A place to have a chat.

Well, chatting is the main purpose of local peer support groups.

Exactly what any one group does varies enormously, and you choose which activities you're interested in or not. This tends to change depending where you are in your treatment pathway or post-treatment. Before and during initial treatments, you are likely absorbing support experiences from the group. Some time after diagnosis and initial treatment, you may find you can usefully support newer members who have just been diagnosed based on your experiences and what you've learned along the way.

All do chatting.
Some also have WhatsApp and/or Facebook private groups for online chatting.
Some offer 1-2-1 support.
Some do presentations by clinicians.
Some do presentations which are nothing to do with prostate cancer, e.g. maybe local interest.
Some do pub evenings, coffee mornings, etc.
Some do walks (talk and walk).
Some offer exercise classes, complimentary therapies (massage, aromatherapy, acupuncture, meditation, etc).
Some do awareness events where you advise the public on getting checked.
Some run PSA testing events for the public.
Some are specific to some activity like cycling.
Some are specific for LGBTQ+, or black men, etc.
Some hospital ones are specific for their own patients (while other hospital ones are open to other patients).
Some are patients-only (particularly some hospital run ones), while others welcome partners and carers too.
Some are for partners only, and not the patient.
Some do fundraising for prostate cancer charities, or to buy equipment for their local hospital.

Everyone who comes along for an initial chat after being diagnosed says how wonderful the experience was, and they wish they'd come along earlier. We will usually chat with a new patient for typically 60-90 mins when they first approach us, which no clinician has time to do. We can go through things they should be considering, and what to ask their clinicians.

Also there are national and international support groups on Facebook, dedicated forums, or Zoom.
Some UK ones are specific to a particular treatment, such as Active Surveillance, Brachytherapy, or Advanced Prostate Cancer. (International groups will discuss protocols and treatments not available or applicable in the UK, because these are different in every country.)

Edited by member 21 Feb 2024 at 13:21  | Reason: Not specified

Adrian

It is a very good idea to meet face to face for a coffee but difficult to organise. The only way one can do is to let people here know where you live and suggest a meeting place and see if there are some who are within a short driving distance, say 10/15 miles, of mutually convenient spot. In earlier days following my surgery, a face to face meeting with other men would have been useful. Most of the meeting groups are too far from where we live. Of course it is up to the administrator of this site whether he/she will allow us to reveal  postcodes so that a meeting can take place.

Hi SpongeBob 

so sorry to read this, I really feel for you as I have been in exactly the same position, even down to the repeating a year. 

When I discovered he had never left his room after the first term, I can’t begin to tell you how devastated I was, but I guess you know!

anyway for me that was 8 years ago and I just wanted to reach out and tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel. My son did complete his degree using some credits that he had managed to get and two years with the open university. 

he didn’t accrue more debt at this time as he managed to self fund by working as well.

He did rebuild his life and I couldn’t be prouder of him.

hope everything works out  for your son 

Adrian, I think it’s a good idea. Sometimes you need to chat about normal life, like your hols or something. As you say like being down the Pub. (Hopefully not collapsing in one as I did last week 🤣) .

I do tend to ramble on in my posts about other stuff so I suppose I’m doing that a bit already. 

Decho, Maggies sounds really great but none anywhere near me. I might look up McMillan opportunities as my counselling took place in their offices and they were so friendly. I went to a hospital arranged meet up which was good but it turned out 90% of the guys were way older than me and were not G9s and their PCa was mostly under control so I didn’t feel like I was really part of it 🤷‍♂️. 

Cheers

Phil

That's exactly what I've been trying to explain. Thank you putting it much more clearly than I've done. 👍🙂

Hello lads!

My weekend was largely spent getting stuff done in the garden. Gave the lawn its first cut of the year, and planted two new trees. Always fancied a Peach Tree so we now have one in prime position in the middle of the lawn. After that lot, and a couple of hours clearing out the horses stable, my back is buggered today 😂

The rugby was promising for the first 10 minutes, then went downhill rapidly........

Life is pretty good at the minute, although I expect to start getting twitchy again over the next couple of weeks, as my next PSA test looms on March 19th.

I think I probably met you! 😂

Regarding the retirement chat: I was 62 when is was diagnosed and was in a bad place for a while and probable not 100% on it at work although everyone was great and they allowed me to leave early for my RT everyday. I have worked as a consultant/agency since 1978 and always thought i’d created enough little ‘secret ways’ that I was indispensable. Ha ha , what a laugh. Our boss came over from Germany and told us all we were safe and then 1 day later my English boss called me in and gave me 10 days notice. I was the oldest and with the cancer he thought i’d be the first to go anyway. Bit of a blow as I wasn’t ready, mentally or financially. We had a big house (too big after the kids left) and a rental property but I couldn’t really sustain the big house without a reasonable income. So we decided to sell up and move to the rental , which was only a 100m away anyway. Been here a couple of years and wished we’d done it earlier. The new house is much newer and smaller and so easy to live in. We bought a new place to rent out for an income as being Ltd company all my working life my pension wasn’t up to much. 

In retrospect I’m happy with how its worked out , although my wife went back to her old job part time as they conveniently asked her back. I don’t know how I did stuff whilst working full time.

With careful planning we can still have nice holidays and days out etc.  We do consider ourselves lucky in that regard. But I still worry about when I’m gone and my wife has to mange on her own without my state pension etc. So its a juggling act really between enjoying life now and making sure I leave enough behind.

So, if you are in any position to retire I would do it. I did love my job and miss the chaps and the coffee ! …. But its like a new stage of life being retired and I do still catch up with some of the guys. And as we all find out there’s only so many days in a life and we need to use them as best we can.

So got some jobs to do now. Shame the suns not out , bit miserable here, but at least its not raining.

Take care guys, ( AV 0 Spurs 4 😜)

Phil

Edited by member 11 Mar 2024 at 18:53  | Reason: Not specified

This thread is becoming, the Adrian, Phil, Ian, kev and Jackson show. They'll nickname us the Jackson Five.🤣

I hope more people join in. 

