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Husband newly diagnosed Pc awaiting surgery

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User
Posted 31 Mar 2018 at 20:54
My husband 53 diagnosed with T3a PC Gleason score 4+3 awaiting surgery originally planned 23/3 but cancelled due to BMI concern although he’s only BMI 34 surgeon said needs to lower his BMI .
He’s extremely worried his cancer will spread during this delay when he had MRI feb his cancer still contained in prostate although bulging but all nurses etc say don’t worry it’s not going to spread
My worry is he is in avoidance doesn’t want to read or discuss anything with anyone and I’m feeling alone in this and trying to support him in this nightmare .
Any help would be appreciated 👍
User
Posted 31 Mar 2018 at 22:31

Hello,
So it seems I have similar tumor type. Also t3a but gleason 8 and awaiting surgery. Surgery is scheduled for next Thursday.
When I was diagnosed and had all my exams done back mid February I was told not to worry about spreading because even though aggressive it is not as it is that quick. Well, we are in fear, aren't we? but I was told to take my time to decide and get all the information I needed for the decision.
All the best to your husband and yourself. Try to get as much as the experience of others in this forum. For me reading and sharing experiences here have been very valuable.
Paulo

User
Posted 31 Mar 2018 at 23:49

Hi,


I can understand your concern as I thought the same when I was diagnosed.  Perhaps you only want advice on whether it will spread but it might be better to know what you have to do and if there is something else you can do. 


I have read that surgeons don't like to do prostectomies on overweight people and I recall my surgeon said to me that I looked thin enough.


Presumably the operation was postponed after the pre-op assessment.   I see you have another appointment in late April.   Did they say how much weight needs to be lost and what happens if it's not achieved.   It could be that hormones and radiotherapy will be offered and it could be that it would be better to go on that route earlier instead.   Some say the outcomes are very similar but there are secondary effects for both, but that's another discussion.


I could think more about this but it's bedtime and perhaps someone else will come up with some thoughts.


regards
Peter


 

User
Posted 01 Apr 2018 at 11:22
Thank you for your reply , You sound to have been told the same information as my husband about not to worry about the possibility of it spreading .
He just seems to believe he’s been left in limbo until he returns on 26/4 to see surgeon ,surgery was the option he’s chosen and we’ve seen about radiotherapy but he seems keen to remove by surgery whenever that happens !
Best of luck with your treatment !
I’m traveling through lots of posts trying to find as much advice and information from this forum .
Regards

Edited by member 07 Apr 2018 at 19:08  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 01 Apr 2018 at 12:37

The wait may be frustrating but the medical staff have presumably weighed up the risk and felt that the risk of serious complications while under general anaesthetic are far greater than the risk of the cancer spreading. It is easy to imagine cancer cells romping around the body uncontrollably but it isn’t quite like that - even so, the sooner his BMI is down the better for you both.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
User
Posted 14 Apr 2018 at 18:41

Hello MonkeyMad,


I am slightly older at 58 But had a slightly lower BMI of 31. Getting as fit as possible before the surgery is a smart move anyway. I had the same gleason score & had surgery last Monday 9/4/18 so am still a little sore. I have had lots of goes at getting fitter in the past, but weather, work, old motorbike injuries & everything else made it hard to keep it up. The PSA score of 17 changed all that for me. As everyone says the cancer doesnt grow that fast & every positive change you can make now will help. If you can find something you both like doing, so you can encourage, perhaps just walking a dog? I have got into Kayaking, just a nice gentle paddle down a quiet canal on a sunday morning is healthy & theraputic. Really looking forward to getting back in my boat in a few weeks time.  Whatever thing interests you most will have a local club & they are generally full of nice people keen to, encourage others to take up what ever it is you fancy. Likely to make some new friends too! My kayak club provided all the kit to start with & are lovely people. Best of luck with everything, the hardest part of any journey is the first step, try not to make it to daunting & just do it! 


Regards, Mike.

User
Posted 11 Jun 2018 at 19:11

lt's a nice feeling when the op is done and I am sure you are both happy that he is now able to recover at home.


It's major surgery and so he needs to be kind to himself and not try to rush things.


All the best with the recovery.


Kevan 

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User
Posted 31 Mar 2018 at 22:31

Hello,
So it seems I have similar tumor type. Also t3a but gleason 8 and awaiting surgery. Surgery is scheduled for next Thursday.
When I was diagnosed and had all my exams done back mid February I was told not to worry about spreading because even though aggressive it is not as it is that quick. Well, we are in fear, aren't we? but I was told to take my time to decide and get all the information I needed for the decision.
All the best to your husband and yourself. Try to get as much as the experience of others in this forum. For me reading and sharing experiences here have been very valuable.
Paulo

User
Posted 31 Mar 2018 at 23:49

Hi,


I can understand your concern as I thought the same when I was diagnosed.  Perhaps you only want advice on whether it will spread but it might be better to know what you have to do and if there is something else you can do. 


