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Newly diagnosed with incurable PC

User
Posted 03 Jul 2025 at 08:22

Hello, yesterday we found out that my partner has advanced metastatic PC, he is 56 and had very little symptoms. 

Initial PSA of 134 prompted a bone scan and from that he has been diagnosed and started on Degarelix.

We are now waiting to meet with Oncology and he is still to have MRI and biopsies to confirm staging etc. 

I did ask if we needed all the other tests to confirm, however, the Urologist promptly said no, based on PSA, bone scan and DRE, there is no doubting his diagnosis, we are just unclear on spread to lymph glands etc. 

Prognosis is 5-10 years, maybe more, quite vague but I understand treatments are changing all the time. 

I feel really numb, I don't know what to expect, I just want to make sure I support Paul as best as I can.....this is all still sinking in. Is there anyone here in similar situation who can offer advice? It's really helpful reading some of the posts on this forum. 

Wishing everyone who unfortunately find themselves here the very best❤️

 

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 07:54

Polly,

Very sorry to hear about your partners diagnosis at such a young age.

I can understand your concern about tests not being done. I would have thought that thorough testing was essential to properly diagnose people.

My older brother has just been told he has PCa based on a PSA level of 89 and a DRE.  No MRI scan and before he even had a biopsy. The urologist just said based on my experience you have cancer. 

I was a collisions investigation expert and if I had looked at an injured pedestrian and said " based on my experience you've been hit by a vehicle" I'd be hounded out of the profession; could have been a car, a truck, fallen from a tree, assaulted etc.

It just seems to be very hit and miss with consultants and MDTs making decisions with very little explanation or oversight. 

I truly hope that you and your partner have a happy future together and the way you are facing this horrendous diagnosis shows you are setting about things the right way.

Take care, Mick 

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 07:56
Hi Polly, all good advice above and you have done the right thing joining here. My OH was diagnosed in 2022 at PSA 290, with G9 Tb3 N1 and now M1 but he is much older at nearly 80 and they assumed immediatley he would have prostate cancer. I have all details on my profile. Keep asking questions when you get to Oncology. And good luck. The waitiing is pretty hard but I have settled in to the process supporting my OH and getting really good support from this community.
User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 08:28

Thanks Schubert......i have had a read of your profile, sounds like you and your partner have been on quite a journey❤️.....the waiting is awful, I am armed with lots of questions for our first appt with Oncology, hoping for some positive news, my partner will have also had his first psa check since starting HT, we think its working as all his bone pain has gone🤞🏻

 

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 20:25

Diagnostic tests should only be done if they're clinically significant, which means the results will guide some subsequent actions. A biopsy is part of the diagnostic process, confirming cancer found in the prostate, and giving a Gleason score (a measure of aggressiveness and hence how likely/quickly it is to spread). If the PSA is high and spread can be seen on scans, then the biopsy isn't going to tell you much you don't already know. It is also sometimes used for genetic testing, but that tends to impact treatments further down the line, so might not be relevant yet - they will do a biopsy if/when they want to know this if you haven't already had one.

Sorry for what you're going through. It's oncology who will decide on things like chemo and Abiraterone (or other equivalent drug). I wouldn't necessarily take much notice of what a urology nurse says about this.

By the way, if he finds the Degarelix injections are an issue, there is a daily tablet equivalent, Relugolix/Orgovyx (different drug, but works the same way).

Sorry for what the two of you are going through. You should get some good support here.

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 21:27

Hi.

I think, somewhere, but I cant find it, that your fella had a CT scan which showed nodules on his lungs. You were a bit concerned about these.

It rang bells with me. I dug out a copy of my CT scan it mentioned 'a 6mm nodule in the upper lobe of my right lung and numerous tiny nodules in both lung fields which were indeterminate' ???

It mentioned that my oesophagus appeared collapsed???

It mentioned that some of the bowel loops appeared collapsed. There also appear to be some changes of divertcular disease. Possibility of focal lesions/abnormalities cannot be exluded in the unprepared colon. Clinical correlation is advised???

It mentioned scattered lytic looking areas in pelvic bones and the femoral. These are indeterminate???

