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Bit of positivity

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User
Posted 17 Feb 2025 at 19:12

Just wanted to share a bit of positivity after husbands urology app today. Catheter (which he had become a little attached to!) finally removed having had it in since Sept. He described going to the loo on his own as better than sex (not sure how to take that!) Obviously very early days and we have to keep an eye on things but PSA now down to 1.4 from 14 again, since Sept. Shows that the Abi might be having some effect which is reassuring. We have asked for another scan before April oncology app.


Still trying to get our heads around the ‘incurable’ G9 label but for the first time in weeks felt more positive leaving the hospital as opposed to in despair. Very hard for husband to sit beside two other gentleman older than him both discussing their benign situation. Could feel his thoughts of ‘why couldn’t that have been me’.  On a positive he’s trading his car in for a van and we’re going to do some travelling around the country with the dog apparently! Never been a dream of mine but at this stage if he wanted to paint his face purple for happiness I couldn’t care less!! X

User
Posted 17 Feb 2025 at 19:12

Just wanted to share a bit of positivity after husbands urology app today. Catheter (which he had become a little attached to!) finally removed having had it in since Sept. He described going to the loo on his own as better than sex (not sure how to take that!) Obviously very early days and we have to keep an eye on things but PSA now down to 1.4 from 14 again, since Sept. Shows that the Abi might be having some effect which is reassuring. We have asked for another scan before April oncology app.


Still trying to get our heads around the ‘incurable’ G9 label but for the first time in weeks felt more positive leaving the hospital as opposed to in despair. Very hard for husband to sit beside two other gentleman older than him both discussing their benign situation. Could feel his thoughts of ‘why couldn’t that have been me’.  On a positive he’s trading his car in for a van and we’re going to do some travelling around the country with the dog apparently! Never been a dream of mine but at this stage if he wanted to paint his face purple for happiness I couldn’t care less!! X

User
Posted 17 Feb 2025 at 23:58

Thank you for the update. Its great that the Abi is proving effective and that you are feeling more positive. I hope you both have a great time touring in the van.👍

User
Posted 18 Feb 2025 at 07:57

Always good to hear about positivity, it really helps you on your journey.


When you’re faced with your own mortality I think it really changes your outlook on life. Chris Hoy’s inspirational words ring constantly in my ears ‘If there’s something your planning on doing in the future JUST DO IT NOW!’
I’m just in the process of booking my second cruise for this year. I never thought I would book one let alone two…but I’m just going for it and having as much fun as I can whilst I can.


so enjoy the van, have lots of fun although I would maybe wait until the weather warms up a bit before trying it out🥶🥶🥶🥶


All the best to both if you,


Derek

User
Posted 18 Feb 2025 at 08:17

Thanks for sharing your positive news. 


Good luck travelling around in the van, it sounds like fun and I'm sure you'll enjoy all your new adventures in and out of it.


Good luck, 


Kev.

User
Posted 24 Mar 2026 at 21:56

So it’s been a fair old while since I’ve posted. Been another year of living with husband’s stage 4 prostate cancer. Had to come off the Abi unfortunately as his liver function just couldn’t tolerate it. Now on Enzalutamide and three monthly hormone injections. Oncology every three months and so far every time PSA is still undetectable. The rollercoaster ride and breath holding starts about a week before the appointment is due and once the appointment’s been attended the temporary reprieve makes you feel able to breathe again for a little bit until it’s time to get back on again. Not going to lie, I’m exhausted but stick on the happy face for him and the kids as much as I can. Looking forward to the better weather and hopefully some trips in the van. Hope everyone doing alright X

User
Posted 25 Mar 2026 at 19:26

I’m so sorry to read your wife is now unwell Adrian, after every thing you’ve both been through- life’s a b****. I’m with you about it being harder to deal with your partners illness than your own.


