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User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 10:08

I was diagnosed 3 weeks ago.  I really thought I was just going through precautionary tests and it would be fine.  With those 3 words - "you've got cancer" I moved instantly from one state to another.  From the smug and well to the person with cancer who needs help, support and treatment.  I'm very good at appearing to be taking it well.  Actually I am stunned that it is causing me to be so depressed.  I see people, a lot of people, profesionally for depression and I think now I really know what it is like from the inside.  I just can't shake off this heaviness.  I'm not inside conversations, even when its a really nice event.  My friends are amazing and really generous.  My partner is quietly concerned.  Yet I do feel angry and judgemental.  I know all the facts about prostate cancer.  I know the prognosis is good, but it angers me rather than reassures me when people tell me this.  As if I had a bad bout of flu!

I can't really understand this heaviness and I want to be rid of it.  Do I have to wait till after the operation (I think I'm going for Da Vinci) when presumably these cancer cells will be all gone?  Why has it hit me so hard?

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 12:43

Hi
The depression is crippling and seemingly endless. Having cancer touches you and your family in a way that can't be described. You must seek help from your GP or specialist nurse or ask for councelling etc.
I am now 3 yrs since diagnosis and 14 months post op , and uncured. I've suffered with severe depression all my life but had bumbled on ok and worked and coped etc , so the cancer was a double blow tbh. It has changed my life forever. I'm not the person I was anymore and find it hard to enjoy life at all sometimes but I'm really trying and have great support from family and friends and this wonderful forum. Speaking really helps get things off your chest so maybe try that. Very best wishes to you.

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 14:19
Hi,

I have found coping with cancer sometimes incredibly difficult . There's the initial shock of diagnosis and then the treatment plan which follows. I have always tried to positive throughout but occasionally it has really overwhelmed me. I have felt very lonely too, even with a supportive family and whilst I was at work , colleagues too, including those who had and have cancer.

None the less however much people try to understand and encourage you, it is you who is affected and has to cope. After I finished RT in January 2015, I mistakenly thought I'd return to a more normal and pre PCa way of life within a few months. That really got me down and I felt I was living in a Fug. My GP wanted to prescribe anti depressants but I resisted as I knew I'd have to do this for myself and not with the aid of more meds.

It didn't help when people told me I looked well, infact it was the worst thing anyone could have said to me. I would cry out inside " you don't know what I've been through and am still going through" whilst I would thank them politely !

The one place where I know I have proper support and understanding is here online. Being amongst others going through something similar. 18 months after RT I now feel so much better in myself, apart from the s/e of HT. Still tired sometimes and flush away like no ones business and attending to ED problems but I can now cope with all those, they're just part of my life now.

So today I am pleased to say, that for me I think I am though the worst emotionally ( at the moment ) , still trying to remain upbeat and positive. How long that remains for I do not know but it suits me fine for now.

I see an acupuncturist ( for hot flushes ) who specialises in PCa treatment and the sessions are also like counselling too. They have been very beneficial.

Even if I successfully reach undetectable status , I do not think that I shall ever completely move away from having PCa , but over time I hope that its impact will start to fade, and it will just become something that once happened to me.

Good luck,

John

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 18:28
I have advanced PC so an early end is probably inevitable. The first 3 months then the months 9 to 12 after treatment did me in mentally. I can't say what you will experience but I guess it won't be great however. 20 months on, despite knowing what it really means I love and love for every day. I think about "it" every day but most days I can deal with it the same way I can deal with a chore that needs sorting one day. I hope that you get through the stages as quick as poss but I do promise you that there is calm in the other side. Take care, Kev

Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 20:30

Hi John, welcome,from me as well. Thanks for posting your scores on the doors they are on the better side and where they need to stay. My PSA was 63 Gleason 3+4=7 T2 staging I was Dx Feb 2015 started Zoladex HT straight away and had RT that ended Nov2015. Before the RT my PSA dropped to 0.5 and after it has been 0.01 ( undetectable) ever since with blood test last Thursday and results this Thursday along with onco appointment.

On diagnosis it was half expected but still a bombshell and I was told that a prostectomy was not able to be done as my prostate was too close to my rectum wall and there were dangers associated with that.

