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Personality Changes for those operated on.

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User
Posted 31 Jan 2023 at 19:56

Was doing research on my husband's (age 77) mood swings, anger, irritability and prostate cancer surgery.  He has been cancer free (PSA after operation 0) for over 13 years.  He said his doctor had told him that an area that was cut into in the operation would change his personality.  And then it's happened.  From a happy, smiling man who never was upset, he's become increasingly moody, angry, pounding fists at times, bad tempered, whiny which has been quite a shock.  This transformation took place right after the operation and has steadily progressed as time has passed.  He still gets a PSA test yearly and not it's bi-yearly even though his numbers are excellent but he continues to worry each and every time.  I saw a post on this site from 2017 where someone was asking the same questions about a friend of theirs whose personality changed drastically after 5 years.  I should also mention my brother-in-law had prostate cancer and has been free of it for over 15 years as have his neighbours, so there is excellent recovery from this.  I should also mention that i read the book by the 'founder' of PSA who says it's being used in the wrong way, and he - himself never gets his PSA taken nor does he advise anyone he knows to have it taken either.  So that, in itself is puzzling.  Looking for others who've noticed personality changes in their spouses.

User
Posted 01 Feb 2023 at 00:41

I'm glad to hear about those who are doing well, this forum is swayed towards those with problems. You're right PSA testing is good for monitoring cancer, as a diagnosis tool it is questionable.

I cannot think how the physical cutting aspect of the operation can change a personality. The side effects post-treatment yes, that nearly always has psychological effect. Anxiety near PSA tests is also very common.

Quite a few on this website speak highly of counseling so it might be worth looking into that, or possibly anti depressant medication. The other thing to consider is, is this definitely cancer related? I know it was first noticed post op, but dementia is also noted for these progressive personality changes. We tend to blame every ache and pain on cancer, but don't be blind to looking elsewhere.

Dave

User
Posted 01 Feb 2023 at 01:15
Sorry D - unless he had his testicles removed sometime after they took out his prostate, he has spun you a line and is using that as an excuse to bully and treat you badly. Some would describe this as gaslighting - I would be more inclined to call it domestic abuse. There is nothing removed in a prostatectomy that changes people's personalities. Presumably you have noticed that your brother-in-law and neighbours are not going around being aggressive?

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 01 Feb 2023 at 07:50
Loss of sexual prowess, ejaculate, ability to father children are all impacted by prostatectomy.

Pretty sure changes like that can impact your confidence and general happiness as a bloke.

Getting a strop on and being whiny isn't domestic abuse so maybe that is a leap to far Lyn. Being a grumpy old b****** could be related the loss of confidence related to masculinity changes or just the fact he is getting old and has little to fulfill him generally.

This forum is full of women who are not happy with the impact of RP on their relationship.

Surgeons say all sorts of dodgy half truths and because they are primadona's no one challenges them.

 
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