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Going Out

User
Posted 29 Dec 2023 at 20:06

This might sound like a silly question, but I have always been a grower not a shower, so when not erect, there isn't much to see.  Now after the RARP there is even less.  I have always had a shy bladder which I think might not be much of an issue post surgery, but when going out, how do you manage.  There is not a lot to hold on to and being uncircumcised, if I am not careful, my sprinkler in the garden has more accuracy.  I was just wondering if anyone has any suggestions.  We are going to a New Year event this weekend and the toilets are public.  Getting quite worked up about this.

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 09:52

Soon after surgery I had the same problem, I used to do what Adrian has suggested. Hopefully your penis will recover as mine did. Are you using a vacuum pump for rehabilitation?

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 19 Jan 2024 at 14:31

Hi Basket,

8 weeks since RARP.

I'm in the same canoe. Grower not a shower. And now after RARP my todger resembles an acorn in a bird's nest. 😡

I now sit to take a pee as I was getting tired of cleaning the toilet bowl and surrounding floor.

I'm lucky as I'm 95% continent, but useless at aiming, and only use the ultra-thin, No:1 Tena for men. However, when sneezing, coughing or farting I make sure they are carried out with due care & attention. 😉

I'm going to have to look into some form of pump-action. 

Try not to stress too much mate, & get out as much as you can. (Easy for me to say).

You are not on your own. 

All the best,

-Taps14

Edited by member 20 Jan 2024 at 09:05  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 09:24

Hello again mate.

If you're really struggling you could use a cubicle and pee seated.

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 09:51

I would ask if you can get a pump. There do seem to be some who have managed to regain their length this way. Unless you're already getting regular natural erections, you should be starting on penile rehab anyway, to maintain penile tissue which needs regular erections to remain healhy.

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 16:30
Have a word with your GP who should prescribe you a pump

With RT I suffered very much urgency and frequency. I used a 'Conveen' system whereby a sheath is placed over the Penis and connects by tube to a bag which has a valve enabling you to empty when the opportunity arises. This proved particularly useful on long journeys. Gradually my function improved until I no longer needed the system. I used free sample bags, tubes and retainers from Conveen and my GP made arrangements to supply Conveen sheaths from my local pharmacy. (They came in 3 sizes by the way). I don't know if Conveen still supply free samples or NHS GP's would still facilitate getting a supply of free sheathes but worth a try, otherwise worth paying out.

Barry
User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 00:53

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
To start with you can get a cheap pump from an online sex shop to see if it helps before spending your money on a medical grade one.

I did that, and it was really uncomfortable and put me off. I probably wouldn't have done any better with the medical one if I hadn't had a pump clinic session to demo it on me and show me how to use it.

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 00:53

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Have a word with your GP who should prescribe you a pump

He's not in the UK.

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 17:38

Fear not we get members from all over the world. We have never drummed anyone out. I think this forum is more active than a lot of others, so attracts more members, which creates a self fulfilling prophecy.

The only issue is that, you will nearly always get advice based on NHS practice.

Dave

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 21:54

I strongly recommend a battery operated one - very much easier to use. The handle and the associated mechanism does not last very long.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 17:11

Just realized I forgot to update this post.  We did go out for a christmas meal and I felt I needed to go to the loo.  By the time I had stood up and got there, I had finished weeing and it was running down my leg.  Fortunately I was wearing black jeans.  Changed and threw away that pair of depends and went back to the table.  A little later decided to do a preemptive evacuation so excused myself, stood up and walked briskly to the loo.  Again, same thing, soaked pair of undies and running down my leg.  Fortunately I travel with three or four additional pairs and another friend at the table is doing much better than me post RARP and he also carries spares.  So it wasn't the best of outings but I tried to make the best of it.  Regarding the pump, I purchased one "Morpheus" from a medical supplier $399 plus tax.  I have tried it once, and it was stunningly painful.  I haven't used it since, but I will once I pick up the courage.

I have been out and about a few times since, but in general for the time being I am more of a home body.  I do go and get breakfast sometimes because early in the day, things are much better than they are in the afternoon and evening.

 

Richard

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 17:19

Hello again mate, thanks for the update.

Its still very early days, and you're doing fine. 

Adrian

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 19:39

Richard. Sorry to hear you had a 'damp' Christmas. Probably a silly question but were you wearing a large incontinence pad when it happened? As Adrian says it is still early days and for some of us progress can be frustratingly slow. I have only used a hand operated vacuum erect device, so controlling a tolerable level of vacuum is straight forward. I'm not sure how easy that is with an electric pump. 