I was and still am glad that I did not have a RP. I too was told that I was lucky to have PCa as it was the "nice" cancer!! What !! I thought being so lucky I must have won the lottery or something good like that, what a mentality, but some of this came from the medical profession.

I hope your treatment path is trouble free and, unfortunately, you will be the only one that can make it. You are on the best site to get all the information that you need to make it so keep asking questions from us and also the Multi Disciplinary Team or specialist nurse.

Regards Chris/Woody

Life seems different upside down, take another viewpoint

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 10:58

Hi Johnji

 

Welcome to this forum. You will find it very helpful for your questions and concerns.

I was diagnosed 3 years ago. Everything you have written describes how i felt. In fact it is as if i have written it!

The words "you've got cancer" hit me hard, especially as i had no symptoms or family history. Also i eat and drink carefully, am slim  and am a regular gym user. I am the only one in the family that goes to a gym and tries to look after myself. I was quite angry because i always felt i led a good lifestyle.I also had the anger when people told me i would be alright and to be positive during the first 3 weeks  of my diagnosis. They couldnt understand the turmoil going on in my mind.  

In the first 3 weeks i was so physically tired.Every part of my body seemed to ache and of course i presumed the cancer got into my bones. But this was due to the stress and worry of it all. Noone could get me out of this mood.

It took me 3/4 weeks to come out of this depression. The reason i started to become positive was that so many professionals and people who i met through a support group made me realise that it could be beaten. I had been diagnosed early on and so my chances were pretty good. I then decided i had to be more positive and i could sink or swim. My surgeon(i decided on da vinci) told me to get as fit as possible and so increased my gym sessions.he said treat the op as a boxing match. The fitter you are the easier the recovery will be. Going to the gym gave me a challenge and something to aim for. he was right as my recovery went really well.

I presume you have a copy of the tool kit. Are you in touch with a local support group? I am and that was a great help talking to people who had experienced this cancer and treatment.

Its a terrible shock and once you have accepted it then you can move on.But i understand this might sound a little difficult to take in at the moment

Keep in touch with us and dont hesitate to ask questions.

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 11:01

Hi, I was diagnosed 21st July and I can understand what you are feeling, I had 15 cores taken at biopsi, 6 were positive 5  3+3=6  1   3+4=7, PSA 3.7 doc said not to panic but how do you not, my wife said that it was good news as the scores were quite low but you have cancer how is that good news? all I can say is I now try to be positive and think it could be a lot worse, the people on this site have been a great help, I am still waiting for a bone scan then I will know the complete diagnosis and can decide what treatment to have I think the waiting is the worse,

best wishes

Paul

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 11:03  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 11:33

Johnji 

 

It hits us all in different ways. I still remember the feeling of lonliness I had 4 years ago , that heaviness. I really dont think enough is done to combat the mental impact this has upon us. You will go through these feelings now. Yes we can all learn about all the medical aspects of this disease and how they are treated, but we are all unique individuals and inside it will impact upon us all differently.  We will all have our own needs. All I can say really is that I found great comfort from chatting online here with people. Discussing my treatment and keeping me positive got me through the surgical treatment.

Post treatment I was hit even harder as i had never dreamed about the impact of loss of my manhood would mean , i was so focused on beating cancer. I wasnt prepared mentally for the physical impact of my treatment. That heaviness and depression came upon me without realizing. Thank goodness for support groups. I went to one in manchester. The ability to talk openly about my feelings with other men about everything I had gone through and was going through without anyone being judgmental really helped me on my journey. 

Things do get better. All I can say is try and find a support outlet that you can use where you can talk things through.  Dont be afraid of opening up to your GP or medical professional about the feelings you are having inside. They can help. This journey is not all about treating the cancer.

 

best regards

 

Eddie

Living life to the full, there is always someone worse of than yourself. Smile and get on with it.
User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 15:41

I think the anger stage is very common and for most men, quite short-lived. The grief tends to come later as you realise that you will never be the same again and that some side effects are permanent. My husband was in low mood for a time after his op but the depression didn't really kick in until the reality of impotence dawned on him. Finding a couple of years down the line that the op had failed and he had therefore gone through all this aggro for nothing - that was when he really went down. All is good now though - he got through it and every okay PSA test is another step to recovery.

