I fully understand your pain and distress.
My Dad has Prostate Cancer with secondary bone mets in his ribs, shoulder, 2 compression fractures in his spine, arm hips and now in his bladder. He has a catheter fitted. He has always managed the cancer well until the beginning of this year when he developed COPD and had Urinary Sepsis. Both these illnesses allowed the cancer to really take hold.
He has been having hormone injections for years and in May had 5 days of Radiotherapy to his spine. He was given Enzalutamide but stopped after 3 months as his PSA had risen to 545. Now monthly Zometa IV.
Now its just HT injections and pain relief when needed.
He has been in hospital for day care as since his last Zometa drip 3 weeks ago he hasn't been able to eat or drink without being sick.
They have said his platelets ate low at 38 but not low enough for a transfusion. He is very weak now.
Dad isn't ready to give up. His heart is strong. He doesn't understand with an escalating PSA why jis consultant only wants to see him every other month now. He asked if they had given up on him.
I try constantly to keep his fighting spirit up, but its exhausting. I feel broken inside. I have a great supportive family who look after me but I need to talk to someone about this and they don't want to hear about the sadness.
I just want someone to tell me how long I have with Dad. Im not ready to let him go.