I’m lucky and haven’t got anything wrong, but in the last 12 years we’ve had to deal with his three hip replacements, blocked artery in heart caused by family history, high blood pressure and cholesterol, atrial fibrillation (2 unsuccessful treatments) and then 2 week cancer pathways for blood in urine, then blood in poo, and now waiting to see if he has prostate cancer. Been lucky on first two pathways (blood thinners and diverticulitis blamed) but can’t see it being third time lucky! it’s so very hard as a partner and a Mum to a daughter who adores her Dad. Hopefully your wife gets sorted soon 🙏 xx

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User
Posted 17 Feb 2025 at 23:58

Thank you for the update. Its great that the Abi is proving effective and that you are feeling more positive. I hope you both have a great time touring in the van.👍

User
Posted 18 Feb 2025 at 07:57

Always good to hear about positivity, it really helps you on your journey.


When you’re faced with your own mortality I think it really changes your outlook on life. Chris Hoy’s inspirational words ring constantly in my ears ‘If there’s something your planning on doing in the future JUST DO IT NOW!’
I’m just in the process of booking my second cruise for this year. I never thought I would book one let alone two…but I’m just going for it and having as much fun as I can whilst I can.


so enjoy the van, have lots of fun although I would maybe wait until the weather warms up a bit before trying it out🥶🥶🥶🥶


All the best to both if you,


Derek

User
Posted 18 Feb 2025 at 08:17

Thanks for sharing your positive news. 


Good luck travelling around in the van, it sounds like fun and I'm sure you'll enjoy all your new adventures in and out of it.


Good luck, 


Kev.

User
Posted 18 Feb 2025 at 18:44

It definitely does change your outlook. I’ve always thought of myself as quite a patient, kind person but negatively have found my tolerance for unnecessary bullsh** at an all time low! 


Will definitely wait for better weather before venturing in the van! Husband has also suggested a cruise, we’ll see. Great to hear you’re planning a second Decho. Have a great time. Thanks to Kev and Adrian for the best wishes. We’ll see where the road takes us! X

User
Posted 24 Mar 2026 at 21:56

So it’s been a fair old while since I’ve posted. Been another year of living with husband’s stage 4 prostate cancer. Had to come off the Abi unfortunately as his liver function just couldn’t tolerate it. Now on Enzalutamide and three monthly hormone injections. Oncology every three months and so far every time PSA is still undetectable. The rollercoaster ride and breath holding starts about a week before the appointment is due and once the appointment’s been attended the temporary reprieve makes you feel able to breathe again for a little bit until it’s time to get back on again. Not going to lie, I’m exhausted but stick on the happy face for him and the kids as much as I can. Looking forward to the better weather and hopefully some trips in the van. Hope everyone doing alright X

User
Posted 24 Mar 2026 at 23:28

You're not alone on that rollercoaster.  Start planning the van trips and anything else you can. Better weather is on the way. Make the most of it.

User
Posted 25 Mar 2026 at 10:16

Hello, again.


I truly admire your resolve. I can't imagine how difficult and tiring it must be to have to continually put on a brave face to help the rest of the family. I hope that you're managing to devote sometime to yourself.


Unfortunately my wife has recently been diagnosised with a serious medical issue. I am finding it much harder to deal with her ill health than my own. It's much easier to cope with your own health problems than seeing a loved one suffer and the impact it has on  the family.


I hope that the sunshine brightens things up and that you can have lots of quality time together.


Look after yourself as best you can. X

Edited by member 25 Mar 2026 at 10:20  | Reason: Additional text

User
Posted 25 Mar 2026 at 19:26

I’m so sorry to read your wife is now unwell Adrian, after every thing you’ve both been through- life’s a b****. I’m with you about it being harder to deal with your partners illness than your own.


I’m lucky and haven’t got anything wrong, but in the last 12 years we’ve had to deal with his three hip replacements, blocked artery in heart caused by family history, high blood pressure and cholesterol, atrial fibrillation (2 unsuccessful treatments) and then 2 week cancer pathways for blood in urine, then blood in poo, and now waiting to see if he has prostate cancer. Been lucky on first two pathways (blood thinners and diverticulitis blamed) but can’t see it being third time lucky! it’s so very hard as a partner and a Mum to a daughter who adores her Dad. Hopefully your wife gets sorted soon 🙏 xx

User
Posted 26 Mar 2026 at 22:42

Really sorry to hear that Adrian. Thanks for your message. Life has a habit of kicking you in the arse then poking you in the eye for good measure! I hope you are able to support each other the best you can X

 
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