Continence problems

Hi Tony

I'm in the same boat, my catheter came out on 17th March and I have leaked in the same way. I'm OK at night and mornings are sometimes OK but I leak when I move around. If I go for a walk it seems to flow with every step until my pad is absolutely soaked and heavy.
I am making myself go out and see people(wearing the right pad) as otherwise I'd go insane.

Everyone says its early days and can take a long time to sort out. Some have seen changes after 4 weeks as I think that's when some stitches dissolve. Sometimes it seems to take a lot longer to improve.

Yeah, you shouldn't overdo the kegel exercises which is frustrating as you feel you want to do more to fight it. I'm trying to walk as much as I can wearing heavy pads and doing other gentle stretching around the pelvic area/legs to keep everything strong as I can. I think it takes time to see benefit from the kegels as everything is still healing.

I think for now it's a question of patience and getting your head round it(I'm finding it very depressing but doing my best to remain positive.) There are lots of muscles and nerves that take time to heal and so we have to let them get on with it.

A good diet is important. I'm avoiding alcohol ,coffee, chocolate, citrus, spicy food, too many tomatoes, salty foods and trying to eat fresh veg chicken fish etc- anything that could annoy the bladder is avoided as much as possible. 

In the morning I'm trying to go without a pad for as long as I can to stop my brain getting reliant on having a pad and it just makes me feel a bit more normal too....

Hope things improve quickly for you(and me!)

Good luck
Mike. (Ps lf I get to the 6 week point and it's still bad I'll ask the surgeon to see a uro physio and have electric stimulation of the sphincter)

Edited by member 03 Apr 2025 at 14:43  | Reason: Not specified

Yes it's the not being able to enjoy walking that gets to me. I'm a keen mountain biker and run but I knew I wouldn't be able to do those for a while so thought I would at least enjoy walking!

I go for a 20 minute short walk before breakfast or drinking anything much as I find I leak a lot less then and psychologically that helps.......also walking slowly. Later in the day I'll do a 40 minute walk at normal pace and with small hills knowing that I will pretty much lose all of my bladder. I carry a spare pad just in case but usually waddle back with a full one between my legs, which isn't nice but I need to exercise somehow.

I have been to see friends for a drink(water!) wearing a heavy pad just in case but as I'm mainly sitting it's not much of a problem and gives you confidence to go out a bit more. I forced myself to go to the supermarket (woohoo) again with a heavy pad and leaked into whilst walking around realising that no one else has a clue. I'm going to a cafe to meet friends in a bit. I let all my friends know exactly what I'm going through and so meeting with them really helps with the negativity of it all. It's worth being prepared and getting out where you can otherwise life is just too much on hold I feel. I know it's easy to say but you shouldn't be embarrassed, you have been through a really tough and complicated operation with depressing side effects, people should be able to understand that. It is a strange thing, incontinence, as it makes me feel vulnerable and seems to put a dent in my masculinity - that I need to get over to get through this!

Hi Guys,

The effect of the surgery with regards incontinence is different for us all but hopefully my experience will give you some hope.

I had my RARP on 1st October 2024 with catheter removal on the 15th. Oh my god did floodgates open. I was on at least 5 pads a day and a fresh pad for the night.

I did my pelvic floor exercises 3 times every day but nothing seemed to improve. At about the 6 week point I noticed I was passing “bits” in my urine. Checked with the nurses and they said this was normal and was the clips used in surgery dissolving.

Since that point I’ve seem huge improvements, to the point where now at approaching 6 months since catheter removal I am completely dry during the day (unexpected sneezes can sometimes have a say in that, though even then it is only a couple of drops that leak out).

I still wear a pad for bed but now they seem almost completely dry, sometimes there will be tiny signs of the odd little leak but nothing like it was (before Christmas my nighttime bad would be sodden and heavy)

I realise none of this helps you guys for where you are right now, but hopefully this gives you a small crumb of hope for the coming weeks and months.

I do believe they say that 6/7 months is the average time for full continence to return so you guys are still at a very early stage.

Good luck guys, you’ve got this.