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User
Posted 13 Oct 2019 at 10:47

Over the last few days I have been reading lots of your inspiring and informative posts. Starting this conversation is making a feel a little bit more real. I apologise if I don’t get the etiquette or the terminology right. I am the worried partner. P is my partner. In March this year he had a psa test - 4.8 . GP wasn’t overly concerned as Dre was fine. We are just back from 6 months in France. P had another psa - down to 4.3 but GP said she could feel 2 knobbly bits. I wasn’t there so don’t know exact words and I don’t want to ask P again - trying to stay so calm. He has been referred to a urologist for an mri I think. He has a phone interview on Wednesday and then it will be arranged.

We are in Oxford. I would really like to know what to expect, what to ask and how best to support P. He is 61 and very fit - tennis, cycling, hiking, gym. He does get up more often to pee at night and says that the flow is no where the flow of for example our 25 year old son. Thank you for reading.

 

 

 

User
Posted 13 Oct 2019 at 11:50

Wait for the MRI before you start worrying about anything

Oh and don't have pissing competitions with 25 year olds!!

Edited by member 13 Oct 2019 at 11:51  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 13 Oct 2019 at 12:31

If he is getting a multi-parametric mri, he will get a pirad score.  My score was 5, meaning clinically significant cancer was highly likely to be found upon biopsy.  So, don't forget to ask for his pirad score when he gets his mri results.

Other than that, it's a waiting game and you just have to be patient.  Strangely, I found knowing what I had to deal with better than not knowing, so I was glad when my diagnosis was confirmed and then I could at least get on with dealing with it.

Members of this forum will help to clarify things for you if he needs treatment.  And don't forget the specialist nurses from PCUK - call them - they're brilliant.

User
Posted 14 Oct 2019 at 14:09
He almost certainly won't be given a choice of biopsy - it's whatever the standard is at that hospital. The biopsy is nothing to lose sleep over - the anticipation is far worse than the event!

Just a matter of waiting for all the tests now. Try not to go down the "What if..." road. Just wait and see.

Best wishes,

Chris

User
Posted 14 Oct 2019 at 21:37

Very short answer from an also fairly recently diagnosed :  go to all the appointments, be there for him as my wife has been for me - 2 sets of ears are really better than one (when you’re both in shock), also take notes, it’s so easy on your phone or simply just take a notepad, and they don’t (or shouldn’t) mind. Also ask for copies of the consultants’ letters to the GP. Information is King in my book.  Best of luck to BOTH of you

User
Posted 16 Oct 2019 at 13:25
This is good news - getting an MRI before biopsy suggests that the hospital you are under has adopted the newer standards for diagnosis. If the MRI shows any suspect areas, the information will be used to target the biopsy. In areas where they still use the traditional pathway, the biopsy is done first and if it picks up any cancer, an MRI is done to see how much and where. Obviously, doing a biopsy first is like sticking a pin in a fruit cake and hoping to spear a cherry.
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 16 Oct 2019 at 20:41

My hubby was told he had 40-60% chance of cancer from a DRE... and a PIRADS score of 5 do we were prepared for the worst... a biopsy (19 different samples) cleared him and he is now under surveillance and antibiotics for prostitis. He is 63 and healthy- so try to be positive until you have the whole picture. 

User
Posted 30 Oct 2019 at 14:33

So pleased for you both

User
Posted 30 Oct 2019 at 16:09

Great news. 

Ido4

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User
Posted 13 Oct 2019 at 11:50

Wait for the MRI before you start worrying about anything

Oh and don't have pissing competitions with 25 year olds!!

Edited by member 13 Oct 2019 at 11:51  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 13 Oct 2019 at 12:31

If he is getting a multi-parametric mri, he will get a pirad score.  My score was 5, meaning clinically significant cancer was highly likely to be found upon biopsy.  So, don't forget to ask for his pirad score when he gets his mri results.

Other than that, it's a waiting game and you just have to be patient.  Strangely, I found knowing what I had to deal with better than not knowing, so I was glad when my diagnosis was confirmed and then I could at least get on with dealing with it.

Members of this forum will help to clarify things for you if he needs treatment.  And don't forget the specialist nurses from PCUK - call them - they're brilliant.

User
Posted 14 Oct 2019 at 11:55

Thank you all for your replies. Sadly, you all seem so knowledgeable. P and me have had an amazing talk about it this morning. He is so positive - even if something is found. Me being the ultimate pessimist ( a really annoying personality trait I know) am convinced that he will be diagnosed with cancer and then it seems there are a big range of options. How on earth do you know which one/ones are the right ones??  If he is offered a biopsy, which is the best? In reality do you have any choice or is it just what your hospital has? Happy Monday!

User
Posted 14 Oct 2019 at 14:09
He almost certainly won't be given a choice of biopsy - it's whatever the standard is at that hospital. The biopsy is nothing to lose sleep over - the anticipation is far worse than the event!

Just a matter of waiting for all the tests now. Try not to go down the "What if..." road. Just wait and see.

Best wishes,

Chris

User
Posted 14 Oct 2019 at 21:37

Very short answer from an also fairly recently diagnosed :  go to all the appointments, be there for him as my wife has been for me - 2 sets of ears are really better than one (when you’re both in shock), also take notes, it’s so easy on your phone or simply just take a notepad, and they don’t (or shouldn’t) mind. Also ask for copies of the consultants’ letters to the GP. Information is King in my book.  Best of luck to BOTH of you

User
Posted 16 Oct 2019 at 12:22

So, hospital rang P this morning. He’ll get an appointment for an mri in next 2 weeks. Nothing else booked in yet but They want him to repeat the psa to see if still falling. P has told me in no uncertain term to stop worrying. He said the consultant said he was not overly concerned. Does this all sound pretty standard? Spoke with our 3 boys today so they know what is going on. They gave their mother a lesson in dealing with stress - they really don’t seem to have got my pessimistic streak!

User
Posted 16 Oct 2019 at 13:25
This is good news - getting an MRI before biopsy suggests that the hospital you are under has adopted the newer standards for diagnosis. If the MRI shows any suspect areas, the information will be used to target the biopsy. In areas where they still use the traditional pathway, the biopsy is done first and if it picks up any cancer, an MRI is done to see how much and where. Obviously, doing a biopsy first is like sticking a pin in a fruit cake and hoping to spear a cherry.
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 16 Oct 2019 at 20:41

My hubby was told he had 40-60% chance of cancer from a DRE... and a PIRADS score of 5 do we were prepared for the worst... a biopsy (19 different samples) cleared him and he is now under surveillance and antibiotics for prostitis. He is 63 and healthy- so try to be positive until you have the whole picture. 

User
Posted 30 Oct 2019 at 12:29

Thanks for the time you all took to reply. I feel like I have had a crash course in Pca. We’re just back from the hospital with I think really good news. Paul’s mri was normal. Nothing suspicious seen. Consultant said this gave him an 85% chance of being cancer free. He recommended 6 monthly psa tests and if 3 consecutive rises or a 25% increase seen to have further investigations. He also said that if Paul wanted further reassurance he would do a biopsy but as the mri showed nothing, he wouldn’t know what he was aiming at. Sending you all love and positive thoughts for whatever journeys you may be on.

User
Posted 30 Oct 2019 at 14:33

So pleased for you both

User
Posted 30 Oct 2019 at 16:09

Great news. 

Ido4

 
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