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Dad - not looking good

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User

Posted 04 Sep 2015 at 23:07

The end can't be far away now. We have not been able to converse with dad for 2 days. He is being given regular morphine and sedatives, but is still calling out due to spasms of pain. None of us can choose how we leave our mortal lives, but this is not pleasant to watch - to be the sufferer, it must be unbearable. I wouldn't be surprised if we get woken by a phone call tonight.

Whatever happens, for the family I have to be strong and....

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 04 Sep 2015 at 23:45

This will perhaps be a detail that some members would prefer not to know, in which case they should stop reading.

Paul, the human body is an amazing thing. It was explained to me (when I was in a situation similar to the one you currently find yourself in) that when someone is approaching the final stages, the brain stops sending signals to eat and drink. As a result, the person begins to dehydrate and this prompts the brain to produce a sort of natural painkiller. The body still behaves as if in pain, but the person doesn't know they are in pain because that part of the brain disconnects from the rest. So, as terrible as it is to witness, your dad's mind will not know that his body is feeling pain.

I hope that gives you some comfort - it certainly helped me when I needed it most x

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User

Posted 04 Sep 2015 at 23:47

My thoughts are with you, I have been in your position with my mum "morphined" for weeks before finally losing her battle - I would not wish it on anyone.

Remember the good times.

Maureen x

"You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think." A A Milne

User

Posted 05 Sep 2015 at 00:03

Sending lots of love

Louise x

User

Posted 05 Sep 2015 at 10:24

Paul

I hope Lyn's words will comfort you. I have heard the same explanation too. I was told that the mind is not in conflict with the body at all, in fact they are working with each other very carefully to ensure the least troubling departure.

It is hard for any of us to watch a loved one die, we stay with them, hold their hands, talk to them and offer any comfort that we can. That is all we know how to do.

My thoughts are with you and your family. Some may crticise me for saying this but I do hope this can soon be over for you all so that you can leave death behind you and start remembering life again.

Best wishes and a very big virtual hug from me

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 02:54

I don't know where to start but it's been a memorable 24 hours.

The elder daughter announced her engagement this weekend. Last week, I told dad a proposal was in the offing and he was able to say he was delighted which she was thrilled about.

I spent nearly all day with him but he chose to leave us at 2.00 am, 50 minutes ago. I raced to the hospital but it was too late. I'm sitting waiting for my Aunt to come. Mum didn't want to.

The emotions of life which is why I always try to....

Stay Calm And Carry On.

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 03:29

In our thoughts and in our prayers.....

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 03:32

Your Dad is at peace now Paul and you gave him all you could. RIP.

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 07:25

Deepest condolences to you and your family Paul.

Don't deny the diagnosis; try to defy the verdict

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 07:43

So sorry from us both . At peace now
Chris and Elaine

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 08:27

Sorry to hear this Paul, but hopefully you can have some peace for yourself now. You did everything you possibly could and more

Arthur

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 09:06

Thinking of you Paul. X

BFN

Julie

NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 09:06

Hi Paul,

I'm so sorry to here about your dad. Treasure the wonderful memories you must have. He is at peace now.

Please send my love to your family.

I hope you're ok. Feel free to contact me anytime.

Steve

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 09:11

Sending condolences to you and your family, Paul.

Love, Fiona.

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 09:29

Please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your dad.

You were a wonderful son to him.

My thoughts are with you and your family.

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 10:05

My condolences to you and your family. A brave fight from a brave man. Your care for him was exemplary and surely eased his passing in the knowledge your love and thoughts were with him.

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 10:49

My sincere condolences go to you and your family Paul...

I went through a similar experience many years ago with my father

Luther

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 11:23

I am so sorry Paul.

I only hope that if either myself or John are ever in the same situation, that our son will do for us what you have been doing for your mum and dad.

Best Wishes

Sandra

We can't control the winds - but we can adjust our sails

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 11:53

Paul

My sincere condolences to you and your family. Your Dad is now at peace.

You have been such a wonderful son to him and will continue to be for your Mum. I have the upmost respect for you.

My thoughts are with you

User

Posted 07 Sep 2015 at 16:27

Paul, I have been following this thread with teary eyes (my Father slipped away earlier this year)!

Please accept my sincerest condolences.

I will pray that he rests in peace!

You have been a loving son, which is all any Father could ask for!

Look after yourself!

Pablito

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