What you said about other people's comments made me smile. We had a thread on it a while back and some of the things people had experienced were shocking. When J was waiting for his op and trying to get everything ready at work, one of his staff would not come in to his office - got into the habit of standing at the door to ask things. J said one day "it's okay - you can't catch it from me" to which the guy responded "well, you can't be sure of that, can you?" I found the most frustrating thing was the number of people who told us that prostate cancer is the best one to get, or "well my neighbour's uncle Freddie had that and he's fine" to which I usually respond "that's great news - how does he get an erection?" Shocking but it amuses us and the other person will sometimes then ask questions - anything to raise people's awareness!

You of course have additional heavy bags to carry - the professional analytical part of your mind going "Good lord man, you're no better than your patients" and the worry and fret about your son's future. It is reasonable to respond the way you have - I'm not convinced that it is depression when there is a clear reason for feeling so fuggy. 

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 15:50  | Reason: Not specified

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 18:40

Hello john and welcome to the site

Those well meaning comments can leave you feeling like you want to strangle the person making the comment but they really do mean to be supportive I'm sure.

You have already had so much on your plate, with the death from cancer of your son's mother and now your own PC.

You must be worrying a lot about your son but children really are resilient, and those aren't empty words, I know from experience.

You would appear to have made up your mind already that you are going for da vinci but if you post your Gleason and PSA scores you may well get helpful comments from others who are in a similar position

Chrisj must understand well what you mean about the depression since as he says he has suffered for years and he also has a young family.

We are incredibly supportive of each other because we really do understand what the feelings are like. It is only about 3 weeks since diagnosis and it is all still new and enormous to you.

Life does settle a bit once you have made a choice (an informed choice - bearing in mind all the possible side effects so that they don't take you by surprise further down the line) although that might be hard to believe at the moment.

You have a lot to live for, with a supportive partner and a young son to think about. With our help you will get through this.

All the best

Sandra


*******

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 21:56

3+3=6 and Gleason 5.1 are "Good" believe it or not. Could have been much much worse anyway.

Have you been told that you have a Tiger (aggressive) or the pussycat version as I just wondered why you had opted for surgery with those scores.

Was Active Surveillance offered to you? If so, perhaps you don't like the idea of doing nothing. Truly though AS isn't "nothing" it's another way of life where you are regularly monitored. Not every man can think of living with a cancer inside him though.

AS does offer breathing space though so that you can be absolutely sure of your treatment path. Remember, whichever route you take there are potential side effects so please don't rush into anything but think your options through carefully.

I think it has already been suggested that you obtain the Toolkit from Publications (or ask one of the nurse of you would rather have the hard copies) Lots of useful information in there

Enjoy your family holiday and put this behind you for a while (if you can)

Best Wishes

Sandra
********

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 21:57  | Reason: Not specified

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 27 Jul 2016 at 19:40
Hi John,

I remember only too well being given the results of the biopsy and being told I had cancer. I was expecting it really given my family history but was still hoping it was an infection or similar issue. I can't recall anger. I felt a bit helpless at first because I needed the bone and MRI scan so my path was in the hands of results and a multidisciplinary team. Once I knew my options I knew what to focus on.

Psychologically, over 12 months since my op, I know it took a lot out of me. I no longer have the same energy I had before and am more cautious with life decisions. I think because I had never had a major illness in my 60 yers of living and had been at a reasonable level of fitness it pulled me up short and shattered my myth of having eternal good health.

Everyone deals with things differenly. I feel you need to focus on one step at a time at the moment. Most people don't know what to say but your true friends will be there for you.

Hope all goes well.

Paul

THE CHILD HAS GROWN, THE DREAM HAS GONE
Show Most Thanked Posts
User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 10:58

Hi Johnji

 

Welcome to this forum. You will find it very helpful for your questions and concerns.

I was diagnosed 3 years ago. Everything you have written describes how i felt. In fact it is as if i have written it!