Hi Phil

Sorry to hear you're feeling down today. Hopefully the painting will distract you and take your mind off things. Is it gloss or emulsion? I bloody hate gloss painting with a vengeance, but don't mind slopping some emulsion around!

Ref. the Chemo, the only input I can offer is that my younger brother had to undergo intensive Chemo last year, prior to surgery for oesophageal cancer. I won't say he had a bundle of laughs, but he was pretty positive about the whole experience. He said the actual infusions themselves were fine. He felt rough for a couple of days afterwards, but on the whole I don't think it was as bad as he expected it to be. I don't think he enjoyed looking like Uncle Fester when his hair fell out, but he didn't have much to start with! Seriously though mate, he said it wasn't as bad as he thought it was going to be, and, more importantly, it did its job 👍 

Hey up chaps,

Spongebob here, just getting to the end of a fabulous 2 week jolly on the Isle of Mull. Spent the time ambling about soaking in the peace and quiet 😎,spotting wildlife and experiencing the magnificent scenery.

I’ve been waiting the best part of 20 years to be able to go away on a family holiday like this outside school holidays. I’ve spent many a time when I was at work dreaming of it as a kind of utopian paradise. Well it just shows what little I know sunny Jim. Because the place is packed, whereas in the past the one track roads around the island were a delight to drive on not now in June, there’s a car or camper van at every turn making it almost impossible to drive anywhere 😖. Worse than that is that the weather in June is just the same as it always was when we used to come here at Easter and October half term - yes, arctic conditions 🥶.

Still we are having a great time, it’s good to have a family jolly. There is a kind of sadistic pleasure you can get as a dad to wupp the family at scrabble and trivial pursuits 😬. The kids though, aren’t exactly kids anymore. I couldn’t even pass them off as kids when paying for today’s boat trip to Isle of Staffa. Mind you the eldest is 6ft 2. I did suffer a doddery moment though, tripping up whilst stepping onto the boat, nearly falling into the sea, and almost taking the wife in with me. I’m turning into a right old git and I’m only 63 fcal. It was tremendous on Staffa, for getting a geological fix and even better to watch the puffins. I got my old Nikon out the loft for this possibility and got some great photos of the little blighters. They really are the most photogenic of all creatures. 

The impact of PCa treatment never far away though. Sitting in a sun room with a belle view, typing this whilst in the middle of a hot swet, dripping down my face (much as it does when England persisting in passing the ball about at the back all the time). Yesterday morning, when I got up I thought I’d had a relapse back to chemo times, my energy levels totally crashed, so I went back to bed for most of the day much to the family’s delight for getting them out of doing a walk. I blame it on the prostap, but then it could just be down to overdoing it on the fresh air, wilderness walks and the odd beer or two.

Anyway, ramble overwith, carry on, enjoy the footy ⚽️.

Spongebob

What a lovely peaceful day we've had today.

My grandkids, boy 10 years, and his sister 6 years, live nearby. My daughter and her husband work full time. So during the school holidays we have them two days a week. We used to have them a lot more often but our age and health problems have gradually reduced our child minding duties.

We took the lad to a nearby market town this morning for his goalkeeping training session. I watched him for an hour, whilst the wife took his sister to a nearby park. It was great to see how his love of footy has increased his self confidence and helped his physical development. He looked good and trained hard.

At lunch we got fish and chips and ate them at another park nearer home. The kids had worked up great appetites and ate every bit.

Next we did a bit of golfing on a rugby pitch next to the park. Both kids were knocking golf balls about for a couple of hours and hit a few good shots.

Then back to our house, stopping for an ice cream enroute. They both earned their pocket money by helping me to a bit of gardening. Then back to their place until their mum finished work.

It was such a simple but enjoyable day and I loved every minute of it. They both had me in stitches at times, coming out with things that kids say.

I adore my grandkids.

😆 Yeah, I went to the grandkids primary school sports day and was told there are no winners or losers. What's the point I thought. 

Cheers Adrian

Yup, the incontinence is pretty awful at the minute. Had a review call with the prof today though, and he says its very early days, especially as they sent me home with a UTI which took two weeks of antibiotics to shift!

I think the beer tray plate was a great idea. I bet you got some envious looks as they all tucked in to their half sandwich. I bet your mate would have found that funny too!

Kev - Sarries? really? 😂 To be fair they're a great side, and I've had some laughs with their fans over the years, including in the eel pie in Twickenham after this years final 👍

Phil - you must be posh, eating in the clubhouse. I'm normally at the curry stall in the village before a game. Good luck with going alcohol free. I did it over 3 years ago. It was only supposed to be for 12 weeks, but I felt so good I never went back!

It is funny isn't it how you feel after the operation. Initial shock at how fast it had progressed, then relief that he said he got it all out, then the realisation that until they test my PSA in 4 weeks I wont really know if it worked. Then of course there's the old "will it come back" question. With T3a there's more chance I will end up having more treatment at some point I suppose, but who knows.

For now, I will keep reminding myself that you have to be alive to pee in your pants 😬

Before my mate was posted to Germany, he was at a RAF camp in Norfolk. I used to go up and he’d sneak me in and id stay overnight and eat in their Canteen. Can’t believe we got away with it. This was Mid 70’s.

We’d occasionally go over to USAF Alconbury and sneak in there too. Fantastic Disco and burger joints. I do love a dance and i was up on the floor with the US guys and gals. Was magic. None of my mates were ever dancers. When i met my missus she was 15, shy and wouldn’t dance. Her brother was a DJ and so id end up dancing with his girlfriend to get people up at the beginning.

Still feeling very fatigued so not up to any jobs yet. Struggling to get up the stairs at the moment. Not eating much so that’s probably not helping either. Felt a bit lightheaded this morning so probably not a good ides to do the cutting in at the coving up the steps ….! Hoping this is all worth it. Going to ask at my next chemo if it’s normal to feel this bad. Not sure i could go through this again and I’ve got 3 more sessions to go yet.

You guys are keeping busy. Makes me feel tired ….. Leaf Hoover is a great tool and Im sure the scarifier is great as well if you use it properly.  Just so grateful our new garden is smaller and easier to maintain than our last one.

