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Stage 3a diagnosis at 44

User
Posted 22 Feb 2021 at 22:58

Hello everyone! Last week was a bit of a bombshell week for prostate cancer in my family. First my dad died as a result of the disease on Monday. He'd been diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer 4 years earlier aged 75. He'd become refractory to treatment and went downhill quite quickly over January and early February.


Then 72 hours later, I received the news I had been dreading. That I'd become the 3rd generation of the family to be diagnosed with prostate cancer, only a lot younger - being 44. I've been given a stage 3a diagnosis, with a Gleason grading of 7 (3+4). I have a suspicious bulge on one side of the prostate, where all cores came back (3+3), so it seems that all the 4 cells are within the prostate itself. Both sides came back positive 5/6 cores cancerous on one side and 3/6 cores cancerous on the other. My MP-MRI showed no evidence of seminal vesicles invasion and lymph nodes look ok.


The treatment I've been recommended is a radical prostatectomy with extended lymph node dissection and I'm looking into getting this done ASAP. I'd be interested in hearing from anyone who's had a similar diagnosis at a similarly young age. A lot of the information I've found seems like the average age for this sort of treatment is a lot older, so I'm not sure whether to expect more side-effects / less side-effects; how long should I plan on being out of action etc.? 


Not really sure how I've taken all this. At the moment I kind of feel like the surgery is just an "event" that needs to be planned for, but I suspect I'm in a bit of denial with everything that has happened, at the same time as my dad dying. 

User
Posted 23 Feb 2021 at 01:20
You will find other men of similar age in the section devoted to young men. The youngest we have had on here was early thirties I think but a friend of ours lost his son to advanced prostate cancer at the age of 27 - it does seem that the younger you are, the more aggressive and persistent the cancer tends to be so surgery is probably the right way to go in your case. That's not to say that it won't be difficult - the side effects of RP can be devastating at any age but particularly for young people. I was a week past my 45th birthday and my husband was 50 at diagnosis; that was 11 years ago now and life is good but it has been really hard sometimes and he has often said that he regrets having had the op. Hard to keep in context that difficult side effects are usually better than an early death although you will soon meet other members who have made the decision to put quality of life above longevity.

You can read about the effect on sex life, etc., in my thread 'one wife's story of ED' but the first thing is to finish getting all your diagnostics and see what treatments the multi-disciplinary team think are suitable for you. I am assuming that you have had a bone scan? If you haven't yet finished having a family (or perhaps not yet started) you can also ask whether there is an option to have your sperm frozen before treatment starts.
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard
User
Posted 23 Feb 2021 at 01:26
If you have not done so already, order or download the ‘Toolkit’ comprehensive information folder from this website’s publications section.

If you click on my screen name you can read my contemporaneous notes about my surgery and recuperation. I feel I was very lucky compared to some here who had a much worse experience. I had a very good surgeon who had over 4000 prostatectomies to his credit. I was aged 62.

Best of luck.

Cheers, John.
 
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