My 33 days with Cancer
Day 22
So, I’m joined in my ‘private room’ by my intruder ‘Steve’ Now I know how the queen felt when Michael Fagan intruded into her bedroom and sat on the end of her bed, very unwelcome.
Everyone had gone home now; the curtains were swished back from around his bed by the nurse as she left the room revealing the giant in the bed next to me.
The giant lay fast asleep I could see the back of his head, I knew he was still alive as I could just see his body moving up and down as he lay there, eventually he turned and opened his eyes. Big ugly thing, I was happy with the thought that he wouldn’t be able to get out of bed and eat me.
“Alright” he said “yeah you aright” We discussed our various aches and pains, but the giant at this stage was still groggy still coming around after his afternoon’s operation and after a little while told me we had to stop talking now as he wanted to go back to sleep and with that he turned his back, him, telling me what we are going to do in my room!!! I let it go.
Sometime later he awoke, and I could see that he was more awake this time, a little more with it, more responsive.
We talked some more and after a while I was warming to this giant who went by the name of Steve; besides I had noticed that he had been supplied with sweeties! In fact, he had been left with a hell of a lot more than me I looked to my bedside table and saw ‘NOTHING” while he seemed to have just had a Tesco delivery.
Steve had Jelly babies he opened the packet, “would you like a Jelly baby” he asked, a sharer I thought that’s good “yes please” problem is that neither of use can move much and we certainly can’t get out of bed. Steve decided he would throw one across whilst I lay like a Cuckoo with my mouth open in the hope of being fed. He missed and the Jelly Baby went flying over the bed onto the floor, he tried again but before long the floor was littered with Jelly babies’ I could see them so near yet so far. Eventually I think I caught one it was a great sugar rush.
The nurse arrived on the scene stepping over and around the jelly babies, I don’t think she thought I was serious when I asked her to pick them up for me, I couldn’t convince her and they went in the bin. I would have eaten them.
“ok” she said “time for your injection” “my what” “your injection” “what for” my god will this never end I thought; she went on to explain that I had to have an injection to thin my blood so that I didn’t develop blood clots. FFS here we go again something else they decided to leave out I just wanted to be left alone, she injected me in the belly.
That night Steve and I got to know each other very well because neither of us could sleep very well as we were awake most of the night and we found that we both had the same sense of humour which was great as the night went quickly and in hindsight was happy that I had someone to talk to.
Night gave way today. Now I want to stop here a minute because to understand what happened next you really need to understand the type of character that next entered the room to this end I would like you all to watch the attached Julie Walters “two soups’ Clip.
The door swung open and in walked ‘Julie Walters’ we stopped talking immediately and our eyes were transfixed onto this woman. “What would you like to drink” she said “tea, two sugars” replied Steve “coffee for me please with a sweetener” I said, “ok’ and what do you want to eat?” was her next question. “Cornflakes and white toast” said Steve” “brown toast with butter and strawberry jam” I said. She looked at neither of us instead stared straight at the floor, “alright” she said as she doddered back out still staring at the floor.
A few minutes later she came back in just like Julie Walters in the sketch. Delivered Steve’s order then delivered mine and wandered back out the room. I looked down at my breakfast I had a cup of tea with sugar, white toast no butter and marmalade I got nothing that I had asked for, nothing. I asked Steve what he’d got his was perfect. Steve said she reminded him of Julie Walters in the two soups sketch and we couldn’t eat for laughing, we were both worried about bursting whatever stitches we now had, a seriously funny moment.
How am I feeling?
Ok a little tired though given again the interrupted sleep still going to toilet 6 times in the night 1.5
Pete
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As my schoolmaster would have said, "got the bones and the gravy too"!