Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Tbh his sex drive is non existent he has back pain and other symptoms. It's very upsetting when you think it's you! That your partner doesn't find you attractive we had rows about it! I felt so rejected and hurt, but it's not about me it's about getting him through whatever it is we have to deal with and for him to be ok... We don't know what the outcome will be tomorrow I'm just hoping it's nothing serious... But am prepared I think if it is something serious.... Thanks everyone
It isn't that he doesn't find you attractive anymore Andylou. If he is worried sick, uncomfortable with back pain and the rest, then sex must be the last thing on his mind.
Fear and worrying whether you have cancer must have a dampening effect on the libido even if you are normally quite active in that respect.
I really do understand the hurt and feeling of rejection for you though, (been there and done that in the past !)
If he is a non communicator (except during a row - when he might well say he has no feelings for you or anything else) then you will also be thinking the worst about his love for you.
You say it isn't about you, and as far as the possible Prostate Cancer is concerned, of course it isn't - you can't understand what that feeling is like. None of us women can, in the same way that our men have to imagine our PMT, or childbirth pains but can't experience it for real.
It is, however, about you to a large extent because he is going to need all the support you can give him if it is confirmed that he has cancer.
Fingers crossed that today will offer a resolution. I hope so anyway.
Chin up, you'll be there for him, when he needs you.