Dad recently diagnosed. Looking to support him.

Hello everyone!

Just joined today, with my Dad given the news of a prostate cancer diagnosis. I have joined to gain some information as I feel we are slowly being fed information.

A bit of background, my Dad (66) has been getting blood tests from December 2023-February 2024 and his PSA levels were increasing at every one. He had an MRI scan in February 2024 (no results given to us) then was sent for Biopsy on 7th March 2024 (he had 22 samples taken) He was told at the appointment on 7th March, that he had Prostate Cancer, mainly on his left side of the prostate. (A bit annoyed he was told this on his own when I was sitting in the waiting room - I don't think he took in a lot of information which is understandable). Finally he attended on 25th March 2024 for a bone scan.

Fast forward to today when he received a phone call from the lead urologist cancer nurse to discuss biopsy results (something I feel should have been a face to face appointment but nevertheless) the nurse confirmed that he knew he had prostate cancer then went on to say it was on the verge of aggressive at Grade 4 with a Gleason scale of 8 and that she would send further information out in a letter to describe all of this and she also mentioned that the MRI scan shows it is advanced in the prostate and has spread to a lymph node in his pelvic area but thankfully not to his bones - his bone scan was clear.

His case has been discussed at MDT meeting and if his scans show no further spread it is something they will be 'looking' to cure for him as the nurse put it.

The nurse said she will now get him booked in for CT scan but I'm feeling very much like we've been left in limbo now with is the hard part - hearing that it is on the verge of being aggressive makes me feel like they should be dealing with this quicker and getting treatment started. I wasn't with him when he took this phone call and he never really asked any questions.

Discussions were had with the nurse with regards to two forms of treatment (which have the same cure rate she said) - either surgery to remove the prostate or hormone therapy and radiotherapy but she did say because it is in his lymph node this wouldn't normally wouldn't be something that would be surgically removed.

I have spent the majority of my day at work reading publications and information and feel he should have been given more information (of course I am aware it will probably come in due course and perhaps I am being impatient) sorry for the long post, I am probably just venting with worry also but I am just trying to gain as much information as I can to best know how to support him through this time, if anyone has been given a similar diagnosis I would love to hear your experiences.

Thanks in advance for reading and any advice.

Lyndsey

Important to understand that 'aggressive' doesn't mean what it sounds like. 'Aggressive means that it is a Gleason 8 or more and / or that the PSA is over 20. It doesn't mean that there is any urgency to treat it - prostate cancer doesn't go galloping around his body in the matter of the few weeks that diagnosis takes.

As the nurse specialist has indicated, surgery and radiotherapy are remarkably similar in terms of success rates for a man with contained cancer. However, if the diagnosis stays at it is, it seems your MDT considers that surgery would not get all of the cancer and your dad would need radiotherapy anyway so they are recommending that he just go straight for the RT. It seems pointless to risk the significant side effects of surgery if it is unlikely to be successful. The CT scan uses a more sensitive tracer and will hopefully confirm that there are no other sites affected and may even conclude that the lymph node is clear, in which case the surgery option might come back on the table.