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It's life Jim, but not as we know it...

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User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 00:04

I admit this post is just letting off steam, there's nothing else that can come of it.  20 sessions EBRT July/August 2020. Three years of HT January 2020 to January 2023. Once I came off it took two years for my testosterone to come back. Now I'm back in the normal reference range and my libido has come back with a bang. If anything it seems stronger than it was before I went on the treatment. Sadly it's combined with complete erectile dysfunction. Been prescribed sildenafil which I've tried several times now and has made no difference. Can't use a vacuum pump as the EBRT left me with a stricture in my urethra and the pump may make it worse. Dying for sex but lack the means to do anything about it. With effort I can achieve a limp dry orgasm. Was never told before treatment that I might never be able to get an erection again, that I wouldn't be able to produce semen again, that my bowels and bladder could be fucked for the rest of my life. Bottom line is the treatment saved my life, for which I am of course grateful. I'm not stupid. Sadly the quality of life it's left me with is hard to come to terms with. Anyway, whine over. Thanks for reading if you've made it this far. Just feeling like s***.

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 18:54

Thanks Bean for your post. I’m hoping you’ve just been a bit unlucky. I’ve just completed 20 sessions of RT and a 6 month course of HT - relugolix tablets. I have a PSA blood test booked for early March. Presumably this will be a kind of baseline.

I’m feeling the effects of the RT . When I pee it’s just a dribble, and some discomfort. Also bowel movements 3 or 4 times a day instead of my previous regular morning one. They tell me though that this should improve after a few weeks as my body recovers from the radiation.

As for libido, and ED, I suppose I won’t know for a while. Certainly no feelings in that direction yet!

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 17:55

Some problems do have a brightside , dry orgasm means no clean up and partner more than happy tp perform oral sex to conclusion with no gagging , we need to take any positives we can .

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 12:54

Hi Bean121

I completely understand your frustration, in more ways than one, because following my prostatectomy which saved my life, left me with ED and arousal climacturia - a lethal combination - which initially made our sex life impossible. However we did manage to find a way back using Vacuum Erection Devices. I don't know how serious your problem with the stricture in your urethra is to stop you using a VED. If it is not painful may be worth gently trying a VED; your consultant/uroligist can help to assess whether it is safe to use such a device. Dry orgasms are something one gets used to. Best not to give up -  easier said than done.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 15:40

Hi have you been to an ED clinic? 

I'm afraid you will need to ever emphasise the importance of this and how depressed it makes you feel. (As if you needed to state the obvious) 

I can't help but feel you have your mindset in your favour, and I do hope you have a 100% supportive partner who can go with you to see your GP, consultant, or whoever, and explain its making her life extremely miserable too. 

The problem with your uretha needs a urologist to help with. Surely they can't just say that's it your fixed, sorry about all the damage on the way. 

I wish you hope and a steady solution to this 

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 16:16

Bean, my stricture was where the bladder and urethra were rejoined. I did refrain from using the pump for a while but my surgeon said it would be unlikely to be affected by the pump. Where is the location of your stricture. 

I was supposedly non nerve sparing and despite getting some swelling in the penis I never recovered and relied on artificial help for full swelling. We mastered the flaccid insertion technique, with out "of this world"  experiences. Never give up and have fun finding a solution. 

I am now on HT and fully get the quality of life point of view.

Thanks Chris 

Edited by member 15 Feb 2026 at 20:52  | Reason: Spelling

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 12:51

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Bean, my stricture was where the bladder and urethra were rejoined. I did refrain from using the pump for a while but my surgeon said it would be unlikely to be affected by the pump. Where is the location of your stricture. 

I was supposedly non nerve sparing and despite getting some swelling in the penis I never recovered and relied on artificial help for full swelling. We mastered the flaccid insertion technique, with out "of this world"  experiences. Never give up and have fun finding a solution. 

I am now on HT and fully get the quality of life point of view.

Thanks Chris 

Hi Chris, thanks for the reply. My stricture is below the prostate, so not that far up my urethra. That's why I'm nervous of making it worse with a pump. The main symptom I had from it was feeling to need to pee all the time even when I'd only just been. I've had it mostly under control for the past year thanks to Tamsulosin. Really don't want to risk making it bad again. Good to hear you've found a way around your own problem. Sadly my situation is complicated by not having a partner. I'm sure you'll understand that, much as I would like to, striking up a new relationship would be rather difficult given my ED. Not exactly the kind of topic you can broach when starting to date someone new!

all the best Stephen

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 13:01

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Thanks Bean for your post. I’m hoping you’ve just been a bit unlucky. I’ve just completed 20 sessions of RT and a 6 month course of HT - relugolix tablets. I have a PSA blood test booked for early March. Presumably this will be a kind of baseline.

I’m feeling the effects of the RT . When I pee it’s just a dribble, and some discomfort. Also bowel movements 3 or 4 times a day instead of my previous regular morning one. They tell me though that this should improve after a few weeks as my body recovers from the radiation.

