Wow! Well thanks to each of you for your replies. I have been so gobsmacked by the understanding each of you have for my position, I just haven't been able to formulate a response until now. I am left wondering why I can't get my oncologist to understand.
I take your point Lyn about not having "failed" the HT route, but I really don't think it is fair to be counted out of the more advanced treatments because of it. I am not opposed to chemo if it would be beneficial for me. I am not opposed to carrying on with Degarelix in principle. It is just that I believe I have a bit of "normal" life to live before I am subjected to the worsening side effects of HT. The normal life span might only be a month, or it might be a year, but whatever it is, I can make really good use of it.
My idea of extending the spacing between injections is a kind of compromise. I have had a couple of incidences where I have had my injection a few days later than when they were due. During those few days, on each occasion, I felt really energised and so much better. My oncologist has claimed in the past that missing an injection wouldn't make me feel any better, because the effects would still be in my system. But I feel I have disproved that by those two incidences. But maybe that is only the way I react and may not be general.
I may be oversimplifying it, but I can't help thinking that after a year of HT treatment, during which my PSA has dropped dramatically from 168 to 1.7 and all other values are good too, I can afford to push it a little. So if my PSA and other levels rise, then they will quickly come down again when I restart the HT. I know there are no guarantees that this will happen, but the odds must be in my favour?
Andrew, you are not being morbid at all. I can identify with everything you say! If we can't treat dying in a light hearted way then we are completely lost.
Devonmaid, you have summed it up perfectly for me. Communication has completely broken down, in fact I don't think it was ever there in the first place.
Once again, thanks to all of you. I was beginning to think I was losing my ability to communicate.
Best wishes
Peter