Keep it up guys,

Phil

Afternoon gents! Apologies for my prolonged absence from the pub. I decided I'd try and distance myself from anything cancer related for a while, in the hope that I would be able to forget about it. Needless to say it didn't work.  The ongoing incontinence and ED issues post surgery, make it impossible to forget, and I was just missing out on the banter on here! So I'll pull up a bar stool, and have a nice flat pint of Bass please.

Kev, I see you expecting another grandchild. Congratulations mate, I've got four in my collection so far, and they keep me sane. I see you are also re-flooring a bathroom. I ripped up the tatty laminate in our en-suite the other week, thoroughly expecting to be having to replace it. But surprisingly, the floorboards didn't look too bad given their age (old bit of the house is Circa 1817), so I am currently renovating them instead of covering them up.

Phil - it's good to see you are feeling a bit better at the minute. Glad to hear you are wielding a paint brush again, as it means you must be on the mend for now. I just spent the weekend painting our utility room, after promising to do it when we move in two and a half years ago....😂

Adrian, looking at the clock, you're probably in the real pub by now, you jammy sod. Have one for me! That's a great idea with the kids trees. We've got a Horse Chestnut growing in a pot, from a conker picked up last year. I'd just assumed we would eventually have to get shot of it, or plant it in the garden to annoy whoever ends up living in our house in years to come.

Cheers all

Ian.

Hi mate

I think it’s a great idea. It would be a good way for those that wanted to, to keep in touch without needing to post an update on results, or respond to a particular question. We’re all in this together, so we may as well share a joke or two, or just bemoan the latest rugby scores….

I hope it takes off!

Ian.

Hi Adrian. When I first posted on here I was very, very reticence about sharing personal stuff. But I saw a thread by a guy who just wanted to vent to relieve his anger and I think it helped him to write it down and for someone to listen. He had been abused as a child, like myself and without him telling us we couldn’t have known him so well and understood his feelings. So don’t be afraid to speak your mind or share your feelings on here. 

So I bit the bullet and didn’t hide it anymore or the fact I was fostered . That awakening happened in my personal life at the same time.

I know it upsets some people and some just don’t want to hear. That’s ok , I get that , but it’s who I am. I am not ashamed or embarrassed anymore by it. That came about by meeting the lovely people on here and at the same time starting counselling. I’m so grateful to everyone. 

I find it amazingly uplifting to be able to talk about ANYTHING on here. No judgement, everyone is so understanding. 
So, let’s have a Pub Thread or threads where we can ramble on about ‘normal’ life  🤣🤣

Take care 

Phil

Adrian, For 9 months I said Maggies was not for me and then my wife cajoled me into going along…and I’ve never looked back. I would say 80% of the men in our group would say the same. I agree though that it’s not for everyone and some men don’t come back.
I think though I maybe misunderstood your post…I think you were talking about an ePub or eCafe not a physical pub which would be difficult to organise I think. This forum is a wonderful but there’s nothing better than real face to face contact and a hug from a fellow sufferer.🤗
Last year I made very good friends with another member on here and we even met up on holiday…it was so uplifting for both us and we talk regularly on WhatsApp, not just about cancer and treatment, but about our families and everything and anything😊

Derek

Still not sleeping then eh pal?

A 5 minute telephone call with a locum is a bit disappointing, especially when they haven't even bothered to get your notes in front of them.

When you said you'd been spreading rock salt, I thought you were getting ready for the big snowfall the BBC keep banging on about. As it was 17 Deg here yesterday, I am inclined to think they may have got it wrong again 😂

Only if people don't use it; hopefully they will...

Edited by member 21 Feb 2024 at 19:32  | Reason: Not specified

I shall be watching the rugby, armed with a few cold ones! Not too sure how the Calcutta Cup is going to go this year mind.....

I could do with giving the garden some attention, but with all this bloody rain it is way too waterlogged to get out there really. Other than that I will be shovelling some s**t at the stables, which seems to have become my job at weekends when I am available. Add in a couple of dog walks and that is about it!

That's about as exciting as my weekends get these days 😂

Hi,

Nothing too thrilling for me this weekend. Glad to report that my issues with having the "trots" immediately following the end of my RT appear to have subsided (for now). I'm now back out walking the dogs up and down the hill. I'll be driving down to Lincoln tomorrow to pick up son no 1 from Uni, he's coming home for his "reading week". Then in the afternoon, I'll be keeping tabs on the mighty Bantams who are playing away at Barrow, hoping for a rare win. Then it'll be my Saturday night curry with some beers whilst watching the Saturday evening footy on telly. Unfortunately, I find rugby a hard watch, I really want to England to win but I expect Scotland will (England more likely to win if I don't watch than if I do). The scoring in rugby does my head in with seemingly easy 3 points being given for the slightest of errors (errors that non-players don't understand), for me rugby would be better if there was more emphasis on scoring tries. 

I really envy you having a grandson playing footy, I would absolutely love that. Unfortunately, I couldn't get either of my two boys interested in football, playing or watching. Instead, they became swimmers and I lost countless hours of my life at swimming pools for their training and racing, including early mornings - nightmare! (advice for any new dads or grandads, be careful when you take the kids for swim, get them to swim yes, but too much and you might end up living there). 

All the ground saturated and boggy around here too. It'll be a couple of weeks before I dust off the old lawn moor and loppers.

Have a good weekend

Spongebob.

Awww that's lovely Phil. Have a great time mate. 👍🙂

Sounds like a great day Adrian. Every single day is special isn’t it as we know we only get so I many days in our lives. Make the most of them all. 

Is it just the two of us sitting in the PC Arms ? 

Phil

Christening was lovely thank you. In a little Church that the in laws go to then to The Royal Jersey Golf Club for a sit down meal. Lots of chatting and a couple of bevvies as I wasn’t driving 😁 , then off to the airport. 1 hour delay plus heavy rain on the way home from Gatwick meant we HAD to call in KFC for some sustenance at 11pm…  Only tastes that good when you’re starving. 🤣

Wonder there’s some way to have photo share thing on the forum? Could be time limited - like maybe a couple of days. 

