PSA 7.3 - referred to urologist

Okay, brief, appearance because I cannot NOT reply to someone who is offering "best wishes" despite all the serious s*** you have been/are going through. Dunniz - one word, "respect". Sounds clichéd, but it doesn't even get close to how I'd sum up what I feel for individuals like yourself. 

I remember Luther, on here, one day saying that all of this would eventually make me into a better person; I'll let people know if that day ever comes.

Thanks to everyone,

H

I probably have to agree, but I miss the people and I miss posting. Love to all.

H

Hi Haig - I was in the same position 3 months ago and, in fact, in the same position now! I have a bunch of urinary symptoms with no issues at night and my mind is torturing me far worse than my body. mpMRI for me was PI RADS 3 and my PSA 0.7. I had another mpMRI last week and get the results Friday as the Urologist wanted to be thorough and because I have a 'firm' prostate on DRE and Prostatitis symptoms.

When I saw him first after the MRI and a CT scan of my abdomen he told me if it was his prostate he wouldn't biopsy. I suspect this week I will find I will need a biopsy as the symptoms have not changed at all.

I know where your mind is racing to - I have done the same a lot! Missed diagnosis, low PSA means nothing, MRI's missing things, CT scan not reviewed properly etc...and I have been treated for stress too.

Your results are great, but of course there is always the 'what if'. I have decided to do my very very best to ignore the what if voice in my head and try to just carry on. With urinary symptoms I am constantly reminded during the waking hours but keeping busy really helps.

I have no idea what is in store for me yet, but wanted to add another voice to 'you are not alone' crowd with this. The tests, waiting, diagnosing, then 'equivocal' results, then waiting, more tests etc...it takes its toll. Try not to be too hard on yourself and also consider that you are suffering a kind of PTSD which is why you may continue to doubt the diagnosis. You are re-living some of the painful thoughts again and again...it is a vicious cycle.

Many have said it, try to move on, and sadly (I am 51) as we age we are more prone to nastiness in all its forms, but a good friend of mine suffering from Lymphoma tells me to take one step at a time, not to try and predict or put odds on survival! Learning to accept uncertainty and even to accept the entirely natural event of one's own demise is something we humans have made a pigs ear of in the last 100 years!

Take care now,

Mark

Nice to see you back here again with your imagined illness. You are always welcome.

Most men here would love to be in your position, free of cancer, but with what I call ‘a bit of trouble down below’.

Have you seen a doctor about your hypochondria yet?

Best wishes, as ever, and kind regards.

Cheers, John.

Chris & John,

Hello again. Chris, I feel that I have very much "outstayed my welcome" on the forum and I get that. I have been given an "all clear" and that, in many ways, should signal a "clear off" on my part. I hope to move on mentally, and in certain ways I have, but I still do not understand why people (& I include family) will not entertain the possibility of a false negative. Anyway, I will stop my postings (right now, it is better for me mentally to keep away) and only really came on to acknowledge your replies; both of you have always been a major support in your different ways. I hope to one day help out in a tangible way myself - I am hoping to set up something in the future to raise money for Pca by doing something whacky that parents can sponsor. Right now though, I still have that "what if" voice Mark talked of periodically gnawing away and at certain moments just think that the "all clear" was nothing other than a 'stab in the dark diagnosis'.

John, no, I am yet to see the GP, although as I say, I am in a better mental state in the main, although it may not appear so reading this!

Best wishes to all of you and hey, West Ham beat Arsenal on Saturday, so I have to allow myself some joy!

Haig

Edited by member 14 Jan 2019 at 20:03  | Reason: Not specified

Once its gone brown the more you get rid of the quicker it will clear. Just keep on getting rid.

Cheers

Bill

Thanks guys that's helped, HB had  go at "clearing the pipes" 5 days post biopsy, expected a rose tint but got ketchup red!!! 7 days post biopsy now rust red!

Thanks John, as always.

H

Thanks Bri. I appreciate your words, but I think I would have to say that pretty much everyone has been supportive of me on here in their own way. I think I became almost manic with anxiety through waiting for each set of results -  everyone has been through it, but all seem to have handled it better than me. There was nothing anyone could say to reduce my apprehension and stress; I think people were right to lose faith in trying to help me - they had all tried hard enough, despite me not even having a final diagnosis. 

Then I got the news of an "all clear" from my targeted biopsy and yet continued to doubt this result (I still do) - for some, this was too much & I understand why; I get the 'dream result' and yet I continue to question the validity of it, I continue to let stress dominate my life. For some, this was seen as madness on my part. 

I am better now, mentally, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't still doubt my results. I have been advised by uro to have another PSA in a year's time; I reckon he is making a clinically unsound decision in suggesting an entire year. Anyway, I don't have the courage or moral fibre to start this all over again before the year's out, so I'll go with him on this one.

All the best with your own treatment and I am very appreciative of your kind words, Bri. 

Haig