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Looking for some thoughts and support please

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 13:58

Hi,

I’m new to the group (today). 

I’m a gay man and my partner has been diagnosed with prostrate cancer that has spread.

I think I am coming out of the shock and anger stage and now trying to do plenty of reading to understand what I need to be aware of and what I can do to support. (Chemo already begun and extensive radio soon.)

Bearing in mind the weird COVID world we live in I am sure there is no ‘group meeting’ in real life but is there a general chat room to share thoughts, understandings, and empathise with guys in similar situations? (Or is this it?)

 

thanks guys, Christopher 

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 15:24
This is it 🤣 Having said that, there are hospitals or Maggies centres that run local support groups and PCUK supports some of these - you should be able to find out via Google whether there is a group in your area.

PCUK was also running a face to face support group for gay, bi and trans men and their partners but I think that this hadn't met for quite a while, even before Covid.

You will find more relevant information on the GBTQ section of this forum, including other MSM who have been where you & your partner are. Some of the specific implications for you and your partner depend on whether he is a bottom, top or versatile. Some MSM find it a struggle at hospital or doctors appointments because medics may have no understanding of anal sex or why erectile dysfunction and the loss of the prostate is so significant to this group.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 15:36

My local hospital has a group who meet.  Although I've never been and I don't know if they're meeting during Covid.   It's a long way from London.

Andy62 who writes on here a lot runs a group who meet somewhere in the South East.

You can ring PC UK I'd think, they offer all kinds of support and not just to patients.

 

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 15:57

There is a PCUk facebook page and just last it has set up a group for gay men.  You have to request to join. I will attempt to PM you the link.

Best wishes to you both 🌹

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User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 15:24
This is it 🤣 Having said that, there are hospitals or Maggies centres that run local support groups and PCUK supports some of these - you should be able to find out via Google whether there is a group in your area.

PCUK was also running a face to face support group for gay, bi and trans men and their partners but I think that this hadn't met for quite a while, even before Covid.

You will find more relevant information on the GBTQ section of this forum, including other MSM who have been where you & your partner are. Some of the specific implications for you and your partner depend on whether he is a bottom, top or versatile. Some MSM find it a struggle at hospital or doctors appointments because medics may have no understanding of anal sex or why erectile dysfunction and the loss of the prostate is so significant to this group.

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 15:36

My local hospital has a group who meet.  Although I've never been and I don't know if they're meeting during Covid.   It's a long way from London.

Andy62 who writes on here a lot runs a group who meet somewhere in the South East.

You can ring PC UK I'd think, they offer all kinds of support and not just to patients.

 

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 15:57

There is a PCUk facebook page and just last it has set up a group for gay men.  You have to request to join. I will attempt to PM you the link.

Best wishes to you both 🌹

User
Posted 06 Nov 2020 at 17:25

Hi Christopher,

There are about 25 (of the approx 100) local support groups meeting on Zoom.

At least one (and possibly now both) of the LGBTQ+ local support groups are meeting on Zoom.

I will PM you.

Wishing you and your partner all the best.

 
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