Phil

Good for you 👍

Phil

Yes Mondays always quiet in the pub game. I worked in Pubs from age 8 as pot boy then behind the bar from 14 up to nearly 17 when i worked in the Pub part of the famous, now gone ‘Gold Mine Night Club’ on Canvey Island. Much better money than milk rounds/paper delivery which i tried as well. Used to get gardening jobs from the locals in the pub as well so was a good little earner. Bought all my own clothes as a kid from that money. Can you imagine me at 15 in my tonic suit, Ben Sherman, red socks and Loake Royals ‘Sharking’ down Southend seafront. 😂Thought i was the Dogs … 🤦. Great time though.😎. Although I don't think it helped much with the CSE revision as i messed all my exams up and had to resit Maths, English and Physics alongside my engineering course at college. Ooops.

Adrian, what did all the sheep do when you went home ? 🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑. Did they have a good night ? Sounds like it if you were still there at 4am…… been to a few nightclubs like that 😜

Bit jittery this morning, appointment not till 4. Trying to prepare myself but my mind wont settle on one thing it keeps flitting about…. Gonna try some Kalms in a minute , they might help.

Cheers guys, take care and have a nice day. 

Phil

Good luck later Phil, I hope it goes well mate.

I think I probably met you! 😂

That is so funny Lyn 🤣. Could well have done … 

Not been to Jersey before, flew over it a few times though. We've booked an airbnb in St Helier. 

That's a good tip about booking restaurants.

Cheers. 

Lyn has frequently posted that she is teetotal.

Thanks Chris 

Just to change the subject, I really thought I had managed to avoid moobs during my six months on Bical. Clearly M&S think otherwise. I got the email from them today:

"Dear Chris,
We hope that you are keeping well.

It has been 6 months since we last saw you for your bra fit, did you know that it is recommended to have a bra fit every 6-12 months?

Breast sizes can change regularly throughout the year, and we would love to invite you back into store or via our online service (where you don’t even have to leave your home) to check that your bra is still right for you. We can also show you some of our amazing new collection.

Please click the link below and book your appointment now: "😡

That's the last time I'm doing the online order for the wife.

As for this virtual pub name, how about The Wonky Walnut?

🤣🤣🤣

Hi Guys

I saw this thread and decided to join in as it is a really good idea. When you realise on all the posts that there is so much knowledge and I guess angst as well I think it is really important that we can all chat and hopefully have a bit of a laugh as well. I worked in mental health for years and despite what people say about men not wanting to talk about their problems I never found that the case. For some it maybe true but I think it is not true of most men. Loads of them opened up to me about their problems... however the ones that didn't did not do so well!!

I know that sometimes I can be a bit aloof and keep things tight to myself... but its not always a good thing to do.  I really believe some find it more difficult to talk to women about their problems. I have never found that myself and probably the opposite. We are all different... thank goodness!!  My lovely wife is so supportive but sometimes I do find it hard to tell her what I really am feeling. 

The idea of a virtual pub/ cafe or whatever is good. We should keep this going and by the looks of it we will. Good luck to you all. We need it! Just going to pour a pint now. Imagine an emoji.

Adrian, It was only a wineglass full, but I have been judged, I've had D & V all day today and my other half is claiming this as another victory in her war against me drinking. (She is weird, she doesn't like the taste!!)

Got to be a cider for me, preferably Stowford Press.

Can say that I've been to many football games in my life. However, I am running an indoor rowing competition between 126 children from 8 primary schools in the morning!

Pass the ear defenders please! 🤣

Got to be a cider for me, preferably Stowford Press.

Uh can’t do Cider. Although I worked in pubs from 8 years old and saw it all I still managed to get hammered on cider at 13 and I’ve never been able to stomache it since….  

Like dark Ale or stout, or if not wine or scotch/whiskey…. Problem is can’t hold the volume when on pints now 🤷‍♂️.. 

Phil

Good one! 🤣

The competition went well. Other than for one of the schools, that couldn't come because a load of ceilings had collapsed due to flooding leading to the school being closed!😱

For those of you who might know concept 2 ergs, the fastest today was 532m in 2 minutes. Pretty incredible for a year 6 girl! (Or boy or any combination 😂)

We had family season tickets at Northampton Saints for years

Been to Saints many times as our friends were shareholders ( I think it was to raise money for the club) and we ate in the little members clubhouse sometimes. 
I'm a football supporter really but loved the way you could sit with opposing supporters. Was there once when I think it was the Bath or Exeter manager climbed into the seats to sort some one out .. 🤣

And my mate said Rugby was for intelligent people and football was for thugs … 🤷‍♂️

Must say though the language at football can be fruity, especially at non league which is my occasional Saturday jaunt as it’s more local than the drag up to see Spurs. 

Phil

That's nice Adrian. We have a Robin nesting somewhere in the garden, and as of this year a Wren has taken up residence! We had a Woodpecker visiting daily last year, but no sign so far this year. Must have got bored with our peanut supply......

I was very fortunate and was in a position to retire early with a decent occupational pension. So I've never had to suffer the disease whilst working. My four kids are aged between 35 and 45 and are all settled in their own places. So I've got very few 'family commitments' apart from amusing my two grandkids who live nearby.

However, after my dad died, in 2017, we moved my then 93 year old, mum in with us. We cared for her until a year ago, when due to her health declining, we had to move her into a nearby care home. I found those 6 years, more exhausting and taxing, than both my careers.

I've often said on here,  that I truly admire how, younger blokes with younger families and work commitments, cope with this disease. Especially those with a poor prognosis. My heart goes out to them.

If I was in their position I'm sure I'd struggle.

Edited by member 06 Mar 2024 at 23:07  | Reason: Typo

Morning Ian,

As you know mate, I made the same decision as you. Based on a biopsy that indicated I had low grade low volume disease. Financial matters weren't a factor, my reasoning was if it doesn't need fixing don't fix it. AS is what my first MDT recommended and I took their advice.

There is conclusive evidence that advisory bodies like NICE are now of the opinion that many with low grade disease are being over treated. I believe that only about 30% of those on AS go onto have to have radical treatment. The introduction of CPG classifications also makes AS a more viable proposition.

