Post-surgery fatigue

User

Posted 21 Nov 2015 at 22:32

My husband had a RRP 3.5 weeks ago, early days we know.

Apart from the inevitable continence challenges, the aspect he's finding most difficult to cope with is the overwhelming feelings of fatigue. He's keeping as active as possible, focussing activities on the morning to allow resting time after lunch, but he's struggling with the feelings of exhaustion, which don't seem to be easing at the moment.

This website has been a source of invaluable guidance on all the topics with which we've been confronted in the past few weeks, and so I wondered if there was anyone out there who has experienced the same feelings and could offer any tips on coming out the other side!

Best wishes to you all.

User

Posted 22 Nov 2015 at 01:23

Good lord! Does he understand that he has had major surgery? Of course he is feeling extreme fatigue - his body is taking every ounce of his strength and all the calories he consumes just to start healing. I hope that he is napping more than just in the afternoon - pushing himself too hard now may have the opposite effect and set his recovery back. Seems to me that the best thing you could do for him is stop him doing all these little jobs in the morning and make the poor man rest.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 22 Nov 2015 at 06:56

Hi Mrs Phatbuoy,

The many stages of his recovery may be adversely affected by his attitude and behaviour now.

He has undergone major surgery, even if just by robot or keyhole. Just because there are no major scars or visual evidence of this, it remains a fact. The internal scars and tissue damage around the operation site will all take time to heal. Trying to do too much now may hinder recovery or make his general health worse. If he is tired and tries too strenuous or risky a work activity, working at height for example, activity and fatigue take overcome him, he may hurt himself further.

What is "too much" can not be judged by what he used to be able to do. He is a different person for the time being, with apparently different, reduced capability, for the time being. For the time being he may have to accept this and come to terms with it? If he can realise and accept in his mind that for the time being he may need to do less, nap more, not try to behave as if nothing has happened, just for the time being, and instead of setting goals or trying to complete tasks, but rather, just do what he can and stop when his body says he needs to, then he will be in a better place physically and mentally. It is only for the time being. IE It is not permanent.

As well as the physical struggle, the head needs to come to terms with what he has gone through, accept it and live with it. Otherwise you and he may spend a lot of energy fighting that frustration, and that can make some folk even more down.

I had RRP, I tried to do to much initially, and it did me no good. The best thing I did after my op was realise and accept my new temporary limitations. My head and mindset improved. And my body was back to normal pretty quickly, and easily once I stopped pushing it too much.

Hope he can read this and it helps him, and you?

atb

dave

Edited to add: Did I make it clear that his fatigue will be temporary, only for the time being? That he cannot fight it, but should work within it? ;-)

Edited by member 22 Nov 2015 at 06:59 | Reason: Not specified

All we can do - is do all that we can.

So, do all you can to help yourself, then make the best of your time. :-)

I am the statistic.

User

Posted 22 Nov 2015 at 09:50

Hi there
I didn't necessarily suffer with fatigue after the operation , in fact I just wanted to get up and go. But TOTALLY agree with Country Boy and Lyn. PLEASE please take it easy and don't rush nor try to sit on a bike ( yes i'm that stupid and could have exacerbated ED recovery ), nor lift anything . Dave told me to be a patient patient . He's right !!
Chris

User

Posted 22 Nov 2015 at 12:59

Yep!

I agree with the others.....

The wounds may not look that significant on the outside....but major surgery has taken place on the inside, so your husband needs to appreciate that it's going to take some considerable time for his body to heal and recover.

There were times even after several months that I felt quite weak during the daytime and needed to have a snooze.

He needs to listen to his body and rest up when he feels the need.

So in answer to your question, I experienced similar feelings ( as I suspect most who have had a RRP do ) and although recovery time is unique to the individual it's quite normal to feel this way.

Best Wishes
Luther

User

Posted 22 Nov 2015 at 15:49

Thanks so much, everyone! Although we'd been well-prepared by the hospital professionals about many post-op aspects, this was one which hadn't been mentioned in advance, and so understandably he was left thinking 'is it just me?'. Your comments have brilliantly enforced the need for him to surrender control of life for a little while and just go with the flow (no pun intended!). His fatigue levels probably weren't helped by the fact we moved house a week before the op (ie he was already weary!) but at this stage it's easy to spot the rate of progress from one week to another and he seems to be doing well. It's difficult to get the balance right between sticking one's head in the sand and over-thinking the whole scenario. Hopefully, most of us are able to get the perspective right, most of the time! It's been a learning curve - indeed, a vertical one at times, but it's SO helpful to refer to this forum and everyone else's experience to find a sensible way through.

Best wishes to you all.

User

Posted 28 Nov 2015 at 20:00

My friend told me that you should expect extreme fatigue for one week for every hour you were under anaesthetic. My husband was under for eight hours, upside down. You would expect him then to be back running normally at eight weeks.

He started to emerge from extreme fatigue at about four months. It'll be 12 months next week. hes just about back on an even keel. He was a previously fit and physically active 57 year old.

Everyone is different. One thing you do learn is that there is no such thing as normal. Just normal for him.

User

Posted 29 Nov 2015 at 19:03

Louise
although it may not help with specific queries , your last statement echoes possibly the most important lesson that I have learnt from my cancer journey ,and it's probably a general life lesson that has only taken me 60 years to learn , that there is only one normal and that is one's own and that comparisons are not always helpful and can sometimes be quite counterproductive .

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