The words "you've got cancer" hit me hard, especially as i had no symptoms or family history. Also i eat and drink carefully, am slim  and am a regular gym user. I am the only one in the family that goes to a gym and tries to look after myself. I was quite angry because i always felt i led a good lifestyle.I also had the anger when people told me i would be alright and to be positive during the first 3 weeks  of my diagnosis. They couldnt understand the turmoil going on in my mind.  

In the first 3 weeks i was so physically tired.Every part of my body seemed to ache and of course i presumed the cancer got into my bones. But this was due to the stress and worry of it all. Noone could get me out of this mood.

It took me 3/4 weeks to come out of this depression. The reason i started to become positive was that so many professionals and people who i met through a support group made me realise that it could be beaten. I had been diagnosed early on and so my chances were pretty good. I then decided i had to be more positive and i could sink or swim. My surgeon(i decided on da vinci) told me to get as fit as possible and so increased my gym sessions.he said treat the op as a boxing match. The fitter you are the easier the recovery will be. Going to the gym gave me a challenge and something to aim for. he was right as my recovery went really well.

I presume you have a copy of the tool kit. Are you in touch with a local support group? I am and that was a great help talking to people who had experienced this cancer and treatment.

Its a terrible shock and once you have accepted it then you can move on.But i understand this might sound a little difficult to take in at the moment

Keep in touch with us and dont hesitate to ask questions.

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 11:01

Hi, I was diagnosed 21st July and I can understand what you are feeling, I had 15 cores taken at biopsi, 6 were positive 5  3+3=6  1   3+4=7, PSA 3.7 doc said not to panic but how do you not, my wife said that it was good news as the scores were quite low but you have cancer how is that good news? all I can say is I now try to be positive and think it could be a lot worse, the people on this site have been a great help, I am still waiting for a bone scan then I will know the complete diagnosis and can decide what treatment to have I think the waiting is the worse,

best wishes

Paul

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 11:03  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 11:09

Amazing to have 2 replies so quickly. thank you. I think I have accepted this diagnosis, but can't quite understand why it has hit my sense of self so deeply. That advice about continuing going to the gym and seeing this as a boxing match could help my positivity return.

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 11:33

Johnji 

 

It hits us all in different ways. I still remember the feeling of lonliness I had 4 years ago , that heaviness. I really dont think enough is done to combat the mental impact this has upon us. You will go through these feelings now. Yes we can all learn about all the medical aspects of this disease and how they are treated, but we are all unique individuals and inside it will impact upon us all differently.  We will all have our own needs. All I can say really is that I found great comfort from chatting online here with people. Discussing my treatment and keeping me positive got me through the surgical treatment.

Post treatment I was hit even harder as i had never dreamed about the impact of loss of my manhood would mean , i was so focused on beating cancer. I wasnt prepared mentally for the physical impact of my treatment. That heaviness and depression came upon me without realizing. Thank goodness for support groups. I went to one in manchester. The ability to talk openly about my feelings with other men about everything I had gone through and was going through without anyone being judgmental really helped me on my journey. 

Things do get better. All I can say is try and find a support outlet that you can use where you can talk things through.  Dont be afraid of opening up to your GP or medical professional about the feelings you are having inside. They can help. This journey is not all about treating the cancer.

 

best regards

 

Eddie

Living life to the full, there is always someone worse of than yourself. Smile and get on with it.
User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 11:49
Hi,

Welcome to our very special group who will offer you the best support you could wish for.

I think the way you feel affects us all when you hear we have Cancer. You are not alone. Don't be afraid to ask for help. I needed to. Speak to your doctor, there's no need to be embarrassed.

May I wish you all the best for your treatment plan.

Keep us updated.

Steve

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 13:12  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 12:43

Hi
The depression is crippling and seemingly endless. Having cancer touches you and your family in a way that can't be described. You must seek help from your GP or specialist nurse or ask for councelling etc.
I am now 3 yrs since diagnosis and 14 months post op , and uncured. I've suffered with severe depression all my life but had bumbled on ok and worked and coped etc , so the cancer was a double blow tbh. It has changed my life forever. I'm not the person I was anymore and find it hard to enjoy life at all sometimes but I'm really trying and have great support from family and friends and this wonderful forum. Speaking really helps get things off your chest so maybe try that. Very best wishes to you.