I was in the unlucky 30%, but based on the initial diagnosis given to me, I still think I made the right decision to just be monitored.

I recently read this, which seems to support our decisions https://www.cancer.gov/news-events/cancer-currents-blog/2022/prostate-cancer-active-surveillance-increasing

It shows that in America active surveillance was 26.5% in 2014 and had risen to 59.6% in 2021.

I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you mate. I've got a good feeling that you maybe in the majority group on AS that don't need radical treatment.

Edited by member 07 Mar 2024 at 09:09  | Reason: Additional text

This is an interesting thread you started, Adrian. Interesting aspect of PC forums like this is that men and some women get to know one another quite well. Most of us will never meet face to face but it is a 'friendship' which endures. I never thought men could share such intimate details. 

As I sit here I see a robin chasing all the sparrows away but unusually tolerating another robin, and reflecting on what happened on the 9th of March 58 years ago when we got married. We feel very lucky, particularly me, to be still around to enjoy our three grandchildren.

Just to be boring for a moment - if you are a member of the Teachers' Pension Service, you probably need to speak to your union and get some financial advice. A teacher with long membership and an incurable diagnosis can sometimes get the full enhancement but you have to balance that against the 'death in service' payout that you would lose. When I was in the LA, we were always careful to balance the two projected figures before someone retired in these circumstances. The downside of taking ER used to be that teachers weren't allowed to do supply if they had gone on ill health but that may have changed more recently?   

Afternoon all. Haven't dropped in for a few days so thought I would call by and say hello! Nothing much to report. I'm looking after my elderly mother for a few days having collected her on Mothering Sunday. Lots of cancer related talk but not mine this time, just hers. On the good news side, my younger brother got his follow up scan results back yesterday (following major surgery and chemo) and it was all clear! Nice to get some positive news.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

Ian.

Great positive attitude mate and best of luck with your next results.

I've been in the real pub, or in my case working man's club, for the past three days. Been getting on the train at 11:30 everyday into town and having a few whilst nattering with mates and watching the horse racing at Cheltenham. I catch the 18:00 train home, via the chippy. I am a man of simple pleasures.

Luckily I've got an understanding wife.

Incidentally, I've changed from drinking lager to mild and can easily have 6 or 7 without any bladder problems. I've convinced the OH that it's good physio for the old waterworks.

I only bet small just to add a bit of interest to watching the racing. I've got a bookies app on my phone. Yesterday, I picked four horses and did a £1 ew accumulator. No winners but 3 were placed, the fourth horse however, only finished 5th. Unlucky I thought.

On the train home I was checking my phone and was completely surprised that the bookies I'm with were paying ew on the first 5 in the race where my horse had come fifth and that the ew accumulator had paid just under 150 quid. Not a fortune I know, but better than a kick up the *rse.

Thank heavens I hadn't discovered my win in the Club, I'd have probably over celebrated and missed the last train home.

I think I shall reinvest with another bet today. I'll treat my mates to a couple of pints and treat myself to an extra battered sausage on the way home this evening.

I intend keeping the wife sweet with a couple of bottles of vino and a box of chocs.

Life's good when you're winning.😁

PS: It was a close shave travelling back yesterday. Both loo doors on the train were knackered and at half way I felt nature was calling. Fortunately it's only a 15 minute journey I just managed to hold on. I had to jog the 300 yards home and burst through the front door like a drugs bust and run upstairs to the toilet before they could flush the evidence away.

Edited by member 15 Mar 2024 at 06:44  | Reason: Additional text

Hi Adrian. I was also in the garden yesterday laying in 2 sleepers to form a flower bed. Essex Clay - took me all day… but all done now. 
Ironing today as the missus does morning at work. 
Off to get my blood test this afternoon. I’ll have to do a walk in at Oncology as I’ve still not got my consultant appointment for next week through. 
Bit overcast here but quite warm. 

Phil

It was great thanks Phil, if a bit damp! It varies with the results. A couple of them have appeared on the NHS App, but last time I had to phone the CNS after a week. The letter from my consultant actually took 6 weeks to get typed and sent out! Hopefully the App will prevail this time, or I'll be ringing them by Friday.

Ian.

Alright for some Adrian! I do have a couple of cold ones in the fridge for later though 😬

Still no appointment through today so i emailed my CNS and hopefully they can find out if my appointment is booked yet. 
Didnt bother with the blood test as don’t when I’ll be seeing the consultant next 🤷‍♂️. 

Nice evening out seeing Tony Hadley, Swing Tour, great show , great voice. Seen him before and also many years ago with Spandau Ballet with the wife, before kids … ! 
Lovely Greek food beforehand with a few glasses of vino… as you have to 😁

10cc next week , anyone remember them 👍

Edited by member 20 Mar 2024 at 15:56  | Reason: Not specified

Adrian
I know how frustrating it is now. Both my wife and I have had to chase things up . I feel so sorry for people that don't know to do that or not  have the where with all to do it. I have had to fight with Gp's to get referrals on to specialists and my wife has had terrible problems with her eyes requiring constant calls to hurry through appointments .
Having said that the treatment I have had from the NHS for my cancer has been great overall but it may not have been so if I had not had experience of the system and how you have to press all the time.
Poor state of affairs and unfortunately not much hope of it improving. My advice to all is just be persistent as those that are are more likely to get the treatment they need than those that just sit back and wait. It should not be like that but unfortunately it is now. Aneurin Bevan would be mortified if he could see the state of the NHS now.

Mind you I am as well!!

Enough of my rant. have a good evening all

Martin

Edited by member 20 Mar 2024 at 20:04  | Reason: typo

Hi Kev. How funny we are flying back on the 8th too.. 17.55. I’ll look where we’re sitting 🤣🤣
We like St Helier but don’t always visit when we’re over as we are often quite busy. Mostly eat in St Aubin as we can walk. 

There are 2 really lovely garden centres , St Peter’s and Ransomes. Both have really nice cafes. The indoor market in Market St St Helier is worth a visit on a Saturday. 