User
Posted 19 Jan 2024 at 14:41

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

I'm in the same canoe. Grower not a shower. And now after RARP my todger resembles an acorn in a bird's nest. 😡

😆

Nice one, and welcome to the forum mate. 

I can remember, after RARP looking under the sheets, and thinking they've given me a sex change by mistake!

User
Posted 20 Jan 2024 at 10:04

Hi Steve

When my first handle-operated VED broke, I changed to a battery operated one (not cheap but quite robust and very easy to use). I find it very controllable and it has a button to release the vacuum (your pump has one I guess).  It is best not to pump to enthusiastically and as you know there is a risk of pulling in the loose skin around the scrotum into the cylinder which can be uncomfortable. This is why until you get used to it  best to stop and restart making sure that you pull the loose skin away from the base of the vacuum cylinder. Regular use of the pump and gradually increasing the size of your penis over a period of weeks will help it towards your pre-surgery size. I was lucky that I hadn't lost a significant length due to my prostatectomy. It is a pity that some men are not advised to use a medical grade VED (such as Somaerect - NHS prescribed) as soon as they are well enough and able to after the catheter is removed.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

Show Most Thanked Posts
User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 09:24

Hello again mate.

If you're really struggling you could use a cubicle and pee seated.

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 09:51

I would ask if you can get a pump. There do seem to be some who have managed to regain their length this way. Unless you're already getting regular natural erections, you should be starting on penile rehab anyway, to maintain penile tissue which needs regular erections to remain healhy.

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 09:52

Soon after surgery I had the same problem, I used to do what Adrian has suggested. Hopefully your penis will recover as mine did. Are you using a vacuum pump for rehabilitation?

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 15:52
I am planning on getting a pump, but it is not covered by health insurance. We will see if it helps at all.

Thanks for the replies.

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 16:08

To start with you can get a cheap pump from an online sex shop to see if it helps before spending your money on a medical grade one.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 30 Dec 2023 at 16:30
Have a word with your GP who should prescribe you a pump

With RT I suffered very much urgency and frequency. I used a 'Conveen' system whereby a sheath is placed over the Penis and connects by tube to a bag which has a valve enabling you to empty when the opportunity arises. This proved particularly useful on long journeys. Gradually my function improved until I no longer needed the system. I used free sample bags, tubes and retainers from Conveen and my GP made arrangements to supply Conveen sheaths from my local pharmacy. (They came in 3 sizes by the way). I don't know if Conveen still supply free samples or NHS GP's would still facilitate getting a supply of free sheathes but worth a try, otherwise worth paying out.

Barry
User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 00:53

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
To start with you can get a cheap pump from an online sex shop to see if it helps before spending your money on a medical grade one.

I did that, and it was really uncomfortable and put me off. I probably wouldn't have done any better with the medical one if I hadn't had a pump clinic session to demo it on me and show me how to use it.

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 00:53

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Have a word with your GP who should prescribe you a pump

He's not in the UK.

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 01:51

My mistake, I usually read Profiles before replying but omitted to do so on this occasion.

Barry
User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 16:57

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Have a word with your GP who should prescribe you a pump

He's not in the UK.

 

Andy62, yes, and I hope that is ok with the group.  I am originally from Haywards Heath in Sussex, but now live in Virginia, about 20 miles outside Washington DC.  The reason I joined this support group was that (apologies if I offend), I find the English humor and honesty so very refreshing compared to that over here.   I also find it easier to talk openly to people from the UK.  I am hopeful that not being there will not get me kicked off the board.  BTW, I am ordering a medical grade pump, not sure whether to get a mechanical or electric one though.  My urologist said that I should get one since the Corpus Cavernosum will start to degrade if I don't start some rehab soon.  He also advised that this is not related to ED, but to health and blood supply.

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 17:38

Fear not we get members from all over the world. We have never drummed anyone out. I think this forum is more active than a lot of others, so attracts more members, which creates a self fulfilling prophecy.

The only issue is that, you will nearly always get advice based on NHS practice.

Dave

User
Posted 31 Dec 2023 at 21:54

I strongly recommend a battery operated one - very much easier to use. The handle and the associated mechanism does not last very long.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 17:11

Just realized I forgot to update this post.  We did go out for a christmas meal and I felt I needed to go to the loo.  By the time I had stood up and got there, I had finished weeing and it was running down my leg.  Fortunately I was wearing black jeans.  Changed and threw away that pair of depends and went back to the table.  A little later decided to do a preemptive evacuation so excused myself, stood up and walked briskly to the loo.  Again, same thing, soaked pair of undies and running down my leg.  Fortunately I travel with three or four additional pairs and another friend at the table is doing much better than me post RARP and he also carries spares.  So it wasn't the best of outings but I tried to make the best of it.  Regarding the pump, I purchased one "Morpheus" from a medical supplier $399 plus tax.  I have tried it once, and it was stunningly painful.  I haven't used it since, but I will once I pick up the courage.

