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User
Posted 25 Jan 2015 at 17:39
Just saw this and thought how true it is....For all who have lost loved ones

“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” 

― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Take care

Bri

User
Posted 25 Jan 2015 at 17:39
Just saw this and thought how true it is....For all who have lost loved ones

“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” 

― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Take care

Bri

User
Posted 26 Jan 2015 at 16:31
That is a lovely quote Brian and says in a few sentences how i feel.

Carol and Fiona I think of you two often our paths ran along the same track at the same time and ended up in the same horribe place so I hope you are both like me and emerging slowly just one day at a time. I just cannot understand anyone saying they feel a better person after losing their husband, partner or nearest and dearest I most definitely do not. I feel stronger and have more resilience, possibly a bit more determination and a kindling desire for adventure, an overwhelming need to try and help others in all sorts of different ways but a better person? not a chance Mick was the other half of me so at the moment I am probably only slightly over half the person I used to be, there is a huge empty space that I try to fill with anything I can hoping that some of those things help to heal me. Those things that do will stay as part of my new life those things that don't will be discarded along the way. As the quote says I will never be the same again and in truth,I dont think I ever want to be.

xx

Mandy Mo

Edited by member 26 Jan 2015 at 20:02  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 26 Jan 2015 at 10:59

Lovely quote, Bri !

I find people try to be kind and I appreciate it but they sometimes come out with all sorts of platitudes maybe because it's so hard to know what to say !!

Those who have helped me most are the ones who have just let me talk about my anger and frustration, my complete cynicism over any purpose to life and the sense of how damn unfair the world is, without needing to say anything  to try to be comforting.

I have to laugh at those who told me 2015 will be better ! On Jan 2nd a motorist went straight into the side of my beloved VW Transporter which I could well  have done without then on Jan 12th I had to have my old dog, Zari, put to sleep, again, there was a sort of black humour about it  as I was able to give her a much better end of life than the NHS gave Neil  !

I dont feel the need to say I have learned anything or am a better person after the experience of Neil's death, as some do, it just feels absolutely wretched !

However, this year, if everything goes to plan, I am determined to have another collie pup, I always used to threaten Neil with another one, I cannot imagine what the last four months would have been without my dogs, and for them I am utterly grateful !

Carol, I am thinking of you and dear Eric.

Fiona. xx

Edited by member 26 Jan 2015 at 11:00  | Reason: Not specified

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User
Posted 26 Jan 2015 at 00:23
Thank you Brian

Carol x

User
Posted 26 Jan 2015 at 10:59

Lovely quote, Bri !

I find people try to be kind and I appreciate it but they sometimes come out with all sorts of platitudes maybe because it's so hard to know what to say !!

Those who have helped me most are the ones who have just let me talk about my anger and frustration, my complete cynicism over any purpose to life and the sense of how damn unfair the world is, without needing to say anything  to try to be comforting.

I have to laugh at those who told me 2015 will be better ! On Jan 2nd a motorist went straight into the side of my beloved VW Transporter which I could well  have done without then on Jan 12th I had to have my old dog, Zari, put to sleep, again, there was a sort of black humour about it  as I was able to give her a much better end of life than the NHS gave Neil  !

I dont feel the need to say I have learned anything or am a better person after the experience of Neil's death, as some do, it just feels absolutely wretched !

However, this year, if everything goes to plan, I am determined to have another collie pup, I always used to threaten Neil with another one, I cannot imagine what the last four months would have been without my dogs, and for them I am utterly grateful !

Carol, I am thinking of you and dear Eric.

Fiona. xx

Edited by member 26 Jan 2015 at 11:00  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 26 Jan 2015 at 16:31
That is a lovely quote Brian and says in a few sentences how i feel.

Carol and Fiona I think of you two often our paths ran along the same track at the same time and ended up in the same horribe place so I hope you are both like me and emerging slowly just one day at a time. I just cannot understand anyone saying they feel a better person after losing their husband, partner or nearest and dearest I most definitely do not. I feel stronger and have more resilience, possibly a bit more determination and a kindling desire for adventure, an overwhelming need to try and help others in all sorts of different ways but a better person? not a chance Mick was the other half of me so at the moment I am probably only slightly over half the person I used to be, there is a huge empty space that I try to fill with anything I can hoping that some of those things help to heal me. Those things that do will stay as part of my new life those things that don't will be discarded along the way. As the quote says I will never be the same again and in truth,I dont think I ever want to be.

xx

Mandy Mo

Edited by member 26 Jan 2015 at 20:02  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 26 Jan 2015 at 17:50

Well said Mandy...

Thinking of you all who have lost your loved ones.

Bri x

 
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