I’ll ask me boy about nice Pubs in town. If we’re in town we always go shopping in Jacks which has some nice clobber, men’s and ladies. 

Sunday brunch at El Tico is great. Lovely views and cracking food but you might have to wait as it’s popular. It’s on the beach at st Ouens Bay so you’ll need a bus or taxi. Breakfast there is massive. 

Phil

With you two hitting the island at the same time, they might need to bring Bergerac out of retirement! 😁

Cracking day today! Spent the entire day in the garden. Cut the grass, relocated the log pile and rotovated the veg patch. Maybe I’m getting old, but this adds up to a good Saturday these days! Also took my mind off my PSA test results, which I’m waiting for after my latest test last Tuesday. It’s frustrating, as we all know they are available the next day in most cases. 

Well got a call this morning to say my appointment is this Thursday. 
But anxious to say the least . Would be lovely to see my PSA steady or even falling… we will see. 

So to take my mind off it I cleaned my car. 3 hours it took as it’s white and needed the toothbrush treatment in all joints, trim edges etc. looks mint now but I’m too knackered to give it some polish… Maybe this afternoon… 

Can’t wait to get started on the gardens. But as we’ve had the back re-modelled last year we need some new planting and it’s too early. Same goes for front where we’ve had the front paved with a smaller flower bed - itching to get planting… 

Grass could do with a trim though … 

Wasted valuable time trying to watch the pathetic England football display. Won’t get those 2 hours back… And the F1 wasn’t any better. 

Right, better get lunch ready now . I’m starving , it’s the steroids 🤣… 

Take care peeps, 

Phil

Hi Adrian,

I jumped with one of the Red Devils, he wore a prosthetic leg due to losing his in an explosion. He did a lot of air to air camera work and was a really great guy, sadly he died around ten years ago. 

Kev.

Yes it’s an S2A 350 46hp little rocket.

Z250 was a nice little bike. I had a tuned 250 BSA when I was 16 ( 1971) was a little rocket as it was so light. Faster than my mates RD 250… 🤣

Always had bikes from 15. Met my missus  in ‘79 and bought a Suzuki GS1000 cos it was wicked fast and had a nice seat. Had over 150 on the clock 2 up… 😳

Had a Ducati before that - no good for pillion. 

Too old now for it and a body weakened by HT……. So the bikes going soon… 

Hi Debbie and Steve.

Thanks for popping in. What a lovely romantic tale about your daughter. I've been thinking of you two. How's Steve's recovery going?

Late edit. Just seen your update on

https://community.prostatecanceruk.org/posts/t30421-Help-It-seems-to-be-taking-so-long-to-get-to-op-appointment#post294031

Edited by member 28 Mar 2024 at 14:13  | Reason: Additional text

Wow , love all these stories. It’s like we are really getting to know each other. Rather than just what treatment we are on… 

I’ve known you a while now Lyn but that story was a big surprise 👏. 

I bought my girlfriend a car for her 17th birthday … does that count 🤔. Dirty Gerty - the car not the girlfriend… 

Then i bought her a better car for her 18th.  A one year old Cortina Mk4 in bright red. 

Did I spoil her , yes I did and I don’t regret it one bit. Still married after 43 years now 👍

Cant think what I’ve done that scared me the most 🤔… 

Cheers, 

Phil

Ah, so this is where the insomniacs hang out!

Here’s one for you insomniacs who may appear later, what’s your song to reflect your current mood?
I’ve been really struggling this week, my legs feel like heavy lead weights, I continue to get up 6-7-8-9or10+ times every night for a wee but can’t sleep anyway due to the frequent Prostap induced hot sweats. When I have a session getting pi$$ed like I did tonight with the missus watching some Netflix American series rubbish, I spend more time at the bog than in my chair. I’m 61 but feel more like 91. Prostap making me weaker and weak, my favourite football team loses every week and is in the bottom division, seriously now considering getting myself an electric MTB because I have no muscles left to peddle my old trusty mean machine (my pedal bike), but I bet they don’t fund them on the NHS (quite right too). Just putting it out there😬😬😬😬.

I’ve got this song in mind >>>>>
“Just a castaway an island lost at sea, oh

I thought you were in Jersey?

We are here in Jersey. Just back from breakfast out …. Need a rest now. 

Met with KevT at Luton on our way here. Lovely to meet him and his wife. Hope they’re having a lovely time here. 

Always try to be positive, does kinda become a way of thinking . Plus I don’t want to be down for the wife. 

Phil

Hello guys, I’m back 😁.. Been very busy after our weekend away so just sat down for 10 mins between getting the ironing and packing done for this weekend’s trip to visit friends on Exmoor while the missus is at work. She is going too 🤣 , she’s just at work now 🤦‍♀️… 

Was lovely to catch up with Kev and Kirsty. Felt like we’d known each other for a long time. Kev’s right , there’s lots of fast cars and loads of full size Range Rovers which I can imagine getting stuck in some of the roads our son goes down… 

Nice to see spring is coming , everything looking green and fresh. Still got lots of planting to do, front and back as we’ve had a complete re model of the rear garden and front drive done leaving a nice quadrant in the front corner for shrubs etc… Looking forward to going round the garden centres choosing what to buy 😁. Well I don’t choose of course as I haven’t a clue 😳

Still come home to being a bit fretful about next weeks bone scan and subsequent consultation … 😬… Just like a bit of stability for a while so I can get off the monthly checks/consultations as you don’t really get a chance to relax.. I almost want to get the Orchidectomy done so I can come off the HT and steroids. I’m blowing up like a balloon. I’m still able to get a ‘rise’ on the HT but who knows after the Orchidectomy . I suppose it’s anyone’s guess. 

Take care chaps

Phil

Edited by member 11 Apr 2024 at 12:28  | Reason: Not specified

We went to see that years ago when the kids were little, it's fascinating isn't it. Sounds like you're having a great trip 👍

Glad to see the booze cruise never died. Years ago I had a Saab 900 turbo, it had a massive boot which I filled up and drove home with a bottomed out suspension. 

I'll join you for a Guinness or two, we're off to Nor'n Iron this weekend, the Giant's Causeway is next on my list 👍

Fingers crossed for this week Phil 🤞

Cheers,

Kev.

