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Tears and moods

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User
Posted 20 Feb 2018 at 22:02
Hello / my husband is 6 weeks into hormone treatment and due another implant later this week. Good news is that his psa has dropped by 27 in just 4 weeks and hopefully he can begin radiotherapy in 4/5 weeks.

He’s become quite tearful (so unlike him) moody, cross, depressed and talking about giving up work - the loss of libido is having a huge impact on him and he’s feeling less of a man despite my efforts to tell him otherwise. We know these are symptoms of the HT and we were expecting them but do things level out after a while or are the next 3 years going to be this stressful for him ?

I’m trying to focus on the positives - huge drop in psa - 6 weeks closer to it all being over - etc etc Is this normal and will he feel a bit better in himself as time goes on ?

Thanks in advance

User
Posted 23 Feb 2018 at 19:16
I was diagnosed too late for a cure so I’ll be on hormone treatment pretty much forever until it all stops working and....... Anyway, my message is to tell hubby to seek out acupuncture. It’s helped me enormously with fatigue and hot flushes. I got 10 sessions provided free by The Christie and my local Neil Cliff Centre also offer it. I am still pretty devastated by the whole emasculation thing and I’m now 10 months post diagnosis. We’ve had a bit of counselling from a specialist MacMillan nurse which has helped and I would certainly ask about that support
User
Posted 20 Feb 2018 at 22:29

In my case the first 12 months was the most troublesome. But that was me your hubby might fare much better. Keep looking at the positive the cure is still on the cards.

Ray

User
Posted 22 Feb 2018 at 15:33

Hello Sue,

It's bad enough that our men have to put up with all the things that are really important to them,like loss of libido , without the tearfulness and lethargy as well.

Even when you expect them as part of the treatment, reality is the shock isn't it.

I believe that keeping up with exercise is supposed to help, although probably if he is lethargic he won't feel much like it.

 

Perhaps trying to get out of the house for a short walk and increase the distance as he starts to feel a bit better?

Edited by member 22 Feb 2018 at 15:33  | Reason: Not specified

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 22 Feb 2018 at 17:49

Sue, I think it is important to focus on survival and the things that promote that. He must really want to get through this treatment and to do everything to help the treatment. Attacking the lethargy with regular gentle exercise will not just stop the weight gain but promote a better sense of well-being. With that the lethargy will fade away. I think your husband, if he is positive about this, will find that he adjusts to the "new man", tears and all and accepts life as it is likely to be for the time he is on ADT. It is still early days for him. His mood will improve, I'm sure.

Good Luck

AC

User
Posted 23 Feb 2018 at 08:35

Hi Sue

I over came a lot of my mood swings by getting a Dog, Love him to bits.

Stu

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User
Posted 20 Feb 2018 at 22:29

In my case the first 12 months was the most troublesome. But that was me your hubby might fare much better. Keep looking at the positive the cure is still on the cards.

Ray

User
Posted 22 Feb 2018 at 15:33

Hello Sue,

It's bad enough that our men have to put up with all the things that are really important to them,like loss of libido , without the tearfulness and lethargy as well.

Even when you expect them as part of the treatment, reality is the shock isn't it.

I believe that keeping up with exercise is supposed to help, although probably if he is lethargic he won't feel much like it.

 

Perhaps trying to get out of the house for a short walk and increase the distance as he starts to feel a bit better?

Edited by member 22 Feb 2018 at 15:33  | Reason: Not specified

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails
User
Posted 22 Feb 2018 at 17:49

Sue, I think it is important to focus on survival and the things that promote that. He must really want to get through this treatment and to do everything to help the treatment. Attacking the lethargy with regular gentle exercise will not just stop the weight gain but promote a better sense of well-being. With that the lethargy will fade away. I think your husband, if he is positive about this, will find that he adjusts to the "new man", tears and all and accepts life as it is likely to be for the time he is on ADT. It is still early days for him. His mood will improve, I'm sure.

Good Luck

AC

User
Posted 23 Feb 2018 at 08:35

Hi Sue

I over came a lot of my mood swings by getting a Dog, Love him to bits.

Stu

User
Posted 23 Feb 2018 at 19:16
I was diagnosed too late for a cure so I’ll be on hormone treatment pretty much forever until it all stops working and....... Anyway, my message is to tell hubby to seek out acupuncture. It’s helped me enormously with fatigue and hot flushes. I got 10 sessions provided free by The Christie and my local Neil Cliff Centre also offer it. I am still pretty devastated by the whole emasculation thing and I’m now 10 months post diagnosis. We’ve had a bit of counselling from a specialist MacMillan nurse which has helped and I would certainly ask about that support
User
Posted 22 Sep 2018 at 17:25

I had the robotic prostatectomy in the spring ,then all the indignities and inconveniences  of recovery. All seems to be well though, PSA good and clinic appoints will follow etc etc.

One thing I HAVE noticed is this. I used to be  a fairly tough bugger if i disagreed with loved ones in conversation or even argument. Nowdays, specially if i am defending my point of view, instead of holding my own and even raising my voice, I just get sad and even tearful. What's even worse is that now I seem to be on the road to some sort of recovery close family are adopting the "now that you recovering -pull yourself together approach" when i turn the taps on....

I know that anger is "loss"--so that helps me. Going through cancer is going through one heck of a lot of change both for patient and those close. 

Does this makes sense!

 
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