Hello Woody and welcome.
As the others have said really. I take it your dad is in his, what, 70s?
It took 9 months to find the cancer so one assumes it wasn't glaringly obvious. Or was it a question of no medical staff taking him/you seriously. On what basis did you "know" dad had prostate cancer. Is there a family history for instance?
At this stage of the game, try and let the anger go. It won't help you or him. You'll need to focus on what is available to him as treatment and get the best possible care you can. If you go to appointments all guns blazing you'll muddy the water of care.
Consultants will want to spend time discussing treatments. Use that time to find out as much as you can. If you go with him to appointments take a notebook and pen or ask the doctor if he minds you recording the appointment on your phone. There will be much to take in and without something to look at later you (none of you) will remember all that is said.
If there have been serious breaches in a GP or hospital's duty of care then take it up with The Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) at the hospital. They will listen.
Download the Toolkit from this site like Chris/Woody suggested. Not all information in it will be relevant to your dad since you don't know yet what stage he is etc but it will give you ideas of questions to ask when you attend appointments.
If you could find out the information regarding his Gleason score it will help with advice from us.
You are obviously worried that dad has had this cancer growing inside him untreated for 9 useless months. Some versions of prostate cancer are the pussy cat kind and can be safely left without treatment - just with monitoring. My husband had a year like that others have had many more on Active Surveillance and are happy to do that since there are no side effects of treatment.
ALL treatments have side effects, some to a lesser degree. Some men having exactly the same treatment as others will not react in the same way. Until you have a definite idea of what stage his cancer is, try and stay focussed on helping him get through it. I have no doubt you are doing your very best for him.
Anger (understandable as it is under the circumstances) is a wasted, exhausting, emotion when there is so much else going on.
We are all here for you both. Use us as your sounding board when it gets too much. There will be others on here who have had the same bad experiences with doctors and hospitals so let them help you when the time is right - when it comes to complaints.
I used the PALS service when our hospital kept cancelling appointments. We ended up with one sooner than the one they cancelled so it does work.
Best wishes to you and dad. You've found us now so use us. We are the best !!
Sandra
PS. I note from your profile that you are 53. With a dad diagnosed with Prostate Cancer it might be an idea to get the ball rolling on testing for yourself. Start by asking your GP for a PSA and take it from there. He shouldn't refuse
Edited by member 20 May 2016 at 08:56
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