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Today is the First Day of the Rest of my Life

User
Posted 28 Feb 2015 at 18:20
Hi,

I don't ever get chance to relax.

I was just celebrating Forest winning this afternoon when my sister rang me to tell me my mum has just been admitted into Bath hospital with breathing difficulties. She's in her mid 80's and hasn't been well recently. I'm really worried.

I'm going to visit her tomorrow but typical of the way my luck goes, the Bath Half Marathon takes place tomorrow so I'll have a nightmare journey to reach the hospital as there are a lot of road closures.

When is it going to end.

Steve

Edited by member 01 Mar 2015 at 00:39  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 28 Feb 2015 at 19:28

Steve

Firstly I do hope your mother is OK and gets the treatment she needs.

I don't wish to be hard here, but for your own health and well being, is it totally necessary you go? Can you wait till Monday, or even later tomorrow to arrive for evening visiting?

You must look after yourself first. Try not to worry. It isn't going to change anything. If you do go, is there someone to drive you? Can you get the train?

Please try and keep your stress levels down for your own sake!

Paul

Stay Calm And Carry On.
User
Posted 28 Feb 2015 at 22:22

Hi Paul,

I have to go tomorrow because it's the only day I have free until later in the week.

I have someone coming to try and sort out my central heating on Monday (I've had no heating for months).  On Tuesday, I have cardiac rehab and an echocardiogram appointment at hospital.  On Wednesday I have an important meeting with a client who I hope will give me work when I am fit enough to work..  So three days that are difficult to re-arrange.

I need to do this.

Steve

 

User
Posted 28 Feb 2015 at 23:23

Steve

I thoroughly understand. Just make sure you take care of #1!!!

Stay Calm And Carry On.
User
Posted 28 Feb 2015 at 23:34

Thanks Paul,

Steve

User
Posted 01 Mar 2015 at 15:39

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Hi Paul,

I have to go tomorrow because it's the only day I have free until later in the week.

I have someone coming to try and sort out my central heating on Monday (I've had no heating for months).  On Tuesday, I have cardiac rehab and an echocardiogram appointment at hospital.  On Wednesday I have an important meeting with a client who I hope will give me work when I am fit enough to work..  So three days that are difficult to re-arrange.

I need to do this.

Steve

 

 

What is wrong with the heating Steve?

 

dave

User
Posted 01 Mar 2015 at 20:07
Hi Dave,

I'll private message you.

Steve

User
Posted 01 Mar 2015 at 22:58

Hi,

Difficult day.  I managed to drive to Bath today to see my mum in hospital after my sister had rang me with the news last night. 

I couldn't believe how she was.  I saw her three weeks ago and couldn't believe it was the same person I saw today.  I'm shocked.  I wasn't expecting this.  I'm praying she will pull through but she looks so ill.  Why now?

Steve

 

 

User
Posted 01 Mar 2015 at 23:12

Steve

Glad you're back home safe and sound. I have never gone along with the theory that things happen for a reason, but there are times in our lives when everything is hunky dory, and times when you wonder what it's all about.

Your experiences in the last 9 months have virtually all been negative, and you'll be constantly wondering why. It's just the most unfortunate timing that so much negative has happened without anything to raise the spirits. I hope your mother pulls through, but whatever transpires, you must believe there will be a rainbow in the future to brighten your spirits.

How long that rainbow will take to show itself is the big unknown, but please believe there will be good experiences to be had, life is worth living, and there'll be things to smile and laugh about.

As I said yesterday, priority number one has to be to look after yourself.

Paul

Stay Calm And Carry On.
User
Posted 02 Mar 2015 at 10:38

Thanks Paul,

The rainbow can't arrive soon enough for me.

Steve

User
Posted 06 Mar 2015 at 12:45
Hi,

Sorry if my absence from the site has caused any concern. I don't really feel if I can post just at the moment. Things just get too much sometimes.

Steve

User
Posted 06 Mar 2015 at 16:21

Keep believing, Steve. Things must get better.  Id'd like to give you a man hug, but hope a virtual one will suffice!

Paul

Edited by member 06 Mar 2015 at 16:22  | Reason: Not specified

Stay Calm And Carry On.
User
Posted 06 Mar 2015 at 17:02
Hi Steve, sorry you are in a dark place, just remember there are loads of people here who really care about you, look forward to seeing you back to your old self again soon. If I can help you in any way pm me. Kev

Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019

User
Posted 06 Mar 2015 at 17:05

Hi Steve,

Sorry I cannot help with the heating issue, need to be Gas Safe registered these days.