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 14:19
Hi,

I have found coping with cancer sometimes incredibly difficult . There's the initial shock of diagnosis and then the treatment plan which follows. I have always tried to positive throughout but occasionally it has really overwhelmed me. I have felt very lonely too, even with a supportive family and whilst I was at work , colleagues too, including those who had and have cancer.

None the less however much people try to understand and encourage you, it is you who is affected and has to cope. After I finished RT in January 2015, I mistakenly thought I'd return to a more normal and pre PCa way of life within a few months. That really got me down and I felt I was living in a Fug. My GP wanted to prescribe anti depressants but I resisted as I knew I'd have to do this for myself and not with the aid of more meds.

It didn't help when people told me I looked well, infact it was the worst thing anyone could have said to me. I would cry out inside " you don't know what I've been through and am still going through" whilst I would thank them politely !

The one place where I know I have proper support and understanding is here online. Being amongst others going through something similar. 18 months after RT I now feel so much better in myself, apart from the s/e of HT. Still tired sometimes and flush away like no ones business and attending to ED problems but I can now cope with all those, they're just part of my life now.

So today I am pleased to say, that for me I think I am though the worst emotionally ( at the moment ) , still trying to remain upbeat and positive. How long that remains for I do not know but it suits me fine for now.

I see an acupuncturist ( for hot flushes ) who specialises in PCa treatment and the sessions are also like counselling too. They have been very beneficial.

Even if I successfully reach undetectable status , I do not think that I shall ever completely move away from having PCa , but over time I hope that its impact will start to fade, and it will just become something that once happened to me.

Good luck,

John

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 15:41

I think the anger stage is very common and for most men, quite short-lived. The grief tends to come later as you realise that you will never be the same again and that some side effects are permanent. My husband was in low mood for a time after his op but the depression didn't really kick in until the reality of impotence dawned on him. Finding a couple of years down the line that the op had failed and he had therefore gone through all this aggro for nothing - that was when he really went down. All is good now though - he got through it and every okay PSA test is another step to recovery.

What you said about other people's comments made me smile. We had a thread on it a while back and some of the things people had experienced were shocking. When J was waiting for his op and trying to get everything ready at work, one of his staff would not come in to his office - got into the habit of standing at the door to ask things. J said one day "it's okay - you can't catch it from me" to which the guy responded "well, you can't be sure of that, can you?" I found the most frustrating thing was the number of people who told us that prostate cancer is the best one to get, or "well my neighbour's uncle Freddie had that and he's fine" to which I usually respond "that's great news - how does he get an erection?" Shocking but it amuses us and the other person will sometimes then ask questions - anything to raise people's awareness!

You of course have additional heavy bags to carry - the professional analytical part of your mind going "Good lord man, you're no better than your patients" and the worry and fret about your son's future. It is reasonable to respond the way you have - I'm not convinced that it is depression when there is a clear reason for feeling so fuggy. 

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 15:50  | Reason: Not specified

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 15:45

Just a PS to say that Surr's point is an important one. While you are nurturing yourself and working through this phase (as you undoubtedly will), don't make the mistake of telling yourself all will be back to normal after the op. Some of the worst hit members on here over the years have been those that didn't understand - or had not been warned - that this never goes away. Oncologists rarely talk about a cure - you are aiming for full remission - and PSA testing will be a part of the rest of your life. Realistic people tend to be the ones that cope and bounce back best.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 17:13

Totally agree with Lyn and what she says about other peoples comments! So frustrating. I will have to remember the one about the erection. Laugh out loud.x

Max

"You can only play the hand you're dealt"

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 18:28
I have advanced PC so an early end is probably inevitable. The first 3 months then the months 9 to 12 after treatment did me in mentally. I can't say what you will experience but I guess it won't be great however. 20 months on, despite knowing what it really means I love and love for every day. I think about "it" every day but most days I can deal with it the same way I can deal with a chore that needs sorting one day. I hope that you get through the stages as quick as poss but I do promise you that there is calm in the other side. Take care, Kev

Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 18:40

Hello john and welcome to the site

Those well meaning comments can leave you feeling like you want to strangle the person making the comment but they really do mean to be supportive I'm sure.

You have already had so much on your plate, with the death from cancer of your son's mother and now your own PC.

