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The stress of normal life while dealing with cancer

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User
Posted 25 Feb 2026 at 09:38

Having just embarked on the journey that is prostate cancer I find dealing with every day issues increasingly difficult, I have to admit I’m one of life’s great procrastinators but find dealing with normal issues eg, car insurance, the fences need repairing what to buy from the supermarket for next week’s meals etc etc increasingly difficult to deal with.

I have always been a bit of a person who only plans for the next 24hrs or so but now find it stressful thinking ahead a couple of hours things just seem to pile up to the point where it feels like my heads going to explode.

do any of you out there find dealing with cancer and the day to day issues of life particularly stressful 

just to add it’s the daily aspect of life and all it’s issues I find hard to deal with as I’m extremely pragmatic about the actual cancer diagnosis 

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 08:16

Everyone  deals with things in different ways, it's a highly personal thing and I guess it's built on the foundations of how you were brought up and your personality. 

Some worry themselves so much over every little thing, some take it in their stride. Some stumble on in a daze and some are proactive and engaged. 

You can be advised to do this or that, exercise more, eat healthily etc etc. But at the end of the day it comes down to what you can do. Some choose to do very little, finding a terminal diagnosis overwhelming. Some choose to fight tooth and nail for every extra moment of life they can wring out of themselves.

Dealing with life's everyday issues can seem pointless or overwhelming when you have made peace with your diagnosis. Its just about living the best life you can for as long as you can, in my opinion. For some that is letting the house fall down round their ears, for some it is trekking in Nepal. 

Do your best within your own physical and mental capabilities,  but get help if you are struggling. Talk to someone who knows how to help and make things easier for you to cope with.

Mick 

User
Posted 27 Feb 2026 at 08:23
Thanks for your reply Antoinette, I actually feel ok physically Iā€™m still in the gym 5 days a week, as Adrian has mentioned above sleep is probably my biggest issue, waking 3 times a night to use the toilet then struggling to get back to sleep, the effects of this are obviously why things seem to get on top of me but thanks to people like you Adrian and everyone else on here life goes on with optimism

Regards everyone

Richard

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 00:13

Belgium, quite a few have looked at yours post but no one has made a comment, perhaps no one has issues or more likely they don't know how to reply to the post. 

Another option is they are putting it off until tomorrow. I was working when diagnosed and had a job where procrastination wasn't an option.  With non work related things I would put things on the back burner. 

I am quite a laid back sort of person and have an attitude of don't worry about things you cannot change. The diagnosis period is probably the worst part of the journey, once you have a plan in place and after treatment you can get back to your new normal. 

Thanks Chris 

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 07:51

Everyone is different and deals with things in a variety of ways. I don’t know how to respond to you other than my experience. I work in property and when diagnosed I thought of my body as a property (temple of doom perhaps!!??) and what would I do if it was work related. I went through the options as if it was dealing with a property issue and then made my decision (surgery) accepting that the issue should/may get resolved but with a sub optimal post works result. Once that decision was made I focussed solely on sorting the problem out and then recovering. That was the priority over all else. I was fortunate in having a supportive wife family and work. Once I’d got over that I carried on with life. Hope that helps and good luck.

User
Posted 25 Feb 2026 at 09:38

Having just embarked on the journey that is prostate cancer I find dealing with every day issues increasingly difficult, I have to admit I’m one of life’s great procrastinators but find dealing with normal issues eg, car insurance, the fences need repairing what to buy from the supermarket for next week’s meals etc etc increasingly difficult to deal with.

I have always been a bit of a person who only plans for the next 24hrs or so but now find it stressful thinking ahead a couple of hours things just seem to pile up to the point where it feels like my heads going to explode.

do any of you out there find dealing with cancer and the day to day issues of life particularly stressful 

just to add it’s the daily aspect of life and all it’s issues I find hard to deal with as I’m extremely pragmatic about the actual cancer diagnosis 

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 08:13

Hi, Richard.

I have felt exactly the same as you, mate.

Dealing with everyday chores became hard work. Although you appear to have been pragmatic about your diagnosis, in an early post you mention that your sleep has been affected. Fatigue is very debilitating both physically and mentally. 

I felt very tired and lacked energy. I found it difficult to motivate myself to do anything. I suspect a lot of men feel the same but are too macho to admit it.

In my case, I gradually began to sleep better and things began to improve.

Good luck, mate. šŸ‘

User
Posted 27 Feb 2026 at 22:07

Dear Richard, it's great you are going to the gym. That is probably the best possible thing you can do. Couple things that helped my husband with sleeping: he goes to bed much, much earlier. And he stops drinking liquid early too= around 7 PM. He drinks water (next to the bed) if he is extremely thirsty, but this way he seems to get more sleep after his first waking to go in the night. I know someone who doesn't have anything to drink at night after 6:30 PM. 