My CT scan read as bad as the last MOT on my clapped out car. 😁 

Soon after I had a bone scan which showed mid cervical spine activity consistent with degenerative change??? But fortunately concluded no scintigraphic features of skeletal metastatic disease.

Three years later, I've heard nothing about the lung nodules or the colon lesions. I'm hoping they are not cancerous.

I've still not been told what the holes or lytic areas in my bones were.

I've googled lung nodules they are common and usually benign. I've not researched the colon problem, but recently had a bowel cancer 'through the post' test, which came back negative.

I'm putting the bone problems, which sometimes ache like hell, as some sort of arthritis.

As for my collapsed oesophagus, I'm still eating and drinking okay.

I'm struggling enough with confirmed PCa, to push for follow ups on other likely disorders. 😁

The only reason I've posted this is to warn others that CT scans, aren't limited to prostate problems. They can reveal a myriad of other possible health issues.

Edited by member 25 Jul 2025 at 09:00  | Reason: Typo and additional text

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 22:04

You can request copies of scan results, biopsies etc. I think it's a good idea because you get so much information it can become confusing. Good luck, you're certainly due some.🤞

 

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User
Posted 03 Jul 2025 at 09:43

Hi Polly.

I'm so sorry to here that your husband has been diagnosed with metastatic disease. I send you both a big hug.

There are folk on here dealing with a similar diagnosis. I'm sure that they'll help and support you. The specialist nurses may also be able to to advise and guide you.

 

User
Posted 03 Jul 2025 at 23:39
Best advice I can offer is do your own research targeting similar cases to your partner and what the most effective treatment is NOW.

Double check everything your medical team recommend and don't assume they know best, they are often out of date and stuck in "treatment ruts".

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 06:59

Updated profile🙂

My partner has had a call about his CT results from a specialist prostate nurse, thankfully he recorded the call and sent it across to me.....results show NO spread to lymph nodes which we are surprised but happy about, noticed a small nodule on his lung but advised this is nothing to worry about. No biopsies to be taken, not sure how we feel about this, sounds like they reckon its bad enough and biopsies wont confirm anything else relevant🤷🏻‍♀️

Case now to be handed over to Oncology, appt on 27th August, 2 days before 3rd Degarelix injection. My partner asked the nurse about chemo, nurse said that he didnt think this would be an option, however, best to wait for Oncology, he also said that they might want to add Abireratone into the mix. Nurse just said that "we wouldn't usually use chemo in a case like yours".....

I have read that chemo can be ineffective if there are only bone mets as its more targeted at soft tissue, lymph spread etc.

I know there are many men who have been treated with HT alone, we are still really upbeat and positive! Plan on living our best lives for as long as possible! 💪🏻

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 07:54

Polly,

Very sorry to hear about your partners diagnosis at such a young age.

I can understand your concern about tests not being done. I would have thought that thorough testing was essential to properly diagnose people.

My older brother has just been told he has PCa based on a PSA level of 89 and a DRE.  No MRI scan and before he even had a biopsy. The urologist just said based on my experience you have cancer. 

I was a collisions investigation expert and if I had looked at an injured pedestrian and said " based on my experience you've been hit by a vehicle" I'd be hounded out of the profession; could have been a car, a truck, fallen from a tree, assaulted etc.

It just seems to be very hit and miss with consultants and MDTs making decisions with very little explanation or oversight. 

I truly hope that you and your partner have a happy future together and the way you are facing this horrendous diagnosis shows you are setting about things the right way.

Take care, Mick 

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 07:56
Hi Polly, all good advice above and you have done the right thing joining here. My OH was diagnosed in 2022 at PSA 290, with G9 Tb3 N1 and now M1 but he is much older at nearly 80 and they assumed immediatley he would have prostate cancer. I have all details on my profile. Keep asking questions when you get to Oncology. And good luck. The waitiing is pretty hard but I have settled in to the process supporting my OH and getting really good support from this community.
User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 08:20

Hi Mick, thanks for your reply. It is all a bit strange how different tests are offered in different cases.....I guess we have had a bone and CT scan, we know he has spread to more than 4 bones, perhaps the biopsy is an unnecessary risk in this case🤷🏻‍♀️.....I have lots of questions to ask at our appt on the 27th August🙂

