Psychological effects

Louise, if there is any way of getting into the room with him, do it. I hope that the ED nurse will encourage you to be together for this appointment. What usually happens is that the nurse talks through exactly how to prepare the injection and expel air from the end of the needle and will then inject your OH to show him where to put it and how it feels. With a bit of luck, it will work immediately and may last long enough for you to get home and use it :-o

If it doesn't work, the ED nurse may still give you a prescription with instructions to try a higher dose at home (with a few days break first). The thing is, there is quite a lot to remember and OH may be so anxious about the fact someone is going to stick a needle in his old todger that he doesn't really take in all the practical stuff so you would be an invaluable extra pair of ears.

I have heard on here of men who got the instructions and prescription but weren't actually injected at the appointment. It seems to me to be a great shame as they tend to be the men who struggle to get the technique right.

You are right to be cautious - the injections don't work for everyone so if he is expecting this to be a panacea then his expectations need to be managed. It sounds like he is caught in that terrible cycle - he is so frightened of failing, he has already stopped doing the things that are most likely to help. I remember how that feels and could scream with frustration for you; have you ever given him my 'one wife's story' thread to read?

Hi Louise

If I may offer it, a little more support from me to echo the comments made by others and to offer some of my experiences this week.

I am twelve months on from my operation, I too should be a one pad a day man, but really only to catch the inadvertent drips after a cough or a sneeze or bending. I have to say that I really dislike the pads however and choose not to wear them and just make sure that I'm aware of where the nearest loo is, and am mindful of how much I drink. I am taking a drug called Solifenacin (5mg) twice a day for just about a week now, and it seems quite promising as the leaks do seem to have slowed in the last day or two and I also feel as though I have finally got some control over how often I need to use the loo. My Uro nurse seems to think the problem I was having was more of an over active bladder rather than a weak pelvic floor. I spend a reasonable amount of time exercising in one form or another so I always felt that my issue wasn't with the pf at all.

With regards to the ED, I too have been getting semi erections that only recently were naturally able to provide any penetration, however they really only last for seconds and are done essentially not allowing for successful penetrative sex. I too have used cialis, viagra and levitra but none of those drugs have ever helped to gain, or supported any natural erections. I had an appointment on Monday with the ED nurse at my local hospital and he has shown me how to use the injection in the very way that Lyn has described. I would have taken my wife but she would have passed out before we would have gotten through the door, so we did decided that I would go by myself. I was allowed to do the injection myself under supervision from the ED nurse so hopefully I'll remember what to do when I pick up my prescription. Unfortunately I didn't see any success with the first try, but to be fair I only injected the smallest 2.5mg dose. When I try next I shall go up to 5mg and see what happens.

We have been using the pump that I bought some time ago, and this does produce effective erections, but if I am being completely honest I really don't like to use it, I find it very uncomfortable and it doesn't do the job for me i terms of orgasms, although my wife tells me she is more than happy with the benefits that it offers her if you get my drift.

Do please let your other half know that all is not lost, that resigning oneself to never having what I would call proper and enjoyable sex again with the one I love very much as over, is defiantly not the case. I am 52 and not prepared to give up on all that I and my wife had over this little hiccup. It was bad enough being told that I had PC and having to have the operation and the baggage that went with it, I am determined not to let that wreck the rest of our lives together.

I do wish you both well and hope that todays appointment brings you renewed vigour to overcome some of life's challenges.

Trevor