I had this surgery with DaVinci robot mainly because I would feel reassured to remove the tumor with the prostate. I know this is not always like that, but at least for me I considered I might had the feeling I could control more if the disease would develop. Also I rather wanted to deal with the side effects now than later, which is the case for surgery and not always for radiation (I mean I was told side effects after radiation therapy start to appear later).
As for what is worrying you more in your decision I am afraid I don’t have so many answers yet as I told you I had surgery only 2.5 months ago. My recovery has been ok though.
I am almost continent now. I had already days with zero leakages over the last 2 weeks. If you go via surgery route I advise you to start the Kegel exercises a few weeks before the surgery and get back with the exercises as soon as the catheter is removed. Something very important, at least for me it worked a lot, do the exercises while walking.
I don’t have a firm lasting erection yet, but I am sensing improvements. The erections last for a very short while and are very close to the orgasm. I am very disciplined in all I do, so always using a pump almost every day now. I am taking a 5 mg Cialis pill a day and a 200mg Avanafil pill once a week. And estimualting myself everyday when the partner is not there. I am patient and hope time will heal the ED too.
Very recently I have been questioning when to allow anal penetration again. After hearing / reading other guys experience (in the US there is a forum like this for gay people, in Portugal I don’t find any and here in UK you are the first I am talking to) I concluded I could start anal penetration after 3 months of the surgery. There are people who say we should allow the body to heal a longer period, but the majority said 3 months would be enough. We just needed to be careful and have a partner that would know your situation and do it carefully. If we had any pain, we needed to stop and allow longer time to heal. I also found the courage to ask my doctor and this week he told me that I could start my regular sex life. So I did. Yesterday it happened and I tell you it was good, no pain and it was pleasurable as before. I can tell you more in a private email chat if you want. For more information I also need to experience as time goes by as all is new to me too.
My anxiety now is actually more related with the PSA test I will be doing early July.
All the best to you,