Getting my head around the fact I have cancer!

This is quite common, as most men don't have any symptoms, and indeed usually feel very well. So being told you have a serious condition which needs treatment and the treatment is going to make you feel worse can be understandably difficult to accept.

Sorry you're here, but hopefully we can answer questions for you. For many people, having answers and understanding what and why treatments are done can help and reduce the anxiety-generating unknown.

Hi Adrian, thank you for your supporting reply. Basically, I feel absolutely normal, apart from my hair deciding it would rather be somewhere else apart from my head! And at the moment, that is my biggest issue. I know I shouldn't care what other people think, but no hair makes me feel embarrassed. I have plenty of support from family and friends, work colleagues and management. My cancer nurse at the GP is amazing, but the McMillan counseling has been moved from 2-4 weeks to 6-8 weeks. I understand they are busy, but that is a hurdle I didn't expect. I'm trying my best to stay positive, so fingers crossed 🤞🏻. 

Hello Grant 👋🏻 

Sorry to find you here, this space will be valuable for support and advice so make sure you use and abuse it! 

My partner has recently been diagnosed with advanced metastatic PC, we both work in mental health and recognise the power of acceptance when it comes to big life events which this certainly is......however.....how you are feeling is completely normal, dont push it or worry about this part of how you are feeling, hopefully counselling will help🤞🏻....once you begin to accept this, you will start processing it better and then be able to move forward with this diagnosis being part of you.....its isn't going away, your new normal will take time to process, not just for you but everyone close to you. Its strange cos just before my partner was diagnosed we had conversations about how one of us would likely get cancer and how devastating that would be, even if curable and here we are 8 weeks later facing incurable PC, with no symptoms of any early disease......we are going with it cos we have no option, we dont want it, we don't agree with this s*** deal we have but its here and part of us now. 

Good luck Grant, keep talking♥️

Edited by member 24 Aug 2025 at 11:09  | Reason: Not specified

Literally yesterday, I was talking to someone and when I told them I had PC last year, they reacted by saying, 'isn't that the cancer where you are likely to die of old age before you die of the cancer'. This is such a kick in the teeth when you have been through so much and the cancer has changed my life so much. It is also such an insult to all those men who have died young when struck with PC. As always, I tried to correct this wrong thinking but it's like shouting at windmills.

You are normal for struggling with knowing that you have PC. I recently took part in a survey about the after effects of PC and was told that mental health was a constant thing that men were reporting. I hope you get the help necessary to come to terms with this terrible disease.