You must be worrying a lot about your son but children really are resilient, and those aren't empty words, I know from experience.

You would appear to have made up your mind already that you are going for da vinci but if you post your Gleason and PSA scores you may well get helpful comments from others who are in a similar position

Chrisj must understand well what you mean about the depression since as he says he has suffered for years and he also has a young family.

We are incredibly supportive of each other because we really do understand what the feelings are like. It is only about 3 weeks since diagnosis and it is all still new and enormous to you.

Life does settle a bit once you have made a choice (an informed choice - bearing in mind all the possible side effects so that they don't take you by surprise further down the line) although that might be hard to believe at the moment.

You have a lot to live for, with a supportive partner and a young son to think about. With our help you will get through this.

All the best

Sandra


*******

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 19:43

I can't believe how many of you have written since I first made an entry this morning.  Thank you for your effort, your humour and your thoughts.  Had no idea all this support and interest was out there.

Not feeling particularly better, but why should I yet?  Having a holiday with my partner and son in a couple of weeks and hope to be really there for that.  Some of what you said post op was sobering, but I'd rather be realistic.

My gleeson is 3+3 = 6

8/12 cores were cancerous from the biopsy

psa is 5.1

Anyway, good to have some insight into the emotional impact as well as stats.

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 20:30

Hi John, welcome,from me as well. Thanks for posting your scores on the doors they are on the better side and where they need to stay. My PSA was 63 Gleason 3+4=7 T2 staging I was Dx Feb 2015 started Zoladex HT straight away and had RT that ended Nov2015. Before the RT my PSA dropped to 0.5 and after it has been 0.01 ( undetectable) ever since with blood test last Thursday and results this Thursday along with onco appointment.

On diagnosis it was half expected but still a bombshell and I was told that a prostectomy was not able to be done as my prostate was too close to my rectum wall and there were dangers associated with that.

I was and still am glad that I did not have a RP. I too was told that I was lucky to have PCa as it was the "nice" cancer!! What !! I thought being so lucky I must have won the lottery or something good like that, what a mentality, but some of this came from the medical profession.

I hope your treatment path is trouble free and, unfortunately, you will be the only one that can make it. You are on the best site to get all the information that you need to make it so keep asking questions from us and also the Multi Disciplinary Team or specialist nurse.

Regards Chris/Woody

Life seems different upside down, take another viewpoint

User
Posted 26 Jul 2016 at 21:56

3+3=6 and Gleason 5.1 are "Good" believe it or not. Could have been much much worse anyway.

Have you been told that you have a Tiger (aggressive) or the pussycat version as I just wondered why you had opted for surgery with those scores.

Was Active Surveillance offered to you? If so, perhaps you don't like the idea of doing nothing. Truly though AS isn't "nothing" it's another way of life where you are regularly monitored. Not every man can think of living with a cancer inside him though.

AS does offer breathing space though so that you can be absolutely sure of your treatment path. Remember, whichever route you take there are potential side effects so please don't rush into anything but think your options through carefully.

I think it has already been suggested that you obtain the Toolkit from Publications (or ask one of the nurse of you would rather have the hard copies) Lots of useful information in there

Enjoy your family holiday and put this behind you for a while (if you can)

Best Wishes

Sandra
********

Edited by member 26 Jul 2016 at 21:57  | Reason: Not specified

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 27 Jul 2016 at 19:40
Hi John,

I remember only too well being given the results of the biopsy and being told I had cancer. I was expecting it really given my family history but was still hoping it was an infection or similar issue. I can't recall anger. I felt a bit helpless at first because I needed the bone and MRI scan so my path was in the hands of results and a multidisciplinary team. Once I knew my options I knew what to focus on.

Psychologically, over 12 months since my op, I know it took a lot out of me. I no longer have the same energy I had before and am more cautious with life decisions. I think because I had never had a major illness in my 60 yers of living and had been at a reasonable level of fitness it pulled me up short and shattered my myth of having eternal good health.

Everyone deals with things differenly. I feel you need to focus on one step at a time at the moment. Most people don't know what to say but your true friends will be there for you.

Hope all goes well.

Paul

THE CHILD HAS GROWN, THE DREAM HAS GONE
 
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