As for libido, and ED, I suppose I won’t know for a while. Certainly no feelings in that direction yet!

Thanks mate. As you've only had six months of HT you may be ok as far a libido and ED go. Hope for the best for you in that respect. As for your bladder and bowel good luck and hope everything clears up soon. Neither of mine are right nearly six years after completing RT. I'm on Tamsulosin for my bladder which does help. A colonoscopy about a year ago found cellular damage and inactive radiation proctitis in my rectum so for me it's unlikely my bowels will ever completely return to normal but things have calmed down quite a lot so it's manageable now. Had some very unpleasant accidents the first couple of years but thankfully that's behind me now so to speak! All the best

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 14:04
Regarding a new relationship, yes it can be difficult, some run a mile as soon as you mention it BUT the right one won't and I can personally recommend perseverance....

I found the injections were the best solution when dating, check with your urologist / GP if they would be ok for you... The pump was never a good look on a new date 😂😂

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 19:20

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Regarding a new relationship, yes it can be difficult, some run a mile as soon as you mention it BUT the right one won't and I can personally recommend perseverance....

I found the injections were the best solution when dating, check with your urologist / GP if they would be ok for you... The pump was never a good look on a new date 😂😂

Thanks mate. True what you say but it's just at 70 my options are limited and long term prospects not great. In short I don't have much time to search for that right one. Can I ask what injections you found successful please?

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 22:19
Caverject worked for me... A pal of mine found love at 70 so don't give up just yet...
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User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 12:54

Hi Bean121

I completely understand your frustration, in more ways than one, because following my prostatectomy which saved my life, left me with ED and arousal climacturia - a lethal combination - which initially made our sex life impossible. However we did manage to find a way back using Vacuum Erection Devices. I don't know how serious your problem with the stricture in your urethra is to stop you using a VED. If it is not painful may be worth gently trying a VED; your consultant/uroligist can help to assess whether it is safe to use such a device. Dry orgasms are something one gets used to. Best not to give up -  easier said than done.

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate

 

 

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 15:40

Hi have you been to an ED clinic? 

I'm afraid you will need to ever emphasise the importance of this and how depressed it makes you feel. (As if you needed to state the obvious) 

I can't help but feel you have your mindset in your favour, and I do hope you have a 100% supportive partner who can go with you to see your GP, consultant, or whoever, and explain its making her life extremely miserable too. 

The problem with your uretha needs a urologist to help with. Surely they can't just say that's it your fixed, sorry about all the damage on the way. 

I wish you hope and a steady solution to this 

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 16:16

Bean, my stricture was where the bladder and urethra were rejoined. I did refrain from using the pump for a while but my surgeon said it would be unlikely to be affected by the pump. Where is the location of your stricture. 

I was supposedly non nerve sparing and despite getting some swelling in the penis I never recovered and relied on artificial help for full swelling. We mastered the flaccid insertion technique, with out "of this world"  experiences. Never give up and have fun finding a solution. 

I am now on HT and fully get the quality of life point of view.

Thanks Chris 

Edited by member 15 Feb 2026 at 20:52  | Reason: Spelling

User
Posted 15 Feb 2026 at 18:54

Thanks Bean for your post. I’m hoping you’ve just been a bit unlucky. I’ve just completed 20 sessions of RT and a 6 month course of HT - relugolix tablets. I have a PSA blood test booked for early March. Presumably this will be a kind of baseline.

I’m feeling the effects of the RT . When I pee it’s just a dribble, and some discomfort. Also bowel movements 3 or 4 times a day instead of my previous regular morning one. They tell me though that this should improve after a few weeks as my body recovers from the radiation.

As for libido, and ED, I suppose I won’t know for a while. Certainly no feelings in that direction yet!

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 12:37

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Hi Bean121

I completely understand your frustration, in more ways than one, because following my prostatectomy which saved my life, left me with ED and arousal climacturia - a lethal combination - which initially made our sex life impossible. However we did manage to find a way back using Vacuum Erection Devices. I don't know how serious your problem with the stricture in your urethra is to stop you using a VED. If it is not painful may be worth gently trying a VED; your consultant/uroligist can help to assess whether it is safe to use such a device. Dry orgasms are something one gets used to. Best not to give up -  easier said than done.

Thanks mate. It's not so much pain with my stricture it was feeling that I needed to go all the time, even when I'd only recently been.  I've been on Tamsulosin for a year now and that helps most of the time though still get the occasional spell. My stricture isn't that far up my urethra hence the fear of making it worse with a pump.

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 12:44

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Hi have you been to an ED clinic? 

I'm afraid you will need to ever emphasise the importance of this and how depressed it makes you feel. (As if you needed to state the obvious) 

I can't help but feel you have your mindset in your favour, and I do hope you have a 100% supportive partner who can go with you to see your GP, consultant, or whoever, and explain its making her life extremely miserable too. 

