My dad - diagnosis had spread

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User

Posted 24 Nov 2015 at 19:01

Hi there,

This is my first post and first time ever doing anything like this, however my dad age 63 was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer in June, we were told the stage he was at that they could not cure it but could control it, he got 5 doses of radiotherapy and gets the hormone injection every 28 days, we were told the cancer is not cureable but can be controlable - since then my dad has took 2 mini stokes the end in October we finally got to meet the cancer specialist and he was extremely pleased with my dads progress the following week we went to see the bone specialist (cancer on bone) again he was really happy with my dad, at the end of October my dad was struggling to get from A to B with walking and always in pain until we took him to the hospital as his bowels hadn't moved in 2 weeks, after telling them about his pain in his leg we got bone scana done again to be told my dads cancer has now spread to his groin, he had to go for major surgery to get a pin put in from his hip to his knee as his bones are very brital Since then my dad has still not received any treatment for his cancer which has spread the hospital are not telling us anything his leg is starting to get sore and am scared its the cancer cause he has not had any treatment for it :( - looking for guidance.

User

Posted 24 Nov 2015 at 23:02

Hello Col15, it is hard to know exactly from your information but it sounds like your dad may have had a complication where the bone cancer is in the spine and affects his ability to walk, or the cancer is eating the bones which makes them too easy to break if he stumbled or fell. So the pin in his leg will be really important and will hopefully improve his mobility a bit. Sometimes the spread affects the bowel and causes constipation.

You say at the end of your message that you are concerned that the increasing pain is because he is not having any treatment. This will be very hard for you to read but I think you have misunderstood the situation - dad isn't having any treatment because it isn't working and the cancer has been spreading even though he was taking the hormones. Once they have stabilised his leg, there might be another kind of treatment that the doctors want to try, such as chemotherapy maybe but the doctors' main concern right now will be to improve his quality of life and reduce the pain.

Do you have any support? A family member or friend that you can talk to? Did you attend the appointments with the oncologist or did dad just tell you what he could remember afterwards?

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 24 Nov 2015 at 23:21

Just to add that if bones are becoming brittle/fragile, which can be made worse with HT, Dad could inquire whether a supplement could be given to help compensate.

Barry

User

Posted 25 Nov 2015 at 06:17

Sorry I should have said when we first got told his cancer was near the spine and thats why he got the doses of radiotherapy to take the pressure off as it could result in him maybe losing all power below - yeah a have been to the appointments with him, and I have a sister and my mum and partner, but I am trying to support my mum and sister and trying to be the strong one out of them for my dads sake, should have mentioned about the spine in my first post but this is all new to me.

User

Posted 25 Nov 2015 at 07:58

Okay - have you all been referred to a local hospice or a Macmillan nurse who can help with things like pain control? Also, dad may be entitled to some financial help and a disabled car badge if it is thought that there is no their treatment he can have.

Have any of you talked to dad about things like what kind of end of life care he would prefer - would he want to be at home or in a hospice? If not, maybe the Macmillan nurses could help with that as well

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 25 Nov 2015 at 08:18

Yeah we have mcmillian care, he has been in hospital for 5 weeks now so will be getting pain control in there, they were meant to be having like case meeting yesterday with all doctors and my dad was going to be one of them so am hoping they will have a plan in place for him:(

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