One month on post surgery. How time flies. Well I am fully recovered, no pain, no incontinence and achieve perfect activity from my nether regions. And fairies and Father Christmas are real. The reality is I think I am getting on pretty well. I don't have any pain other than a slight discomfort from my right hand side where I believe the inflation thingy was used and that usually only happens as a reminder that I should still be taking things very easy still. The incontinence issue is decreasing on a daily basis and is nothing like I imagined it would be.
It is a sort of Taboo subject to discuss but for the benefit of those following on I will break that taboo and tell it like it is. After the removal of the catheter I was expecting to be "dribbling" but fortunately that wasn't the case and other than a brief stop in the previous farmers field on the way home all seemed ok. With frequent trips to the loo at the slightest urge, I was able to confine leakage to a tiny amount, a smug feeling that this was a piece of cake and I was going to breeze through it. Nighttime was definitely easier than the day I suspect due to inactivity which was a clue I failed to pick up on straight away. Due to my enforced driving ban for a fortnight, my medical staff undertook the driving and I gratefully occupied the passenger seat for a change. Whilst leaving to take the dogs out for a walk to the woods, I remarked that luckily there are usually no people about which would enable me to nip behind a tree to should the urge take with relative ease. Oh Woe was me! I should have recognised that tiny urge and dealt with it before leaving home. The last 100yds to the woods are along a rather bumpy, unmade road which was my downfall. My body was getting reasonably accustomed to my gentle shuffling about at home but gave up the ghost at being shaken like a ball bearing on a spin dryer and my first real "Oops" moment overtook me with unexpected results. There were two very important lessons to be learnt from this.Number one, never pass up the opportunity to use the available facilities before leaving home, passing one in the street,shop or wherever they happen to be even if you dont think you "need" to go. The second I will pass over very quickly due to my own ineptitude. I have an emergency kit to take with me containing all that is required to deal with an "oops". Its absolutely no good sitting at home in the kitchen when its really needed. Dont leave home without it!
There is also various techniques which have become second nature now after learning what provokes an Oops. One that took a while to get my head around was getting in and out of the car. The normal method of opening the door and depositing my rear onto the seat with legs akimbo doesnt work no matter how careful and slowly it is accomplished. I have now resorted to a very ladylike lowering my self onto the seat, legs firmly together and then pivoting onto the seat whilst still keeping the legs together. Whilst no doubt very elegant for the fairer sex, it is rather incongruous for a man but does seem to avoid that embarrassing feeling. I seem to be having less and less of these as time goes by which is a good sign of better times to come and there has not been any occasion where I have soaked the protective pad, something I was actually expecting.
Coughs and sneezes spread diseases is not quite what I experienced. Any violent shaking or movement do provoke the feeling of an impending Oops and an amount of pain to remind you that all is still not mended below but the use of the Pelvic Floor exercise as the event happens have brought a big level of control over this. A big thank you to whoever told me how to cough and sneeze. In normal circumstances a sneeze is an Atishoo! I was told to avoid this as it results in a vast degree of pain especially in the early stages of recovery, stuff convention and just go for the Atish. Cough and sneeze mouth fully open, preferably in the standing position with no attempt to contain the sudden expulsion of air. Works a treat with relatively no discomfort. Maybe not recommended for wandering around the shops but needs must.
A embarrassing confession on the use of and my expertise with PFE. I had done as suggested and practised these at home prior to the op and was fairly confident I had it all in hand and my recovery would be easier......until I had the catheter removed and the nurse asked me to demonstrate my prowess. Hmmm. All my puffing and grunting exercises whilst making a fabulous spectacle of my myself were to no avail. I had not been doing them correctly and once shown by an expert, not only were they far easier but amazingly worked a treat. If the opportunity arises to be "checked" by an expert take it. Better still ask to be shown or taken through them by those that really know how its done. Reading the words and doing it seem to be two different things.
A practical offer of help to any that may need them. I have about 50 night bags and some day bags, leg straps and various other paraphernalia for anybody just post op who may want them. They were donated to me and as I only had the catheter for about a week so are now available to pass on for the cost of the postage being donated to PCA. Any takers?
So the next step for me is at the beginning of October when I return to see the Surgeon and get my results. Currently I am delighted to be recovering well, taking it easy and enjoying the simple things in life. The satisfaction of being able to vigorously wash my hair in the shower, walk up and down stairs without holding on, bend over without it being an exercise in pain limitation all contribute to moving on. The medical staff has resigned from her post and has returned to being a normal woman to share the normal things in life without having to look after my welfare on an hourly basis. I cant express my gratitude to her enough for all she did for me in my hour of need. I am even starting to think about her as an object of desire again...... I must talk to the Doctor about ED soon!
Delighted to be getting better Dick