A lot of men on here walk long distances. My husband too. He walks for hours every day. Getting some exercise in both morning and evening seems to help him sleep.

All this said, things were really difficult at first. For months. Eventually things normalized, fortunately. He also makes checklists for everything that needs to be done. That has been hugely successful, and like Antoinette the reward (a coffee, a break, whatever) is also nice after completing something. This also helped put him back into control of many things. Hang in there!

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User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 00:13

Belgium, quite a few have looked at yours post but no one has made a comment, perhaps no one has issues or more likely they don't know how to reply to the post. 

Another option is they are putting it off until tomorrow. I was working when diagnosed and had a job where procrastination wasn't an option.  With non work related things I would put things on the back burner. 

I am quite a laid back sort of person and have an attitude of don't worry about things you cannot change. The diagnosis period is probably the worst part of the journey, once you have a plan in place and after treatment you can get back to your new normal. 

Thanks Chris 

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 07:51

Everyone is different and deals with things in a variety of ways. I don’t know how to respond to you other than my experience. I work in property and when diagnosed I thought of my body as a property (temple of doom perhaps!!??) and what would I do if it was work related. I went through the options as if it was dealing with a property issue and then made my decision (surgery) accepting that the issue should/may get resolved but with a sub optimal post works result. Once that decision was made I focussed solely on sorting the problem out and then recovering. That was the priority over all else. I was fortunate in having a supportive wife family and work. Once I’d got over that I carried on with life. Hope that helps and good luck.

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 08:13

Hi, Richard.

I have felt exactly the same as you, mate.

Dealing with everyday chores became hard work. Although you appear to have been pragmatic about your diagnosis, in an early post you mention that your sleep has been affected. Fatigue is very debilitating both physically and mentally. 

I felt very tired and lacked energy. I found it difficult to motivate myself to do anything. I suspect a lot of men feel the same but are too macho to admit it.

In my case, I gradually began to sleep better and things began to improve.

Good luck, mate. šŸ‘

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 08:16

Everyone  deals with things in different ways, it's a highly personal thing and I guess it's built on the foundations of how you were brought up and your personality. 

Some worry themselves so much over every little thing, some take it in their stride. Some stumble on in a daze and some are proactive and engaged. 

You can be advised to do this or that, exercise more, eat healthily etc etc. But at the end of the day it comes down to what you can do. Some choose to do very little, finding a terminal diagnosis overwhelming. Some choose to fight tooth and nail for every extra moment of life they can wring out of themselves.

Dealing with life's everyday issues can seem pointless or overwhelming when you have made peace with your diagnosis. Its just about living the best life you can for as long as you can, in my opinion. For some that is letting the house fall down round their ears, for some it is trekking in Nepal. 

Do your best within your own physical and mental capabilities,  but get help if you are struggling. Talk to someone who knows how to help and make things easier for you to cope with.

Mick 

User
Posted 26 Feb 2026 at 23:01

Hi I can't speak as the person suffering with cancer, only as the wife of one. Suffering may be too extreme a word.

How do you physically feel? I know husband feels OK. He gets a bit sweaty for a minute or two, and that's it. 

You seem to be describing a lack of concentration to carry out everyday tasks, which sounds like a stress reaction.  Perhaps chat this through with your GP.

If I feel a bit overwhelmed, I'll tell myself, just tackle one task, and then have a reward: a coffee, a walk, or anything you like. 

I had a very odd thought the other day.

Life is like a beautiful plait of hair, long and lustrous. The cancer is just a thin thread woven into it. You know its there, but it might not be too noticeable. The plait is still beautiful. It's just coming through every so often, like appointments, tests, or PSAs. 

User
Posted 27 Feb 2026 at 08:23
Thanks for your reply Antoinette, I actually feel ok physically Iā€™m still in the gym 5 days a week, as Adrian has mentioned above sleep is probably my biggest issue, waking 3 times a night to use the toilet then struggling to get back to sleep, the effects of this are obviously why things seem to get on top of me but thanks to people like you Adrian and everyone else on here life goes on with optimism

Regards everyone

Richard

User
Posted 27 Feb 2026 at 22:07

Dear Richard, it's great you are going to the gym. That is probably the best possible thing you can do. Couple things that helped my husband with sleeping: he goes to bed much, much earlier. And he stops drinking liquid early too= around 7 PM. He drinks water (next to the bed) if he is extremely thirsty, but this way he seems to get more sleep after his first waking to go in the night. I know someone who doesn't have anything to drink at night after 6:30 PM. 

A lot of men on here walk long distances. My husband too. He walks for hours every day. Getting some exercise in both morning and evening seems to help him sleep.

All this said, things were really difficult at first. For months. Eventually things normalized, fortunately. He also makes checklists for everything that needs to be done. That has been hugely successful, and like Antoinette the reward (a coffee, a break, whatever) is also nice after completing something. This also helped put him back into control of many things. Hang in there!

 
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