Sorry you have had not had any replies so far Anne, presumably because no one else is currently in quite the same boat?
I'm not quite at that stage yet either despite also having recently been diagnosed with recurrent advanced PCa. This apparently means the cancer has now escaped the prostate bed and spread to other parts of the body. However, neither an MRI nor a PET scan has succeeded so far in locating the pesky cancer cells, so I'm kind of in limbo waiting to take my next PSA test in July.
For context I should perhaps mention that I was first diagnosed with PCa 13 years ago at the age of 65 and in 2009 underwent a robotic prostatectomy and radiotherapy. The surgeon did warn me that he had been unable to remove all the cancer cells and that there was therefore a chance of recurrence further down the line.
Sure enough my PSA has been rising pretty much ever since, at first very slowly but over the past couple of years it has kind of taken off and currently stands at a fraction over 12. My onco has indicated that if/when it reaches somewhere between 15 to 20 he will urge that I undertake a course of HT and possibly also chemo. I would hardly say the prospect of either treatment fills me with relish!
However, I choose not to let the outlook bother me too much, simply because there is absolutely zero point in worrying. My attitude is, what will be, will be, meantime I'm going to forget about it all and focus on enjoying my life to the full.
I'm not going to pretend that I'm totally free of the fall-out from my prostatectomy and radiotherapy, which between them have left me with a very overactive bladder (OAB) and moderately heavy urinary incontinence, but at least I am free of pain and the consequences of OAB can be managed.
But it's all about keeping everything thing in perspective. The bigger picture is that, once you know you've started to skid that bit faster down life's slippery slope, all of a sudden life seems so much more fun, and you seem to know how to make the most of it that much more.
I'm therefore solely focused on looking forward to several more years of relatively normal, happy life!