I have been out and about a few times since, but in general for the time being I am more of a home body.  I do go and get breakfast sometimes because early in the day, things are much better than they are in the afternoon and evening.

 

Richard

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 17:19

Hello again mate, thanks for the update.

Its still very early days, and you're doing fine. 

Adrian

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 19:39

Richard. Sorry to hear you had a 'damp' Christmas. Probably a silly question but were you wearing a large incontinence pad when it happened? As Adrian says it is still early days and for some of us progress can be frustratingly slow. I have only used a hand operated vacuum erect device, so controlling a tolerable level of vacuum is straight forward. I'm not sure how easy that is with an electric pump. 

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 19:45
I had the same experience when I visited my son and girlfriend in their new house. I went for a pee thinking I was peeing into the bowl only to discover I had peed down the front of my trousers! Mortified, managed to cover it up and left early. I use a pump successfully but found that my grower is determined to remain a grower, so the peeing hasn't improved. When out I pee sitting down and push him down vertical or the pee will shoot out under the seat. When home I pee through a toilet roll, yeah crazy but I don't care, works for me.
User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 19:53

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
When out I pee sitting down and push him down vertical or the pee will shoot out under the seat. When home I pee through a toilet roll, yeah crazy but I don't care, works for me.

Hi Jerry.

There's nowt worse than the dreaded spraying, when over 50%, misses the bowl. I felt obliged to buy the wife a new Vileda. 🙂

I think one guy on here, adapted an empty silicone tube,  peeing out of the nozzle end to direct the flow.  

Edited by member 17 Jan 2024 at 05:16  | Reason: Reduce text

User
Posted 16 Jan 2024 at 23:30

ChrisBroms, I was wearing Depends.  They are absorbent pad containing disposable underwear.  I was really surprised they leaked so badly, normally if that happens it means I should have changed them earlier.  Definitely dampened my enthusiasm that night.

User
Posted 19 Jan 2024 at 14:31

Hi Basket,

8 weeks since RARP.

I'm in the same canoe. Grower not a shower. And now after RARP my todger resembles an acorn in a bird's nest. 😡

I now sit to take a pee as I was getting tired of cleaning the toilet bowl and surrounding floor.

I'm lucky as I'm 95% continent, but useless at aiming, and only use the ultra-thin, No:1 Tena for men. However, when sneezing, coughing or farting I make sure they are carried out with due care & attention. 😉

I'm going to have to look into some form of pump-action. 

Try not to stress too much mate, & get out as much as you can. (Easy for me to say).

You are not on your own. 

All the best,

-Taps14

Edited by member 20 Jan 2024 at 09:05  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 19 Jan 2024 at 14:41

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

I'm in the same canoe. Grower not a shower. And now after RARP my todger resembles an acorn in a bird's nest. 😡

😆

Nice one, and welcome to the forum mate. 

I can remember, after RARP looking under the sheets, and thinking they've given me a sex change by mistake!

User
Posted 19 Jan 2024 at 14:54

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

😆

Nice one, and welcome to the forum mate. 

I can remember, after RARP looking under the sheets, and thinking they've given me a sex change by mistake!

👍

Thanks for the welcome A.

Edited by member 19 Jan 2024 at 14:56  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 19 Jan 2024 at 20:28
On the VED front, I have a manual cheap one from Temu which is manually controlled. When I use it, I start with low pressure just to pull my tiny todger into the tube and leave it for a minute to start to grow. Then a few more pumps to apply some vacuum.

There is a tendency to overpump to see if we can get it back to the pre-op size and that is a mistake - it can become very painful. So I wonder if the battery automatic ones are just applying too much vacuum and are thus quite painful at the beginning.

User
Posted 20 Jan 2024 at 10:04

Hi Steve

When my first handle-operated VED broke, I changed to a battery operated one (not cheap but quite robust and very easy to use). I find it very controllable and it has a button to release the vacuum (your pump has one I guess).  It is best not to pump to enthusiastically and as you know there is a risk of pulling in the loose skin around the scrotum into the cylinder which can be uncomfortable. This is why until you get used to it  best to stop and restart making sure that you pull the loose skin away from the base of the vacuum cylinder. Regular use of the pump and gradually increasing the size of your penis over a period of weeks will help it towards your pre-surgery size. I was lucky that I hadn't lost a significant length due to my prostatectomy. It is a pity that some men are not advised to use a medical grade VED (such as Somaerect - NHS prescribed) as soon as they are well enough and able to after the catheter is removed.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

 
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