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User

Posted 21 Aug 2019 at 14:16

Hi guys

Just coming upto 9 weeks post op continence is virtually normal.

I have the very rare tiny leek I'm just wandering is it time to bite the bullet and ditch the pad.

I know it's probably personal choice but just wanted to know you're thoughts.

I'm fine with sneezing and coughing and basically leading a normal ish life.

Just have that little bit of fear of going pad free

Cheers

Garry

Be positive stay positive

User

Posted 21 Aug 2019 at 16:51

It was a scary step for me too. When I had surgery I dropped boxers and trunks for briefs which held the pad and supported my baseball batted testicles properly. One tip is that when I went padless I always stored Percy pointing upwards which took a bit of getting used to but by fluid dynamics prevented any dribbles !!

User

Posted 21 Aug 2019 at 14:16

Hi guys

Just coming upto 9 weeks post op continence is virtually normal.

I have the very rare tiny leek I'm just wandering is it time to bite the bullet and ditch the pad.

I know it's probably personal choice but just wanted to know you're thoughts.

I'm fine with sneezing and coughing and basically leading a normal ish life.

Just have that little bit of fear of going pad free

Cheers

Garry

Be positive stay positive

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 12:35

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

I think if you are still leaking 3 years post-op it is time to see a specialist - have you had a referral to a continence clinic for assessment or been back to see the urologist who did your op?

I was, I suppose too accepting of the whole "You've got Cancer" thing from the start.
I didn't ask questions, just followed the path of Surgery, Radiotherapy, Hormones.
I was aware of PSA 14.7 Gleason 9. Apart from that, nothing.
Other members of this forum quote all kinds of other figures that are meaningless to me.
I've never been referred to anybody, continence, sexual etc.
I just return every 6 months for a PSA check.
"You're still below .02, we'll see you in 6 months".
"You still leaking"?
"Yes".
"Anything like an erection?
"No".
"Ah well......See you in 6 months".

repeat......

I can afford the Tena pads and just accept this is how I am.
I've been through enough surgeries in my life (Motorcyclist) that I don't care for any more.
Vacuum pumps, implants, Viagra? I'd rather have fond memories of "normal" sex.
You stated that even with the best surgeons a man can be left with permanent incontinence.
I didn't realise that, I thought I'd been lax with my exercises or doing them wrong.
Ah well......I accept I'll probably just leak a bit for the rest of my life.

On the bright side, I've given up Motorcycling for fear of a massive leak pulling a 'bike onto its centre-stand.
That may extend my life far beyond what I expected.

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User

Posted 21 Aug 2019 at 14:34

You probably need to understand you will leak occasionally regardless, just make sure you have decent supportive pants! No more going native I'm afraid!

User

Posted 21 Aug 2019 at 16:51

User

Posted 21 Aug 2019 at 19:23

I agree with Chris, point Percy upwards it definitely helps. Going pad less is a personal choice, however in my case 12 weeks after RP I still get the occasional leak and my brain doesn’t tell me that it is coming. It normally happens when I am sitting, not sure why, it happened this evening. I am pad less and have been for six weeks, accidents, well about three. Overall I am quite satisfied with my recovery.

All the best

Peter

User

Posted 23 Aug 2019 at 15:04

Thanks for your reply guys it seems percy will be pointing upwards from now on

Garry

Be positive stay positive

User

Posted 23 Aug 2019 at 15:26

I have been left with a fraction of what my brilliant surgeon started with, so no up nor down, just straight out - but next to no incontinence and zero erectile function.

I was lucky as I bought a pack of 14 Tena Lights post-op, and only needed a few of them and have half a pack left!

The incontinence I refer to is a rare occasional dribble, easily absorbed by cotton Tanga briefs (from M & S), but there have been a very few occasions when in bed after a gallon or two when I have woken up to a warm puddle.

C’est la vie, I guess. Maybe I should pad after a sesh?

Cheers, John.

User

Posted 26 Aug 2019 at 16:58

Hi Garry,

It happened the same with me as Chris described. I felt reasured by using briefs.

I reduced the size of the pads after 1 months of surgery and I stopped using regularly any pad 3 months after surgery. 2 weeks before the 3 months as I was on holiday I tested myself and I didn't use a pad one day or the other. What I was not really so confident was during the evenings particularly if I would drink a glass of wine for dinner. Wine or any alcoholic beverages, spicy food, coffee for me was and is still something I have reduced a bit at dinner since surgery as it makes me dribble a bit during the evenings and during social events is still a nuisance.

