I am so sorry to read of your loss of your dear Tony. I can imagine how you are feeling now - it is now over seven years since I lost my husband, Mike, in similar circumstances.
The fried egg theory is a good one, I have always heard it referred to as 'balls in a jar' but it is similar. Initially the theory goes the grief is all-consuming but as you start to change your life the ball of grief reduces as other balls enter the jar.
As you say we are all different but if the fried egg theory has resonated with you you may take a similar route to me. I can say for me over time the grief has softened and little pockets of happiness started to creep in. Initially life had no purpose at all and I felt completely lost, but I hope it helps you to know that I am now almost always happy. I think of Mike often, he is really still, and always will be, a part of my life. But my memories have become comfortable and comforting. You may think this is impossible for you now, and it does take time, and as long as it takes, there is no timescale. But the overwhelming feelings you have now will reduce.
Initially there is so much to do, but slowly when I was ready I found I took up new interests and met new people. I also took up volunteering, which put some purpose back into life. It was really one foot in front of the other and several steps backwards to begin, but I am now fortunate to be living a good happy life, with Mike tucked away quietly in my heart forever.
I hope my story helps just a little to give you hope. Now your mind and body must be exhausted and you need to take care of you as you start to heal. Please take any offers of help, people like to help but don't always know what to do, and just little bits of practical help can help you so much.
I wish I could make it easier for you, but as I was told at a similar time, it is a tunnel we go through and eventually we reach the light at the other end.
Take care, Janet, x