Just to post something a little more hopeful...
I had my partial nerve sparing RARP 16 months ago at the age of 68.
I've had some issues since that point with incontinence - the most general problem is having an urge to pee, even though my bladder isn't full. I have some control over that urge, but sometimes it gets too much and I have to dash to the loo. I've had two small accidents at night, which I can only explain by dreaming I was having a pee. I've had about half a dozen dashing to the loo after a walk and getting a severe urge as my key went in the door. I also had a small dribble roughly every other day.
Nurse put me on some Toltorodine but they didn't do much and the surgeon suggested I try some diet changes instead, I now have one decaf tea for breakfast and the rest of the time I drink herbal tea with no citrus (I used to drink Lemon teas a lot, but no more). This has actually seemed to help, but also it has got better over time. I find that drinking wine is no problem, but beer guarantees numerous visits unless it's a very hot day. No more dribbles and no more accidents for the last couple of months, so definite progress.
As I used to get urges due to increased prostrate size, I have been used to coping with the need to pee, and I've continued my coping patterns - don't drink too much liquid before going out, have a pee before I go and be aware of public loo locations. There are also a few well-watered bushes on my country walks.
You're obviously worse than I ever was, but there is hope things will improve and I would try whatever suggestions your medical team offer.