Helping my Dad (85)

User

Posted 05 Jul 2014 at 19:21

I posted this in Si's thread, but decided it would be better started as a thread on its own. I read Si's and Topgun's threads with great interest, as they have tales of hope for us all.

I was able to diagnose my PCa as my father and grandfather both had prostate problems, so I was always on the look out for anything untoward.

My dad (85) was diagnosed with PCa 4 months ago, and has been told he needs an op on one of his kidneys, but he does not know what. He is still very fit for his age.

He will have to wear a catheter for life, and is on HT treatment with monthly injections and daily tablets.

I will be going with him to see his consultant on Thursday, to find out exactly what is going on, so could do with some advice as to the questions I should be asking.

Some are obvious: PSA level, the spread, what is the op and why does he need it. (I should add here that he loves going to Mykonos with my mum, and having returned from a 17 day stay in June, has also booked for another 10 in October. Uninsured, of course! His view is he would rather enjoy what he has now than suffer the consequences of an op he thinks he would rather not have if it cannot improve his quality of life.)

Other obvious questions are outlook - will he go down hill quickly, or can he expect a good quality of life for a few more years?
How long will the HT treatment be effective? What is the next option?

Si and Topgun - your stories are inspiring and offer hope to those who come on here looking for answers, as is Mo, and I hope to be able to help my dad as you helped Mick. My mum has age related memory loss, so will need lots of support. I want to try and help avoid all the difficulties and experiences that poor Zarissa has had to endure.

Once again, any suggestions to help me prepare for Thursday would be much appreciated.

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 05 Jul 2014 at 22:43

Hi just thought I would reply dont know if you have read Eric's profile. How long has your Dad been on HT and which other meds.I can understand why your Dad is unsure of op as it sounds if he is still active.Eric is 65 and does not have much of a quality of life now.Does your dad have any mets and is it the pc that has affect his kidney just need a bit more info.

Carol

User

Posted 06 Jul 2014 at 08:41

It's the lack of info that I have that is the problem. I am not sure he has listened properly to what he has been told, or does not want to tell. That is why I want to go with him to find out exactly where we are up to.

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 06 Jul 2014 at 10:38

Hi,

Yes until we and of course you and your Dad find out what they want to do it is hard to comment. The proposed operation on the kidneys could be something simple like a stent being inserted. At 85 you wouldn't think that they would undertake a serious operation no matter how fit he is. Quality of life every time at that age, and it seems to me that the locals at Mykonos should be warned that he is coming.....good for him! Let us know the outcome of your Thursday consultation, take notes and you could ask if you can record the conversation, most consultants will go along with that.

Best of luck

Life is for living ....and your Dad certainly seems up for that,

Barry (alias Barrington )

User

Posted 06 Jul 2014 at 23:20

Cheers TG - for you to put in a reply with all that's going on is unbelievable. Make sure you get yourself right for Dublin.

I will post asap, but I have a busy few weeks ahead, with golf and running around after my dad and the mother-in-law. I will be house cleaning every available minute - my job as the other half still works and spends a lot of time in the garden.

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 07 Jul 2014 at 10:59

Best wishes and good luck to your Dad Paul,

Steve

User

Posted 10 Jul 2014 at 22:28

The good news - things seem much better than we feared. My dad was told he would need a catheter for life, but apparently it cae out when on holiday in Mykonos, where it could not be reinserted, but the doctors told him he was emptying his bladder anyway.

The consultant today said that this was because his treatment had shrunk his prostate so he was happy for him to carry on without - not only that he probably won't need the op on his kidney as the flow to his bladder is much improved.

The injections he is on should only be 12 weekly, but he has had them monthly. No long term effects from this - just an unnecessary extra cost to the taxpayer.

He has to have another PSA test and will see the consultant in 2/3 weeks, and have a scan on his bladder to check it is being emptied.

So all in all - things are looking much better for the short/medium term, and at 85, that is as much as could be hoped for.

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 11 Jul 2014 at 08:51

Excellent news and as you say he is doing very well for an 85 year old . The 3 monthly injection he is now on is probably prostate , might have been Zolodex before but either way it seems to be doing its tricks. Actually I don't see any reason why he couldn't self catheterise whilst on holiday in Mykonos. Might be worth checking this out with his GP, might just be a case that they won't be able to prescribe the catheters out there, whereas he could take some with him.

Either way he is doing well hope things are finer with you too.

Life is for living

Barry ( alias Barrington )

User

Posted 11 Jul 2014 at 08:54

Thanks for the reply Barry - looks like the hallucinations have worn off! It was the shrinking prostate that caused the problems, if he can manage without, then that's great. We'll see what's said on his next visit.

Paul

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 11 Jul 2014 at 13:26

Good news ,Paul. My own lovely father in law died with PCa at age 96. He had it zapped once a year for last 10 years and had good quality of life.

Notification

Join the online community now.