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 08:28

Thanks Schubert......i have had a read of your profile, sounds like you and your partner have been on quite a journey❤️.....the waiting is awful, I am armed with lots of questions for our first appt with Oncology, hoping for some positive news, my partner will have also had his first psa check since starting HT, we think its working as all his bone pain has gone🤞🏻

 

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 20:25

Diagnostic tests should only be done if they're clinically significant, which means the results will guide some subsequent actions. A biopsy is part of the diagnostic process, confirming cancer found in the prostate, and giving a Gleason score (a measure of aggressiveness and hence how likely/quickly it is to spread). If the PSA is high and spread can be seen on scans, then the biopsy isn't going to tell you much you don't already know. It is also sometimes used for genetic testing, but that tends to impact treatments further down the line, so might not be relevant yet - they will do a biopsy if/when they want to know this if you haven't already had one.

Sorry for what you're going through. It's oncology who will decide on things like chemo and Abiraterone (or other equivalent drug). I wouldn't necessarily take much notice of what a urology nurse says about this.

By the way, if he finds the Degarelix injections are an issue, there is a daily tablet equivalent, Relugolix/Orgovyx (different drug, but works the same way).

Sorry for what the two of you are going through. You should get some good support here.

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 20:36

Thanks Andy, I think some of it is down to our lack of knowledge, impatience and believing that we must be offered all treatments going, kinda feels like fight mode, want to do anything to stop the worst from happening. 

We have had good care so far, we will ask lots of questions at our Oncology appt.....sometimes its good to take a step back, take on board what has been said and let that sink in before deciding on next course of action. 

I think my partner will be pretty happy not to have the biopsies😂

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 21:27

Hi.

I think, somewhere, but I cant find it, that your fella had a CT scan which showed nodules on his lungs. You were a bit concerned about these.

It rang bells with me. I dug out a copy of my CT scan it mentioned 'a 6mm nodule in the upper lobe of my right lung and numerous tiny nodules in both lung fields which were indeterminate' ???

It mentioned that my oesophagus appeared collapsed???

It mentioned that some of the bowel loops appeared collapsed. There also appear to be some changes of divertcular disease. Possibility of focal lesions/abnormalities cannot be exluded in the unprepared colon. Clinical correlation is advised???

It mentioned scattered lytic looking areas in pelvic bones and the femoral. These are indeterminate???

My CT scan read as bad as the last MOT on my clapped out car. 😁 

Soon after I had a bone scan which showed mid cervical spine activity consistent with degenerative change??? But fortunately concluded no scintigraphic features of skeletal metastatic disease.

Three years later, I've heard nothing about the lung nodules or the colon lesions. I'm hoping they are not cancerous.

I've still not been told what the holes or lytic areas in my bones were.

I've googled lung nodules they are common and usually benign. I've not researched the colon problem, but recently had a bowel cancer 'through the post' test, which came back negative.

I'm putting the bone problems, which sometimes ache like hell, as some sort of arthritis.

As for my collapsed oesophagus, I'm still eating and drinking okay.

I'm struggling enough with confirmed PCa, to push for follow ups on other likely disorders. 😁

The only reason I've posted this is to warn others that CT scans, aren't limited to prostate problems. They can reveal a myriad of other possible health issues.

Edited by member 25 Jul 2025 at 09:00  | Reason: Typo and additional text

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 21:59

Hi Adrian, hope your doing ok😊

Yeah his ct scan showed a tiny indeterminate nodule on his lung, they said nothing to worry about. 

How do you get copies of your results? Can you just ask for these? I am in Scotland and we dont have the app that is used in England. 

Reassuring to know that most lung nodules are benign, I am still a bit surprised that he has all these bone mets yet no spread to lymphs or organs, guess its one less thing to worry about🙌🏻

User
Posted 24 Jul 2025 at 22:04

You can request copies of scan results, biopsies etc. I think it's a good idea because you get so much information it can become confusing. Good luck, you're certainly due some.🤞

 

 
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