Has anyone else been using your account or sign in details here these last few days? I know you have not posted a lot recently, but the site membership list shows that your log in and name etc has been logged on here every day. If this was not you, it may be worth reporting this to the admin team?

Hope things improve for you sooner rather than later. At least it is getting warmer now, thank goodness, spring may have finally sprung?

atb

dave

User
Posted 06 Mar 2015 at 17:45

Hello Steve.
http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-smile.gifHugshttp://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-smile.gif

Edited by member 06 Mar 2015 at 17:46  | Reason: Not specified

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 11 Mar 2015 at 18:59

Happy Birthday. Hope that at your 70s you will write another post, and at you 90s =) Good Luck

User
Posted 12 Mar 2015 at 20:27

Hi,

Really sorry for not posting much recently, it's been a difficult time for me.  I didn't feel as if I could post, even though I was visiting the site each day to make sure everyone was ok.

Earlier today, I re-read my "How Lucky We Are" thread, because there had been a couple of new messages and I realised that I was ignoring my own and others advice.  If ever I needed support, it's now.

I don't feel as if I've ever felt so low as I have in the last two weeks.  I'm just so fed up with everything going wrong in my life, there never seems to be any "light at the end of the tunnel".  I just want something nice to happen for a change.  I think I've had my share of bad luck.  My mum's illness is the final straw. 

I seem to be too tired to do anything and I don't care, I would rather sleep.  I mean to do things each day but then don't, I'm wasting so much time which I'm sure I'll regret one day.  It's causing tension at home, love and support which I've enjoyed since cancer diagnosis seems to be draining away now, perhaps I've been at home too long.  I will probably go back to work at the end of the month if my heart is fixed or not.  The money has run out now and it's impossible to survive on £113.70 per week when the phone is ringing all the time demanding money.  It's causing so much stress (which I'm supposed to avoid).  Sometimes I just want everything to end.  Selling the house may be the only solution but I would feel even more of a failure if I did that because I wouldn't be able to buy another.  I've fought so hard to try and survive the recession.

I think that's all I can post, I don't think the words are flowing as they normally do, just the reason I wasn't posting before.

Steve

 

Edited by member 12 Mar 2015 at 20:30  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 12 Mar 2015 at 22:37

OH Steve, 

I have seen you logged on and also noted that you hadn't posted and I had thought that you must be very low and your post has confirmed my thoughts. 

I hope you don't mind me saying but I think you are very depressed and need to see your GP about this, you have been through such a lot and with each blow it knocks you down further , we all need a helping hand back up the ladder and it is now time to ask for that help from your GP. Tiredness and a feeling of not being able to cope are classic signs. 

Your wife has also been going through this and sometimes things can get so emotional that we don't or can't give each other the support that is needed , we can all help you on the forum but sometimes extra medical help is needed.  I have been there and lost our home Steve and also faced huge hardship financially and emotionally and most importantly with Trevor's health , the main thing is that you know seek the help that you need . Life will get better because when you hit rock bottom the only way is up.

Go see your Dr and open up to him or her, you need that extra bit of help.

Thinking of you.

BFN

Julie X

 

NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON
User
Posted 12 Mar 2015 at 22:53

Steve

 

I am sure many of us are wondering just what to say, and in all honesty, there seems very little when you have arrived at such a low ebb.  You find yourself not fit for work, needing cash, and the stress is causing relationship difficulties at the time when you least need them.

 

Please seek all the local help you can.  GP, Citizen's Advice, extended family etc. (I am sure Steve would be grateful for other suggestions.) Pour out everything to them with your wife. Do not hold back, because being ill should not bring about such hardship.  There must be solutions that can begin to help with your worries.

 

Do not give in. Stay strong. Get plenty of rest, but use the energy you have left positively.  

 

Paul

 

 

Stay Calm And Carry On.
User
Posted 12 Mar 2015 at 23:08

Sorry to read this Steve,

I can only echo what has been said about seeing your GP asap. The symptoms and behaviour you are describing as going through are typical of, and can be an indicator of depression.

As for your fiancées, have you considered speaking with someone at your local CAB about getting help in sorting out your finances with regard to arranging repayment holidays or reducing some or all payments for a while?

GP has to be your first consideration.

atb

dave

 
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