Husband been diagnosed

User

Posted 06 Nov 2016 at 14:29

Afternoon - I've been looking through this site since my husbands symptoms started this April 2016 . Things have moved on pretty quick since then , my husband was diagnosed with PC on 25th October , was told about 3 lots of treatments but his ongologist suggested because of his age (57) he should have the prostate removed . We are going to see the consultant / surgeon on Tuesday and my husband has said he wants to have the op . It will be done by robot . He said hes isn't bothered about the op , he's terrified of the after affects and not being able to get back to "normal" .

We've been told to make a claim through our CI insurance, but to be honest everything is just a blur - can't imagine how he is feeling trying to hold it together . Thanks for reading .

User

Posted 14 Nov 2016 at 20:14

Thank you for your replies - my husbands going for his pre op on Wednesday , saw the consultant last week and he said definalty have the prostate removed . Said he will be in before Xmas

Things are moving on very quick.. you've all probably been through this but it just doesn't seem real yet that this is happening . We have a great marriage and we are constantly talking , we know they're are tough roads ahead we are gonna weather this storm . Sorry if I. Appear to be very matter of fact but this seems to be how we are both coping at the moment .

Thanks again for the replies find this site very helpful x

User

Posted 14 Nov 2016 at 20:58

Hi Lilly,

I am following a similar path to your husband. I have my op on 1st December, Robotic removal.

Don't be sorry for being matter-of-fact, that's how we cope. Both my wife and I have scientific backgrounds and treat the whole thing as a learning opportunity. My very black sense of humor also helps.

I had a couple of operations early in the year for something unrelated, so the operation holds no fear for us.

WE had a good laugh when I came home from an appointment with the physio, she demonstrated a pump on my hand as she thought I will probably need one after the op. A conversation i would not have dreamed of having a month back.

The incontinence bit could be a b****r, no sympathy from Mrs N she says having babies is a lot worse (really?) :-)

I plan on getting some external catheters for attending some Christmas events just as the catheter comes out :-~

Good luck to you both.

Nigel

User

Posted 15 Nov 2016 at 01:10

I've had to do intermittent self catheterisation for about 10 years. It's no problem. In fact it makes things easier. I never have to go to the loo at night or any other inconvenient time.

Good luck Adrian

User

Posted 15 Nov 2016 at 06:45

Hi Lilly

Sorry you are here.

As a general rule CI policies pay out when the Gleson score is 7 or higher although each policy is different. I had two policies with different insurers and they both had that rule do both paid out. Hope that helps, thinking of you both, Kev

Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019

User

Posted 15 Nov 2016 at 16:28

Hi Lizzy,

Think I'm almost in the same boat as your husband (2yrs younger) My wife is also very supportive. Hope all works out well.

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User

Posted 07 Nov 2016 at 07:49

Hi Lilly
Sorry no-one has replied. The weekend can be quiet on the forum. So sorry to hear of your plight. It would be really good if you had a little more info regarding his psa scores and biopsy results , Gleason scores etc. What scans has he had. You could then possibly wait a while and ensure you have read through the publications section of this website or phoned the nurses. It's vital you understand the treatments and possible side-effects. Has hubby seen an Oncologist and not just a surgeon. It may be that he could radiotherapy or Bracchy or hormone therapy or a combination that could be just as effective.
Click my picture and read my profile. I am just 49. One thing I will say about surgery is that he WILL Be fully impotent for a very long time after the op. Sometimes forever , and it is a very hard thing to accept. I'm just recovering marginally 17 months after the op. I was lucky continence wise and dry almost immediaely. It depends what his priorities in life are !! Please come back and tell us more. Everyone is here for you.
Chris

User

Posted 08 Nov 2016 at 19:26

Hi Lilly, I am 11 months post robot operation and I am not back to "normal", however I do not take any of the tablets provided, last ones I took gave me a headache and I felt dizzy after. It did not take me too long to be dry and not need to wear any of the Tena pads after the operation.

This is a new chapter in your lives and you both need to be understanding of each other and patience.

James

Edited by member 09 Nov 2016 at 10:56 | Reason: Not specified

User

Posted 08 Nov 2016 at 21:23

Hi Lilly
I was diagnosed with PC in February of this year. Although my cancer was contained within the prostate and was low risk I had additional problems. With a growing prostate that was sqeezing my urethra I was unable to empty my bladder and I was permanently retaining up to 500mls. I was advised and agreed to have a robotic assisted prostatectomy. This was carried out on 10 October and I am so far very pleased with the progress I have made. I had a catheter for two weeks and upon its removal I was only retaining about 40mls and after 4 weeks I am 95% continent. My next goal is to overcome erectile dysfunction, at the moment that part of me has gone into hibernation!
All I can do is to wish your husband every success and if he decides to have the robotic assisted surgery to have no regrets about his decision.
Best wishes to you also, I could not have managed without the support of my wife.

Brian.

Edited by member 08 Nov 2016 at 21:24 | Reason: Not specified

User

Posted 08 Nov 2016 at 23:07

Hi Lilly - there are some men on here that have been successful with CI claims but many policies have a clause saying they will not pay for contained prostate cancer, only those that have spread. I tried to claim on our insurance when J needed the salvage treatment but they declined on the basis that curative treatment had still been offered. Worth talking to your insurers but read your terms & conditions first?

Edited by member 08 Nov 2016 at 23:07 | Reason: Not specified

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 14 Nov 2016 at 20:14

Thank you for your replies - my husbands going for his pre op on Wednesday , saw the consultant last week and he said definalty have the prostate removed . Said he will be in before Xmas

Thanks again for the replies find this site very helpful x

User

Posted 14 Nov 2016 at 20:58

Hi Lilly,

I am following a similar path to your husband. I have my op on 1st December, Robotic removal.

I had a couple of operations early in the year for something unrelated, so the operation holds no fear for us.

The incontinence bit could be a b****r, no sympathy from Mrs N she says having babies is a lot worse (really?) :-)

I plan on getting some external catheters for attending some Christmas events just as the catheter comes out :-~

Good luck to you both.

Nigel

User

Posted 15 Nov 2016 at 01:10

I've had to do intermittent self catheterisation for about 10 years. It's no problem. In fact it makes things easier. I never have to go to the loo at night or any other inconvenient time.

Good luck Adrian

User

Posted 15 Nov 2016 at 06:45

Hi Lilly

Sorry you are here.

Dream like you have forever, live like you only have today Avatar is me doing the 600 mile Camino de Santiago May 2019

User

Posted 15 Nov 2016 at 16:28

Hi Lizzy,

Think I'm almost in the same boat as your husband (2yrs younger) My wife is also very supportive. Hope all works out well.

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