the strength
Chris
User
Hi,
Thanks for your messages.
I think it's more a case that I feel so tired, wanting to sleep so much, rather than feeling low. Maybe the "happy pills" I take are working but I feel as if I don't care and can't be bothered about sorting things out. I have no energy to do the things I should be doing.
I haven't even been running for weeks. No energy.
Steve
User
Hi,
Just to say, my mailbox is no longer full.
Thanks.
Steve
User
Hi Steve
Maim sorry I misunderstood and so am glad that you're not feeling low.
Tiredness can make you lethargic - as I well know. the best thing of course is just to is to get out and about which I see you have been doing down in the City.
The boats on the Thames must have been pretty good and I hope you got a photo of them with Theresa May in the foreground.
Your work must be a great therapy and the places you visit fascinating.
Keep your chin up and I'm sure you will be back running soon
Paul
User
Sorry you've been feeling down Steve. Sincerely hope it's just a "blip" and you're up and running again soon.
All The Very Best,
Cobbles
User
Hi,
Just had my date come through for my Coronary Angiogram: November 2nd.
The day after my grandson's birthday party and the day before his actual birthday. Hope I don't end up staying in.
Steve
User
It will be an incentive to lay there and do as your told and not to fret yourself into staying in !!!
Hope you enjoy the little one's day, even if you aren't likely to enjoy yours!
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi,
Thanks, Sandra. The only fretting I'll be doing is if they decide to recommend me to have a Coronary Artery Bypass Operation (my consultant has suggested it may be the way forward for me).
It looks like the first week in November is going to be pretty busy in my family.
As I said in my last post, it's my grandson's first birthday party on the 1st., I'm in hospital for a Coronary Angiogram on the 2nd. and my grandson's actual birthday on the 3rd.
I've now just found out that my son's wife will give birth to our second grandchild during that week also, earlier than planned because of previous medical problems. It could be born on the same day as my other grandchild!
It could be frustrating because I'm not suppose to drive for a couple of days after my operation so I'm not sure I would be able to see the baby until later in the week. Oh well, so long as we have a healthy grandchild, everything else doesn't really matter.
Steve
User
I suspect the family would rather have you healthy even if that means it takes a few days for the new baby to meet his grandad - I am surprised that your daughter-in-law is happy to have you all visiting immediately anyway! Important that you have the treatment that will make you well again and allow you to get some joy out of life Steve - you have been sad for too long.
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
|
User
Hi Steve,
I haven't posted much recently a bit like you tiredness has overcome me I do think depression is soooooooooooo very tiring and when the chips are down I just want to pull the quilt over my head and hibernate. Unlucky for me I can't do that with children and dogs depending on me so the old saying "ONWARDS AND UPWARDS MY FRIEND" The only way is forward .
Sometimes I think what they do with horses is the right way, for some of us put those blinkers on and we can't look sideways, sideways isn't good keep going forward . You don't realise it but you have come such a long way . Forward keep going forward.
BFN
Julie x
NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON |
User
Dear Steve,
I feel like this some days too, but I have 2 little children and my OH to look after so are forced to keep busy. However I find that keeping busy really does help, and when I have less to do, on some days, I am then looking for more to do!
My Mum suffers from depression and she too must keep busy and feel needed.
We spoke previously about voluntary work? Do you feel up to that, even if it was helping an elderly neighbor with the garden or walking their dog. Something to give you a routine and get up for.
Hope you can find some motivation soon and feel less tired.
Alison
User
when I read what they do with horses, first thought was put a gun to my head, then I read about the blinkers
been the worst two weeks since I was diagnosed, all to do with the NHS post code lottery
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Hi,
Thanks so much for your kind messages.
The way I feel at the moment is summed up by something I've written before but still rings true:
"Sometimes I fly like an eagle,
and sometimes I'm deep in despair".
I suppose many of us feel the same way. It doesn't matter.
Working in Southampton at the moment, will post this evening, if I don't fall asleep.
Steve
User
Steve,
Glad to hear you have some work, let's hope it will both continue and be manageable for you
Arthur
User
Hi,
Feel as if I'm being overwhelmed by work at the moment. I know that this will change, probably this week, but I'm so tired I'm not sorting out more urgent things I should be dealing with.
Since midweek (I can't remember what I did on Monday and Tuesday), I worked in London on Wednesday, Bournemouth on Thursday, Southampton on Friday, plus last minute job covering Rugby World Cup pub crowds in Reading (I turned down a higher paid job in Anglesey, I just think it would have been too tiring), yesterday I worked in Merthyr Tidfil and today I'm working all day at the Royal Berkshire Show. I feel exhausted but I need to earn the money when I can.
I want to sleep.
Steve
User
sounds like you are keeping really busy Steve, I think that this will help.
Stay safe with all that driving to do.
Best regards
Alison
User
Strewth Steve, all the (globe) trotting would be tiring.
Difficult one that isn't it. Take the work while it's there but be tired because of it.
You must be a good photographer though if the work is coming in.
Just try and make time for resting and relaxing - not easy I know
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Its really difficult for you isn't it Steve ? You want the money obviously but could do with a more balanced job where it doesn't all hit you at once . Keep trying , as I know I always feel better mentally when ive achieved something each day .
Take care and have a thorough relax when you get the chance after this week
Chris
User
Hi Alison, Sandra & Chris,
Finding it impossible to rest when I have to meet deadlines.
Just finished my pictures, captioning etc., from the weekend (at 3.05am) and have to get up at 7.15am to begin some more photo processing from work I did on Friday. I sometimes I'm at the bottom of a deep hole that I can't climb out of.