All the best,

Paulo

User

Posted 21 Oct 2019 at 19:43

Hi i will be having my surgery soon and was wandering what are the best pads to get to cope with the leaking

thanks

User

Posted 21 Oct 2019 at 21:26

Ask first whether the hospital you are under will provide any for you to take home for use immediately after the op. Also ask whether there is a continence pad service on the NHS in your area - some do, some don't.

If not provided for you, I would buy Tena for men, available in all large supermarkets and often on a buy-one-get-one-free deal. You can also buy a couple of packs of the boots own make - some men prefer these as they are thicker but John worried that people would be able to see them. Don't buy in huge bulk until you have a sense that you will actually need them.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 21 Oct 2019 at 21:41

3 years post-op.

Leaking like a sieve.

Jealous of you all.

Yes, I did all the exercises.

Yes, I still do.

Is it common to eventually be "dry"? I thought my situation was the norm.

2 pads per day......

User

Posted 21 Oct 2019 at 22:23

My experience was largely as Lyn mentions. Tena look neater, Boots are bigger and cosy in Winter. Boots were a lot cheaper 3 years ago. I bought a large pack of Boots just as it suddenly got a lot better around 5 months.

In the early days they can fill without you realising especially when walking and then it runs down your leg. That only happened once as I carried spares after that. Weight is a better way of telling how full they are.

Unklian, It's usual to be pretty dry in 6 months but some do better than others. I met one bloke with a tap after 7 years and another using a lot of pads after 18 months who'd had a trainee surgeon.

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 00:11

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

3 years post-op.
Leaking like a sieve.
Jealous of you all.
Yes, I did all the exercises.
Yes, I still do.
Is it common to eventually be "dry"? I thought my situation was the norm.
2 pads per day......

Men can be quite evangelical about the pelvic floor exercises and some come to believe that their 'dryness' is because they did the right exercises exceptionally well. In turn, this can inadvertently make other men feel that they are being criticised or that it is being suggested they just haven't tried hard enough. In fact, continence is largely a matter of luck; even the best surgeons in the country can leave a man with permanent incontinence sometimes and no amount of exercises are going to make a difference. It is partly to do with your internal pipework and whether the second sphincter needed to be moved / relocated - sometimes incontinence is down to vital muscle being cut or damage to the urethra.

I think if you are still leaking 3 years post-op it is time to see a specialist - have you had a referral to a continence clinic for assessment or been back to see the urologist who did your op?

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 12:35

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

I think if you are still leaking 3 years post-op it is time to see a specialist - have you had a referral to a continence clinic for assessment or been back to see the urologist who did your op?

repeat......

On the bright side, I've given up Motorcycling for fear of a massive leak pulling a 'bike onto its centre-stand.
That may extend my life far beyond what I expected.

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 13:07

Great post Garry.

I'm exactly 3 weeks post op, hoping to get dry soon but understand it can take 3 months to 3 years!

Good luck to you all.

Jeff

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 14:18

Unklian, surgery isn't the only option for continence such as yours - visiting a continence clinic may lead to all sorts of help you didn't know existed, including physiotherapy, TENS (electronic pulses to hep tighten the muscles controlling urine flow), Botox injections ... or even just to try a conveen sheath or similar for biking days.

Are you dry at night?

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 19:03

Strangely......I've been dry at night pretty much from day 1.
I slept naked all my life until the operation.
I now wear Tena night pants.
I bought them fully expecting them to be a daily thing and have (touch-wood) never had the slightest dribble at night.
I'm sure I'm not supposed to, but I wear them for a full week.
Not a hint of a mark in them.

I'm coming up to another 6 monthly check......Bloods in November, results in December.
I'll try to be more pro-active and see what is suggested for the day problems.

Cheers for the suggestions, Lyn.

User

Posted 22 Oct 2019 at 19:59

Being dry at night is a really good indicator that a) major permanent damage has not been done and b) things may improve during the day with the right help!

Chase it up - no one should just accept that this is how it has to be until someone actually says 'this is how it will always be'! Worth asking at your appointment whether it is the consultant (or nurse specialist) that should refer you for further investigations / assessment, or whether it is the GP who needs to do it.

Edited by member 22 Oct 2019 at 20:01 | Reason: Not specified

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

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