The problem with your uretha needs a urologist to help with. Surely they can't just say that's it your fixed, sorry about all the damage on the way. 

I wish you hope and a steady solution to this 

Thanks for the reply. No never been to a clinic. It's never been offered although they've known of my problem for a long time. Just prescribed sildenafil and now that hasn't worked my oncologist suggests I talk to my GP about having tadalafil. Told her I don't see much point as it only works by dilating blood vessels the same as sildenafil. Given that I'm on two blood pressure meds plus Tamsulosin, all of which dilate blood vessels, and the sildenafil still didn't work I don't think dilation is the problem.  I don't think my blood vessels could get any more dilated! Sadly I no longer have a partner and given my current state I can't see me finding one either.

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 12:51

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Bean, my stricture was where the bladder and urethra were rejoined. I did refrain from using the pump for a while but my surgeon said it would be unlikely to be affected by the pump. Where is the location of your stricture. 

I was supposedly non nerve sparing and despite getting some swelling in the penis I never recovered and relied on artificial help for full swelling. We mastered the flaccid insertion technique, with out "of this world"  experiences. Never give up and have fun finding a solution. 

I am now on HT and fully get the quality of life point of view.

Thanks Chris 

Hi Chris, thanks for the reply. My stricture is below the prostate, so not that far up my urethra. That's why I'm nervous of making it worse with a pump. The main symptom I had from it was feeling to need to pee all the time even when I'd only just been. I've had it mostly under control for the past year thanks to Tamsulosin. Really don't want to risk making it bad again. Good to hear you've found a way around your own problem. Sadly my situation is complicated by not having a partner. I'm sure you'll understand that, much as I would like to, striking up a new relationship would be rather difficult given my ED. Not exactly the kind of topic you can broach when starting to date someone new!

all the best Stephen

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 13:01

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Thanks Bean for your post. I’m hoping you’ve just been a bit unlucky. I’ve just completed 20 sessions of RT and a 6 month course of HT - relugolix tablets. I have a PSA blood test booked for early March. Presumably this will be a kind of baseline.

I’m feeling the effects of the RT . When I pee it’s just a dribble, and some discomfort. Also bowel movements 3 or 4 times a day instead of my previous regular morning one. They tell me though that this should improve after a few weeks as my body recovers from the radiation.

As for libido, and ED, I suppose I won’t know for a while. Certainly no feelings in that direction yet!

Thanks mate. As you've only had six months of HT you may be ok as far a libido and ED go. Hope for the best for you in that respect. As for your bladder and bowel good luck and hope everything clears up soon. Neither of mine are right nearly six years after completing RT. I'm on Tamsulosin for my bladder which does help. A colonoscopy about a year ago found cellular damage and inactive radiation proctitis in my rectum so for me it's unlikely my bowels will ever completely return to normal but things have calmed down quite a lot so it's manageable now. Had some very unpleasant accidents the first couple of years but thankfully that's behind me now so to speak! All the best

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 14:04
Regarding a new relationship, yes it can be difficult, some run a mile as soon as you mention it BUT the right one won't and I can personally recommend perseverance....

I found the injections were the best solution when dating, check with your urologist / GP if they would be ok for you... The pump was never a good look on a new date 😂😂

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 17:55

Some problems do have a brightside , dry orgasm means no clean up and partner more than happy tp perform oral sex to conclusion with no gagging , we need to take any positives we can .

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 19:20

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Regarding a new relationship, yes it can be difficult, some run a mile as soon as you mention it BUT the right one won't and I can personally recommend perseverance....

I found the injections were the best solution when dating, check with your urologist / GP if they would be ok for you... The pump was never a good look on a new date 😂😂

Thanks mate. True what you say but it's just at 70 my options are limited and long term prospects not great. In short I don't have much time to search for that right one. Can I ask what injections you found successful please?

User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 22:19
Caverject worked for me... A pal of mine found love at 70 so don't give up just yet...
User
Posted 16 Feb 2026 at 22:50

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Caverject worked for me... A pal of mine found love at 70 so don't give up just yet...

Thanks. I've just put in an online order for Caverject. Will see how it goes.

User
Posted 19 Feb 2026 at 12:04

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member

Originally Posted by: Online Community Member
Caverject worked for me... A pal of mine found love at 70 so don't give up just yet...

Thanks. I've just put in an online order for Caverject. Will see how it goes.

Oh well, so much for that. My order with the online pharmacy has been rejected by their doctor. I have to be prescribed it by an ED clinic and shown how to use it by a healthcare professional. This despite the wealth of guidance on how to use it available on the web, including stuff published by NHS Trusts. I fail to see what I could be told in person that would be any different. So now I have to try and get a referral to a clinic, which may take months.

User
Posted 20 Feb 2026 at 07:46
If you have £250 quid spare just book a session with a private urologist, they can prescribe it.
 
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