Steve
Edited by member 21 Sep 2015 at 03:16
| Reason: Not specified
User
Hi Steve really feeling for you in your situation , its a two edge sword being busy will take your mind off your other problems but you would be better having a bit less to find time to put your feet up but you need the income , hope it improves for you . Andy
User
Thinking of you Steve.
Just do the best you can. You are not superman. Is there nobody could help you with the photo processing as a favour?
You've been at the bottom of that hole before and it won't be any more interesting this time round either, so look around you, see what footholds (no matter how small) you can step into. Every little step, no matter how tiny, will eventually get you within sight of the rim.
It's easy for any of us to say "Do it", we aren't in your situation. You know we are all rooting for you.
PS Good job you couldn't come on Saturday. It would have given you even more work !!! (But I did appreciate the desire the be there, thank you)
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Steve
you often say that your wife feels left out of things and she doesn't work. maybe you could teach her some of the stuff you do once you get home so that she could actually help you a bit.
just a thought
Mo
User
I keep offering to help El with the dog-grooming !! I want her to train me up but she won't hear of it haha. I'm offended to the core. We are turning away SO many customers she is so busy / in demand.
Steve , people keep reminding me of the good day / bad day thing. It is so true isn't it. You will get through this fortnight and then find a spurt again.
Chris
User
Steve,
Although it doesn't seem it the work is keeping you busy and focused and of course the cash is another bonus , I too sometimes feel overwhelmed with work and not able to focus on Trevor but everything sometimes has a silver lining although at the time we don't see it that way. A bit like you I have to focus my attention elsewhere .
I think maybe the tiredness is making you feel that it is an uphill struggle and again I know this feeling, take heart that you have come so far from the place that you were in last year.
BFN
Julie X
NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON |
User
Hi,
Mo, thanks for the suggestion, but I think it would take so long to train her and in reality, editing and finalising the images is one of the most important parts of the process. I don't think I could ever be happy if I didn't do it myself. I will always do this even if it makes more work for myself.
Chris, I think I will feel better when I get some of my problems sorted (not health issues), it's making things very difficult. I hope for a better day soon.
Sandra, I'm certainly no superman, I'm a million miles away from that. I did write you a long reply, but then lost it before I could post it.
Andy, thanks. Hope things are going ok with you.
Seem to have a bit of a problem while I'm writing this. I had my latest Zoladex implant late this afternoon, four and a half hours ago and it's still bleeding now. I can't seem to stop it. It's quite painful too which I've never had before. I just hope it's been inserted properly.
I wonder if I ought to check it out at A&E but I don't really fancy the long wait. I would rather go to bed but I'm sure I would bleed all over the sheets which wouldn't be very popular with my wife.
I better sign off and sort it.
Julie, just seen your message, thanks for posting on my thread when you've had such a difficult day. I really appreciate it.
Steve x
Edited by member 22 Sep 2015 at 22:36
| Reason: Not specified
User
I refer you your comment "I feel that I am in a big hole and cannot get out".
There have been many times in my life when I have been in a similar hole - overwhelmed with all the pressures of work, family, home and just life itself. The hole is deep and it seems impossible to get out. Somehow i managed to get out myself using all the strength I had but sometimes the only way out is if someone else comes along and put's their hand in and lifts you out.
Is there someone Steve in your life that can give you that hand? Could that be your wife? Not necessarily in your business but taking some other burdens off of you? I do hope I have not offended you by suggesting that. I really just wanted to say from my own experience I know what it is like when it seems the whole world is against you.
It is easy for me to say, but please don't give up!
Wishing you al the very best and hoping things improve for you very soon.
User
Hope you got that bleeding stopped Steve.
If it is unusual for that to happen to you, then you really should get it checked out.
Are you on blood thinners for your heart. Could that be a contributory factor?
We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails |
User
Hi Sandra,
Managed to stop the bleeding just after 11.30pm.
It's not unusual for me to have this problem wherever I bleed. I take an anti platelet tablet to help avoid another heart attack so I know what causes it. My only concern was the length of time it was going on last night.
Anyway, back to normal now.
Steve x
User
Steve,
If your Zoladex implant is causing the bleeding you have described why not ask your medial team if you can switch to Prostap injections.
Alan
User
Hi,
Thanks Alan, but I'm probably a hopeless case.
Once I start bleeding (from anywhere), I find it difficult to stop it. Two weeks ago I had a four hour nose bleed in spite of applying pressure to all the right places.
It's all down to the heart meds. After November's angiogram I may get taken off the anti platelet tables, which may help my situation.
Otherwise I'm quite happy with the Zoladex. Are Prostap injections given in a different place?
Steve
User
hi steve
wish I lived a bit closer then I may have been able to come along and just help out at your photo shoots, and prob show you how a proper camera works(canon)lol
seriously though difficult times for you and hard decisions all seem to be another part of our lives, just keep at it the best you ca its all we can ask of ourselves
nidge
run long and prosper
'pooh how do you spell love' 'piglet you dont spell love -you just feel it' |
User
Hi Steve
You say that your bleeding is down to your heart meds and obviously I cannot comment on that point. As for Zoladex versus Prostap, after having two Zoladex injections years ago I changed to Prostap and I have continued with this over the years when I have been on HT.
The difference is that Zoladex is an implant pellet whereas the Prostap injection is very much the same as a “normal” injection. Prostap can be given in the arm, thigh or abdomen. I have always had mine in the arm without any reactions or problems.
I hope this is useful.
Alan
User
Prostap would certainly be a much easier option. I have had the injections for over three and a half years and never had any bleeding or other problems.
User
I've had Prostap injections since January 2013 and only have a little soreness in my arm for a couple of days after.
Arthur