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An English man in france

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User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 01:52

Hi,

I’m Chris I’m English but now live in France. Unfortunately I speak very little french and understand even less and as far as I can gather there aren’t any groups I can join to help me.

I recently had routine blood tests for my medication and my PSA level came back quite high, I have been having symptoms that something isn’t quite right, having to get up several times in the night, not able to pee properly, pain when peeing etc… I just put it down to “just one of those things”

My doctor then referred me to a urologist, he examined me and informed me my prostate was enlarged, I then had a cystoprophy that was clear, then an MRI which came back as PIRADS 4.

Today I had a biopsy but the results won’t be back until January 4th 23…. Now I’m worried sick but don’t want to show it to my wife and family.

Im hoping I can find some help during this waiting period, someone to chat with even tho I know this charity is UK based and the fact I now live in France.

User
Posted 23 Dec 2022 at 20:24

Cancer support France is an anglophone charity based in France. They will talk to you. So will I. I live in Herault and am recently been diagnosed. Contact me if you want to have a chat. 

User
Posted 24 Dec 2022 at 14:19
CB!!!! Great to see you pop up - I hope all is well?
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

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User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 09:35
Tricky but if I was your wife I would be really p****d off if you hadn't told me.

The waiting is tough but it's a process we have to go through whatever the result, double tough it's over Xmas.

My advice tell your wife, don't tell the kids, fingers crossed it's an infection, BPH or anything that can be wrong with a prostate that isn't cancer!

User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 09:52

Waiting for test results is, for most men, the hardest part of the entire process. There's nothing to do but just get through it one day at a time. I would strongly suggest that you do not consult "Doctor Google!" I agree with francij1's earlier post; share it with your wife: a problem shared, and all that. What was your PSA level?

Best wishes,

Chris

User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 11:36
My husband (since 39 years), who had cystoprostatectomy last 12th August for bladder cancer, told me immediately in May that he found two drops of blood in urine. We were always together for further investigations. First we talked about it only with our older daughter. When we received diagnosis after biopsy we announced the terrible new to the others.

You have to discuss with your wife, absolutely. Probably it will be a shock. Nevertheless you are married for better or for worse. If you keep silent about MRI results, in the future she will always think you are hiding something from her. I would also suggest to wait until January 4th 23 for your children.

The best help you can get is from your wife, believe me.

I'm French but there is not such a group in France, unfortunately.

If you need a second medical consultation you can contact "Clinique Saint-Augustin" in Bordeaux (where are you living ?)

User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 13:09

I have told my wife, she has been to all my appointments with me and she’s the one keeping positive, I don’t want to spoil her positivity by showing my worry. I suppose that’s the reason for joining this group, to unload my thoughts to others who are or who have been in a similar position .

 

User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 13:17
You may wish to change your username to something other than your full name, Chris. This is a public website and anyone can read it.

What was your PSA? You don't say on your profile and it's helpful to know.

Best wishes,

Chris

User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 14:20
Sorry, I understood you did not tell your wife (my poor English...). It is certain that your wife feels your anxiety and that she does not dare to broach the subject so as not to make you more anxious. When my husband was diagnosed with invasive bladder cancer, we both decided to only consider the next step (1-2 weeks) and refused to look months ahead.We met very close friends, made a trip to the mountains. We went to restaurants and movies much more often than usual, even though neither he nor I wanted to go out before we left.
User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 15:14

Chris, I think we  thought you had not told your wife. Will worrying about your result help you , I doubt it ,so don't worry about. If the biopsy indicates you have cancer, then there are lots of options to deal with it. Be positive. I did convince myself that my  biopsy would be negative, unfortunately it wasn't but eight years on I am still here. She may be having her own worries and would perhaps like to share them with you.

Thanks Chris 

 

User
Posted 17 Dec 2022 at 23:36
There may not be a support group in France but they have very good treatment there. Try to get a full report of your diagnosis and enter it under your Profile/Bio so we have a better idea of where you are. A large Prostate means you can expect an increased PSA range for your age regardless of whether you have some cancer in it.
Barry
User
Posted 18 Dec 2022 at 08:02
Sorry you had to join the group.

All my initial treatment was in France, but if I remember from the delay I had between diagnosis and Surgery was because the system closes down for The Season and January Skiing!

I had excellent treatment from Oncology at Angers (49) very thorough.

Make sure you keep all your results as you are the filing system.

Chris.

User
Posted 23 Dec 2022 at 20:24

Cancer support France is an anglophone charity based in France. They will talk to you. So will I. I live in Herault and am recently been diagnosed. Contact me if you want to have a chat. 

User
Posted 24 Dec 2022 at 13:03

Someone to chat with?

Nurses from this site?

Others via WhatsApp or Skype?

A friend of mine in South west France has similar issues to you, he's waiting tests.  He's 64, we chat.

You aren't alone, there is always someone, there is always support.

atb

dave

All we can do - is do all that we can.

So, do all you can to help yourself, then make the best of your time. :-)

I am the statistic.

User
Posted 24 Dec 2022 at 14:19
CB!!!! Great to see you pop up - I hope all is well?
"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 25 Dec 2022 at 00:38
Morning Lyn et al, and happy Christmas. all good here.

CG - worrying at your stage is understandable. From me 9yrs 7 months ahead of you, life is great. Yours will be.

atb

dave

All we can do - is do all that we can.

So, do all you can to help yourself, then make the best of your time. :-)

I am the statistic.

User
Posted 27 Dec 2022 at 14:43

My PSA was 6.5 

User
Posted 27 Dec 2022 at 14:51

Hi Chris,

took your advice and changed my profile name…. My PSA level was 6.5

 
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