Have a really great time Kev. Northern Ireland is on our list too 👍. Watch those big steps 🤣 I think the Bushmills factory is somewhere near there. 😁

Good shout Phil. Just so happens we're about 15 minutes drive from there, I'll see if I can get on a tour 👍🏻

I don't think I could go to the Giants Causeway. The sight of rigid, upright things, all naturally produced, would make me too envious. 😁 

Maybe they use Invicorp Adrian.. to prevent coastal erosion 🤔 I'll let you know if they sell it in the gift shop. 

Cheers, 

Kev.

Edited by member 18 Apr 2024 at 14:20  | Reason: Added note

Blood test and bone scan tomorrow. See the consultant next week

Update, consultation a week Tuesday now … 

Phil

We managed a trip around the NI coast last year on the motorbike. It is spectacular. Bushmills distillery was on our backup plan for a rainy day. Amazingly we had four sunny days in a row. 

Last weekend I was in Galway and did a few bike trips in to Connemara and up to Westport, again the scenery is amazing. The nightlife in Galway is hectic.

Hi Kev,

I'm glad you enjoyed your tour of Northern Ireland. My younger brother was an RMP and did nine years over there during the troubles.

I remember going out with him when he was on leave. We were pub crawling along Freeman Street in Grimsby, when a passing car backfired. He instinctly dived for cover in shop doorway.

I've only been there was once. Was flown in a Hercules from West Germany to Portadown to give evidence in a Court Martial case.

He did 17 years in the Army, half of it dodging bullets in NI. I only did 3 years, almost, drinking, smoking and sh*gging myself to death in Germany. "That's the luck of the draw" I used to tell him. 😁

Edited by member 24 Apr 2024 at 12:42  | Reason: Typo

Phil, if you're still struggling with the motorbike, my Mrs says you can have her old coil as she doesn't need it anymore 😁

Kev, that made me laugh , 🤣🤣. 

This really is like being down the Pub 👍

Phil

They sent it back!!!! Why?🤔  🤣

Morning Adrian. So sorry my news upset you last night 😢. Especially when you should be celebrating your good PSA result. Brought a tear to my eye. 

I’ve got my Degarelix injection shortly and badminton later. I know some one will ask how I got on and I’ll have to tell them … 🤷‍♂️Maybe I should take biscuits for tea break 🤔

Not sure why they stopped the Abi but not the Degarelix. Wish they changed the steroid back to Prednisone yesterday as well, the Dexamethasone is blowing me up like a balloon. Imagine Michelin man prancing round the Badders court. 😁

I fitted a snazzy remote light switch in the summerhouse and I couldn’t stop playing with it. Like a kid with a new toy. 🤣 Bet the neighbours wondered what was going on.

If I make it to the Virtual Pub mines a double scotch 😁. 

So Adrian I’m telling you to have a good day today 🤪. No worrying about other people , sometimes you gotta concentrate on yourself. You can’t save someone if you’re drowning yourself. 

Take care 

Phil

I never rode a scooter, at least you tried it eh. Saw a few over the weekend probably going to a rally or something. 

Today I've been working in the garden playing at being Bob the Builder. Re-pointing the garage wall because I'm training a couple of vines along it and don't want it falling down. I put a tarp up for some shade but I'm not a fast worker so ended up in the sun again! Luckily the Mrs is WFH so I got her to slap on some suncream. It's almost like being on holiday. 

Cheers everyone. 

Kev.

Adrian, have a great time at your club. Don’t forget to bring the tomato plants home 🤣. Funny you mention Tena but since I had my passing out episode I’ve found I’ve started having a little leak occasionally. I wonder if this is the damage they said could happen a few years after radiotherapy?? Hoping it will get better but it may be permanent. 

Harty, I’m painting the window cill in the conservatory so it’s satin . I found a good paint and it goes on really nice. Slowly working our way round the whole house so I have plenty of emulsion to do as well… 

I’m hoping I cope with the chemo ok. Everyone says it’s not too bad. I’m just keeping my fingers crossed it does the trick and keeps the little b****** at bay for a good while. Great that it worked well for your younger brother. I’m gonna ask about the cold cap. 

I suppose we all get bad days don’t we. Blood test this afternoon in preparation for a chemo nurse call Friday and 1st infusion Monday. 

Off to a garden centre after the blood test so better take a brolly … 

Cheers guys 👍

Phil

That's a well earned cider following a successful tomato plant mission. 👍🏼

Be careful what you wish for. Most of the threads on this forum are about ...

Edited by member 16 May 2024 at 07:44  | Reason: Not specified

My 'Hooray for Invicorp' thread would go viral! 📸 😂

Today’s top tip - If like me you find yourself losing your balance and falling over when standing on one leg putting your socks on in a morning then you can solve this by leaning against the wardrobe or appropriate wall space 🤓 

Great to see you keeping busy Phil, can't remember the last time I saw a kawasaki triple on the road, not that I'm putting any pressure on you 😉

I can see why you're fixing the speakers.. it's so you can blast out Paloma Faith 😁

I need to cut my grass tonight before it starts raining again, the recycling goes this Thursday. 

Cheers everyone!

Kev

Adrian, I take 15mg Mirtazapine every night and it’s magic. Without it I can’t sleep for hours and my mind goes off to some dark places. So I rely on it and it works every night. Maybe speak to your GP ? 
Hope you get it sorted 👍

Phil

Probably sounds a bit daft Adrian, but have you tried a herbal remedy or melatonin tablets for sleep? My wife uses one, I'll report back with the name when I get it.

Great you're feeling okay Phil, hope it stays that way 🤞🏻

Managed to mow the lawn before this week's monsoon so that's a good result. 

The bluetits haven't fledged yet but I reckon they're ready to go. Watching them on the camera, it feels like they're part of the family. 

Cheers,

Kev.

