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Our roller coaster with our Dad

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User
Posted 17 Aug 2016 at 10:04
My Dad is a normally healthy 68 year old, who still works. In June he was diagnosed with prostate cancer, and rather harshly told it had spread to his bones and lymph node and it wasn't curable. His PSA was 117. His Gleason score is 9 one side and 10 the other.

He started on hormone therapy injections immediately and has since had 4 lots. He also started chemo as part of the stampede trial. He has been feeling unwell, extremely worn out and quite down over the last few days. His PSA is now down to 6.7. My brother and I feel optimistic that his PSA has dropped dramatically and we are hoping this is a good sign?

This roller coaster of emotions and feelings is absolutely horrific for all of us as we are an extremely close family, and to see our Dad so low is quite unbearable. My Dad is struggling with what the future could hold, as there's no time scales and he likes to be in control of everything.

Any thoughts and advise greatly appreciated.

User
Posted 17 Aug 2016 at 11:20

Hello Annie and welcome. I see that Lyn has already replied on a previous post regarding HT and chemo.

As for the rest of your post, we do all understand what the feeling of diagnosis is like. Many having had the HT etc will identify with your dad's feelings.

If the treatment is making him generally unwell then that is what he is going to focus on right now and it must be hard for him to think that this treatment is trying to give him some time.

Continue with the optimism, even if dad has been told he is incurable. There are members on here who have been told uncurable and live their daily lives with that fact, the difference being that they are living their lives to the full. Easy to say at the moment but harder to grasp because he is feeling like c**p.

None of us has a time scale, even the healthy among us so best to think in terms of living for today and let tomorrow take care of itself, and that goes for all of us.

Yes you are all living on a roller coaster of emotions and that is very wearing for you all. Dad is not going to appreciate being jollied along and looking on the bright side, not yet anyway.

All you can do is be there, listen to him and reassure him as best you can.

We are here if you need us. In the meantime look at the Publications section and download or order a copy of The Toolkit. It covers treatments, side effects and emotions which may help you all. If you need specific information you could trying telephoning one of the specialist nurses on their hotline number of 0800 074 8383.

In the meantime try and stay as calm as you can. Hopefully dad will feel better in time and more in control

Best Wishes

Sandra

******

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 17 Aug 2016 at 12:56

Hi Annie, I thought it might be useful to copy my original reply to your new thread.

Re your question, it depends what you mean by 'a good sign' - generally, I would hope for the PSA to have gone lower than 6.7 by now but the chemo can cause a rise as the cancer cells fight and then die. A better marker of how well the HT is working would be to keep track of his testosterone level rather than his PSA - do you have his most recent testosterone score?

Edited by member 17 Aug 2016 at 12:57  | Reason: Not specified

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

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User
Posted 17 Aug 2016 at 11:20

Hello Annie and welcome. I see that Lyn has already replied on a previous post regarding HT and chemo.

As for the rest of your post, we do all understand what the feeling of diagnosis is like. Many having had the HT etc will identify with your dad's feelings.

If the treatment is making him generally unwell then that is what he is going to focus on right now and it must be hard for him to think that this treatment is trying to give him some time.

Continue with the optimism, even if dad has been told he is incurable. There are members on here who have been told uncurable and live their daily lives with that fact, the difference being that they are living their lives to the full. Easy to say at the moment but harder to grasp because he is feeling like c**p.

None of us has a time scale, even the healthy among us so best to think in terms of living for today and let tomorrow take care of itself, and that goes for all of us.

Yes you are all living on a roller coaster of emotions and that is very wearing for you all. Dad is not going to appreciate being jollied along and looking on the bright side, not yet anyway.

All you can do is be there, listen to him and reassure him as best you can.

We are here if you need us. In the meantime look at the Publications section and download or order a copy of The Toolkit. It covers treatments, side effects and emotions which may help you all. If you need specific information you could trying telephoning one of the specialist nurses on their hotline number of 0800 074 8383.

In the meantime try and stay as calm as you can. Hopefully dad will feel better in time and more in control

Best Wishes

Sandra

******

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 17 Aug 2016 at 12:56

Hi Annie, I thought it might be useful to copy my original reply to your new thread.

Re your question, it depends what you mean by 'a good sign' - generally, I would hope for the PSA to have gone lower than 6.7 by now but the chemo can cause a rise as the cancer cells fight and then die. A better marker of how well the HT is working would be to keep track of his testosterone level rather than his PSA - do you have his most recent testosterone score?

Edited by member 17 Aug 2016 at 12:57  | Reason: Not specified

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

 
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