Notification

Error

3 weeks into surgery recovery

Email this conversation Print this conversation
User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 11:43

Hi, brand new to the forum but I’m 3 weeks into into recovery from surgery after a Gleason 7 diagnosis. I’m 46 and had nerve sparing surgery so was hoping for minimal impact on leakage and ED problems but it’s been as bad as I could have imagined. Zero control of my bladder and not even twinge in the wee man. Just looking for any advice, reassurance, tips etc. Thanks 

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 14:28

Rob, welcome to the club. Nerve sparing doesn't have a direct impact on incontinence.  Even with nerve sparing surgery it can take months or even years to fully recover. You can have a lot of fun finding solutions to the issue.


You have been bashed about down things need time to settle down and heal. Take it one day at a time. Pelvic exercises are designed to help with incontinence but may help a little with ED. 


Best wishes with your recovery.


Thanks Chris 

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 14:59
3 weeks after my surgery I was still in hospital but that's another story! Way to early to be worrying about either. Took me 6 months to get continent and 2 years to get it up!

Don't be surprised when you ejaculate urine (6 years to sort that!), wet yourself on arousal and when drinking alcohol (3 years) and all when you think you have cracked the other issues!

Why they don't tell you any of this stuff I don't know! Maybe I wasn't listening.

Good news is everything great now after 11 years.

Don't forget to ask about a vacuum pump and Cialis for rehab.
User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 20:01

Hi Robthre


I had prostatectomy over 15 years ago and one thing I learnt was that there is no way of judging how the recovery occurs after this surgery, particularly the extent of damage to the nerves and the problem with incontinence. Generally younger you are better the prognosis, so that is in your favour.


At three weeks you should see some sign of regaining continence. Are you doing pelvic floor exercises because that is very important. Make sure you acquire a vacuum pump (initially a cheap one from a sex shop would do). This helps to remind your penis/nerves what their functions are. You are young and I would expect you to regain full bladder control. Also it is important to masturbate - not the normal way - by stroking your  frenulum and the glan; you don't need an erection for this or a vigorous action. However you may leak or ejaculate urine and be prepared for that. The brain-penis connection plays a vital part and, of course, if you and your wife/partner pleasure each other to orgasm it is great fun and even laughter.


 

Edited by member 10 May 2026 at 20:03  | Reason: Not specified

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate


 


 

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 20:52
Hi Roobster, I hope it helps to provide the perspective of the experience of my husband. He was not continent (at all) at 3 weeks post RP. The beginning for him sounds a lot more like francij1. But he was essentially continent at 3 months. At least sufficiently for us to travel and socialize without concern. At least until salvage RT, but even after that he recovered. He is still soon after HT so cannot comment on the rest.
User
Posted 11 May 2026 at 11:29

Hi, Roobster.


Welcome to the forum.


You're much younger than most of us old codgers and it must be more difficult dealing with side effects.


However, being younger you have a better chance of making a very good recovery. If you had full nerve sparing surgery, and everything was in good working order prior to your op, you are far more likely to regain natural erections.


It's very early days for you. Generally it takes up to 6 months to regain bladder control. However, like everything with this disease and the treatment of it, results can vary enormously.


I remember how disappointed I was a month pre-op, but gradually things got better.


I was 'dry' about 5 months post op. I had non nerve sparing RARP. Unfortunately, at present, I still can't get natural erections, but penile injections, do the trick.


I'm pretty sure things will soon start improving for you, and like me, those post op horror days, will  just become a faded memory.


Good luck, mate.👍 

Show Most Thanked Posts
User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 14:28

Rob, welcome to the club. Nerve sparing doesn't have a direct impact on incontinence.  Even with nerve sparing surgery it can take months or even years to fully recover. You can have a lot of fun finding solutions to the issue.


You have been bashed about down things need time to settle down and heal. Take it one day at a time. Pelvic exercises are designed to help with incontinence but may help a little with ED. 


Best wishes with your recovery.


Thanks Chris 

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 14:59
3 weeks after my surgery I was still in hospital but that's another story! Way to early to be worrying about either. Took me 6 months to get continent and 2 years to get it up!

Don't be surprised when you ejaculate urine (6 years to sort that!), wet yourself on arousal and when drinking alcohol (3 years) and all when you think you have cracked the other issues!

Why they don't tell you any of this stuff I don't know! Maybe I wasn't listening.

Good news is everything great now after 11 years.

Don't forget to ask about a vacuum pump and Cialis for rehab.
User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 18:48

Oh wow….. was not expecting that 😕 fair play as sounds like your in good spirits with it all and most importantly still here 11 years later to tell the tale ❤️

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 20:01

Hi Robthre


I had prostatectomy over 15 years ago and one thing I learnt was that there is no way of judging how the recovery occurs after this surgery, particularly the extent of damage to the nerves and the problem with incontinence. Generally younger you are better the prognosis, so that is in your favour.


At three weeks you should see some sign of regaining continence. Are you doing pelvic floor exercises because that is very important. Make sure you acquire a vacuum pump (initially a cheap one from a sex shop would do). This helps to remind your penis/nerves what their functions are. You are young and I would expect you to regain full bladder control. Also it is important to masturbate - not the normal way - by stroking your  frenulum and the glan; you don't need an erection for this or a vigorous action. However you may leak or ejaculate urine and be prepared for that. The brain-penis connection plays a vital part and, of course, if you and your wife/partner pleasure each other to orgasm it is great fun and even laughter.


 

Edited by member 10 May 2026 at 20:03  | Reason: Not specified

 'Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.'                    Richard Feynman (1918-1988) Nobel Prize laureate


 


 

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 20:19

Brilliant, thank you for some words of wisdom 🙌🏼


pelvic floor routine is being followed religiously and have a pump on order along with some blue pills. I guess like many others despite extensive research before hand I hoped for the best so the reality of the worst even in these early days is a big shock. I’m typically a super positive person so trying to control the controllables and not let my mind spiral 💪🏼

User
Posted 10 May 2026 at 20:52
Hi Roobster, I hope it helps to provide the perspective of the experience of my husband. He was not continent (at all) at 3 weeks post RP. The beginning for him sounds a lot more like francij1. But he was essentially continent at 3 months. At least sufficiently for us to travel and socialize without concern. At least until salvage RT, but even after that he recovered. He is still soon after HT so cannot comment on the rest.
User
Posted 11 May 2026 at 11:29

Hi, Roobster.


Welcome to the forum.


You're much younger than most of us old codgers and it must be more difficult dealing with side effects.


However, being younger you have a better chance of making a very good recovery. If you had full nerve sparing surgery, and everything was in good working order prior to your op, you are far more likely to regain natural erections.


It's very early days for you. Generally it takes up to 6 months to regain bladder control. However, like everything with this disease and the treatment of it, results can vary enormously.


I remember how disappointed I was a month pre-op, but gradually things got better.


I was 'dry' about 5 months post op. I had non nerve sparing RARP. Unfortunately, at present, I still can't get natural erections, but penile injections, do the trick.


I'm pretty sure things will soon start improving for you, and like me, those post op horror days, will  just become a faded memory.


Good luck, mate.👍 

 
Forum Jump  
Email this conversation Print this conversation

Join the online community now.

Click through to become a member and gain access to support, information and real time replies.




MenuTop ▲
©2026 Prostate Cancer UK