Notification

Error

Incontinence getting me down

Email this conversation Print this conversation
User
Posted 18 May 2026 at 16:15

Hi all. I am new here. Had my ralp surgery on 8th May and twoc on 14th May. 

I was initially quite positive first couple of days after twoc as was going to the loo and emptying my bladder with a quite a few small leaks standing or bending down. Last few days things have got worse though. I'm now having leaks all the time even with slight movement and using about 6 pads a day. Going to the loo ok still but not really passing a lot each time probably because of the leaks I guess. 

After feeling quite positive am now quickly becoming quite down about it.

I guess the one positive is I'm sleeping well and pretty much dry through the night. Just a few dribbles I think after going for a pee in the night.

Everyone around me is saying things will get better but right now I just can't see it.

Still doing Kegals every day and hoping that will help in the end.

Onwards and upwards I guess.

Edited by member 18 May 2026 at 17:00  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 18 May 2026 at 20:10

Hi I was similar to you. I had my op just over 3 years ago. For the 1st 4 weeks or so I could not as they say hold water and was going through 9/10 pads a day and sometimes wetting through. I must have been a nightmare as a toddler to potty train!! Anyway something clicked eventually and I was able to get control so much so that after 8 months ish I was and remain on 1 pad a day. It’s there for security as some days I’m dry others for no apparent reason quite damp. One thing to remember is everyone is different. Also fake it easy as I found in the 1st few weeks if I did too much such as extra walks I was wetter. Good luck with the recovery. 

User
Posted 18 May 2026 at 21:33
Planetzarg, it is only 10 days since your surgery! You can reasonably assume it will take you several months for things to settle down.

People tend to underappreciate that prostatectomy is major surgery - because it is done robotically there are only small scars but there has been an awful lot of messing around with you on the inside. We all have a tendency to want to recover faster than we do, but actually it happens at its own pace. You are completely normal for this stage, with a good chance of recovering full continence.

Show Most Thanked Posts
User
Posted 18 May 2026 at 20:10

Hi I was similar to you. I had my op just over 3 years ago. For the 1st 4 weeks or so I could not as they say hold water and was going through 9/10 pads a day and sometimes wetting through. I must have been a nightmare as a toddler to potty train!! Anyway something clicked eventually and I was able to get control so much so that after 8 months ish I was and remain on 1 pad a day. It’s there for security as some days I’m dry others for no apparent reason quite damp. One thing to remember is everyone is different. Also fake it easy as I found in the 1st few weeks if I did too much such as extra walks I was wetter. Good luck with the recovery. 

User
Posted 18 May 2026 at 21:33
Planetzarg, it is only 10 days since your surgery! You can reasonably assume it will take you several months for things to settle down.

People tend to underappreciate that prostatectomy is major surgery - because it is done robotically there are only small scars but there has been an awful lot of messing around with you on the inside. We all have a tendency to want to recover faster than we do, but actually it happens at its own pace. You are completely normal for this stage, with a good chance of recovering full continence.

User
Posted 18 May 2026 at 22:03

Thanks for your reply.

I really am trying to be positive I just didn't realise how bad the incontinence would be at least at the beginning. I have had many conversations with various urology nurses along the way who all probably wanted to re assure me perhaps more than they should regarding incontinence. 

I guess I'm just one of those people who would rather know the worse case scenario and hope for the best.

It's just taken me a bit by surprise I suppose. 

There are positives. Physically I'm good really with very little if no pain at all from day 1 and I am eating and sleeping well with no accidents, so far at least, during the night.

Also I am aware my complaints are probably very feeble compared to many guys dealing with a lot worse situations.

 

 
Forum Jump  
Email this conversation Print this conversation

Join the online community now.

Click through to become a member and gain access to support, information and real time replies.




MenuTop ▲
©2026 Prostate Cancer UK