I have read that surgeons don't like to do prostectomies on overweight people and I recall my surgeon said to me that I looked thin enough.


Presumably the operation was postponed after the pre-op assessment.   I see you have another appointment in late April.   Did they say how much weight needs to be lost and what happens if it's not achieved.   It could be that hormones and radiotherapy will be offered and it could be that it would be better to go on that route earlier instead.   Some say the outcomes are very similar but there are secondary effects for both, but that's another discussion.


I could think more about this but it's bedtime and perhaps someone else will come up with some thoughts.


regards
Peter


 

User
Posted 01 Apr 2018 at 11:22
Thank you for your reply , You sound to have been told the same information as my husband about not to worry about the possibility of it spreading .
He just seems to believe he’s been left in limbo until he returns on 26/4 to see surgeon ,surgery was the option he’s chosen and we’ve seen about radiotherapy but he seems keen to remove by surgery whenever that happens !
Best of luck with your treatment !
I’m traveling through lots of posts trying to find as much advice and information from this forum .
Regards

Edited by member 07 Apr 2018 at 19:08  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 01 Apr 2018 at 12:37

The wait may be frustrating but the medical staff have presumably weighed up the risk and felt that the risk of serious complications while under general anaesthetic are far greater than the risk of the cancer spreading. It is easy to imagine cancer cells romping around the body uncontrollably but it isn’t quite like that - even so, the sooner his BMI is down the better for you both.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
User
Posted 10 Apr 2018 at 19:54

Hi MonkeyMad


I went through RP last summer and am now stuck in my own limbo waiting to see an oncologist as I probably have a re-ocurrence.


Waiting is not fun, I agree.


I kind of fell off the rails a bit as I suffer from anxiety (fitness and diet a little bit, drink a bit more) as a result. I am only now dragging myself back on track.


I have built up a checklist of things to work on:


- Knowledge: Learn as much as you can. Very hard if you have avoidant tendencies but that is where #2 comes in


- Counselling: Get a good counsellor (preferably one with experience of cancer) and start working on the things that cause trouble


- Diet: I am trying to hit several angles - vegetarian / fish, intermittent fasting, lower calories, lower carb and using MyFitnessPal to track calories


- Supplements: I am using Vitamin D, Aspirin and will be asking about statins. I suggest you do the reading on this and see what is best


- Fitness: Have settled on a routine of weights and HIIT (high intensity aerobics) as often as I can


- Meditation: I am forcing myself to look into this but this is my biggest battle


The reason I mention all these is that my avoidance was "oh bugger it is back, it never woirked, why bother" but I reflected that without this it could have been worse and if I leave off it could make it worse.


I realised that it is more important to do something, anything, to keep afloat. In many ways, the more (variety not overload) the better.


It is hard to face up to having this dratted condition but facing up to doing the things that help you press on is a little easier and with luck will help with the bigger battles.


Good luck


Pete

User
Posted 14 Apr 2018 at 18:41

Hello MonkeyMad,


I am slightly older at 58 But had a slightly lower BMI of 31. Getting as fit as possible before the surgery is a smart move anyway. I had the same gleason score & had surgery last Monday 9/4/18 so am still a little sore. I have had lots of goes at getting fitter in the past, but weather, work, old motorbike injuries & everything else made it hard to keep it up. The PSA score of 17 changed all that for me. As everyone says the cancer doesnt grow that fast & every positive change you can make now will help. If you can find something you both like doing, so you can encourage, perhaps just walking a dog? I have got into Kayaking, just a nice gentle paddle down a quiet canal on a sunday morning is healthy & theraputic. Really looking forward to getting back in my boat in a few weeks time.  Whatever thing interests you most will have a local club & they are generally full of nice people keen to, encourage others to take up what ever it is you fancy. Likely to make some new friends too! My kayak club provided all the kit to start with & are lovely people. Best of luck with everything, the hardest part of any journey is the first step, try not to make it to daunting & just do it! 


Regards, Mike.

User
Posted 11 Jun 2018 at 18:54

Update 


my hubby had his radical prostectomy on 5/6/18 


he was home the following day although he is very tired and sore but all seems to have gone well with his surgery although will have to wait for further results 


the hardest part now over although got lots of appointments ahead but can only move on steadily through this strange place 


helping us through is everyone’s support from this forum and people’s own personal stories 


thanks to all 👍

User
Posted 11 Jun 2018 at 19:11

lt's a nice feeling when the op is done and I am sure you are both happy that he is now able to recover at home.


It's major surgery and so he needs to be kind to himself and not try to rush things.


All the best with the recovery.


Kevan 

 
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