What do I tell my kids?

User

Posted 13 Jul 2022 at 14:14

Latest is that we all caught Covid so I couldn’t go in on Monday for the op. Some debate about the permissible duration between Covid and a GA, plus the theatres are having a rejig with other resulting cancelled ops, so may not get a slot for another 5-7 weeks. Oh joy.

User

Posted 10 Oct 2022 at 09:20

A quick update. I eventually had surgery on 14th Sept. For the whole period before and after surgery my kids have been great. They’ve been concerned and helpful but I think because we have them the facts and the likelihood of a successful outcome, they haven’t been too worried.
My son told me that yesterday, when we were walking across the beach together after he’d been surfing for three hours, he totally forgot I’d had surgery. It shows how quickly you get a good level of fitness back (enough to at least look normal again) and how the kids soon treat it as normal.
I hope soon that we’ll be able to forget about it, at least until the first post op PSA test (and when the incontinence starts to behave itself).

User

Posted 15 Jan 2025 at 07:26

Nearly three years on from posting this, I’m pleased to say that my first post SRT PSA result was <0.01.
My kids seem to have weathered the storm relatively unscathed. My eldest is in her first year at uni and the boy is in GCSE year, lord help us 😂

We kept them informed of what was happening but tried to always put a positive spin on things, even when the RALP hadn’t worked and I needed more treatment.

All I can say is that they seem to have been very resilient and supportive, even though (or because?) as teenagers they are often wrapped up in their own worlds. It hasn’t been plain sailing by any means and we have had and continue to have ups and downs as they grow. But I’m so glad to have two wonderful children who have helped me through.

Good luck to others in the same boat.

User

Posted 15 Jan 2025 at 08:44

Hi Nick.

My four middle aged kids saw my diagnosis as a possible early chance of equity release. 😆

Joking apart, they were all very supportive. My biggest concern was keeping the cancer news away from my two grand kids, who were then 8 and 3 years old. They both adore me and the eight old would have been particularly upset. Last summer when I was swimming with them, they noticed my circular RARP scars across my belly and asked about them. I told them they were bullet holes from when I was in the Army. No wonder I'm their hero. 😂

Great news about your SRT PSA results. Long may they continue.👍

Edited by member 15 Jan 2025 at 08:46 | Reason: Typo

User

Posted 15 Jan 2025 at 20:26

Adrian,

You were lucky to have kids who were old enough to join in the black humour! Well done for not only keeping the news from your grandkids but also turning yourself into a war hero.

I read your history and very pleased to see that list of undetectables. As you say, long May they all continue.

Nick

User

Posted 01 Feb 2025 at 22:41

Good to hear it worked out so well. All the best to all here, and of course in particular those with more difficult diagnoses.

My husband has opted for RP, we don't know when yet.

Our kids are 19yo, 16yo, 13yo and 9yo.

So far we have only told the 19yo. My husband does not want to tell the others until it is really unavoidable. I find it difficult because I feel like kids do pick up on stress and I would rather be proactive.

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