Edited by member 23 May 2024 at 10:25  | Reason: Added note

Hi Pratap,

That is exactly what I would hope for and expect. At both the open and offer holder days we were sold a vision with assurance that students would be actively engaged (even the most ‘nerdy’ of students). We were told as parents to not worry. 
It’s not difficult is it? 10 mins per week just to check the attendance stats of the students under your remit and then to follow up asap on any students that you find are ducking out. Ditto with those who miss assignments.

Thanks very much for your comments, much appreciated, I’m just trying to work out what to do and get a plan of action in place. Priority is sorting out my son, to get him the help he needs and to basically reintroduce him to society and a pathway to work. And I want to engage with the University, at the least I want to try encourage them to review cases like my son’s, to learn from it. Any steps that they can put in place as a result to help other struggling students would be good. I’m thinking of canvassing other parents who have experienced similar with their young people to see if I can get a collective together.

Anyway best get this chat back to gardening 😬. I’ve just cut the grass, and in time to watch the cup final.

cheers

Spongebob

Kids eh?

A few minutes in the sheets (or the back seat of a car) creating them, and a lifetime worrying about them!

Our bluetits fledged Friday morning and were hanging around in a nearby tree. Having watched them on our nestbox camera over the last few weeks they've become family. They don't ask to borrow the car or money though, but we still worried that they might not all make it, especially with two days of monsoon rain.

Anyway, not to brag, but we're now in a villa on Lanzagrotty with the eldest and grand daughter. Nightmare drive to Gatwick though, had to go the long way round when there was an accident on the M25. Just made it in time to get some use out of the lounge, the highlight being a pancake machine. 

As for gardening, I can't help myself, I've already gone round picking up bits of palm tree. 

Salud!

Kev.

Hi Pratap, 
Excellent, many thanks for taking the time to do this. 
I’m grateful for this chat, reading all your comments about this predicament has given me some comfort. It’s a good example of the value that this site provides.

cheers

Spongebob

Ha ha - yes, trying to learn a lesson by keeping off social media after a few drinks 🤔
Very touching story about your mum. My mum is 90 this year, she used to be very active and always bright as a button. She’s always read books, tons of them. The last few years haven’t been good for her as she has lost her mobility, ironically seems to have originated from her being pulled over by her dog whilst out on one of her long dog walks. I’ve been amazed by her dogged determination to get on with it. She still orders us all around and tells us off even though me, my brother and sister all in our 60s 😬😬.

Coincidentally, I was reading an article about end of life experiences in the Tory Mail this morning. Very interesting, this nurse describing what she’s experienced whilst caring for end of life - people seeing a bright light etc. It would be nice if there really was a heavenly place that we will end up going to - if so let’s hope that you can get a decent pint there and watch a decent game of footy ⚽️🍺

Oops can’t forget to add that it would also be a nice thought that you could get fantastic never ending curry and would be good too to have my mountain bike there, they must have some good trails to ride up there.

Anyway, got to go cut the grass now. Also the missus wants me to put a trellis up of all things 😱

Edited by member 01 Jun 2024 at 13:35  | Reason: Not specified

Hi Debbie and Steve.

Thanks for the update. I'm sorry to hear that Steve is still struggling with  incontinence. I can understand his frustration, but it's great to see that it isn't stopping you travelling and spending time with the family. Hopefully his surgeon will sort something out for him. I hope the second PSA results were good.

Edited by member 18 Jun 2024 at 20:49  | Reason: Reduce text.

Hi Chaps. Sorry been a bit quiet for various reasons. Had me jobs to get on with plus still feeling tired from the chemo.

I’ve watched some of the football and they are mostly entertaining games except England and Scotland. But I’ll be sat watching tonight willing them on to a nice emphatic win… ! I also watched a recording of the F1 and the English guys did OK but it was game over once Vertstapen got in front….. I could’ve had a nice nap instead of watching that.

But we have Wimbledon to watch in July. Hopefully we get a few players through qualifying.

Well I’ve had my breakfast and a nice cup of tea and written this so I’d better get cracking on my jobs. Painted a wood framed mirror for the conservatory yesterday so just gotta put some lacquer on it now. Grass might need a haircut too ….

Enjoy the weather guys 😎. 

Phil

God, I hope so… 

Half pint glass Adrian???

lightweight 😂

Agreed! I do the Glastonbury viewing from the comfort of my sofa! 😂

Well I don’t fancy our chances f we play like that against the Dutch……

Very sorry Adrian, a first class innings, chin up.

It’s my mother in law’s funeral today, she was 92, my wife going through the same range of emotions, it’s very sad.

Regards

Spongebob

Adrian, sorry to hear of your loss, please accept my sincere condolences.

Thanks Chris 

Yes, very disappointed but most of us probably expected, the better team won. I just wish that we played in an attacking manner, have a few shots, cross over the half way line every now and again with some intent etc. The tone was set from the start when we kicked off, pass back to Pickford, hoofs up field to the Spanish who then kept the ball for the next 10 mins. We only attacked after we conceded, then immediately sat back again once we equalised 🤡.

When, Walker got injured and looked like he was going to come off, it was Trippier warming up to replace him and not TAA - just about sums up our approach. Can’t help thinking if we’d had the Spanish manager in charge and the Spanish team had Southgate then we’d probably have won. 

Not to worry, there’s always another tournament.

Now, time to get that lawn mower out 😬.

It sounds like its a good job you had them on though.......😬

Don’t worry, I’m not beaten that easily, just need to work out why it happened. It was a desperate situation though, ended up having an uncomfortable close encounter with a bunch of nettles on the side of the road. Luckily there was no passing traffic except for a tractor in an adjoining field, hope that the tractor driver was concentrating on his driving rather than taking in the view 😬

Hi SpongeBob, Yeah looking forward to the new football season. We are up at Tottenham soon to see them play Bayern pre season. Hoping to catch a few league games there this season too depending on my health.. 

Been watching some of the Olympics but coverage seems a bit weird. They’d rather talk about stuff endlessly than actually show the event… 

I like watching the cycling although not really a cyclist. Went to the last session of a 6 day event at the London velodrome a couple years ago and went to the 2012 Olympic mountain biking in Hadleigh. 

Athletics also a favourite. Will make an effort to watch the Para Olympics. Saw the para worlds at the London Stadium and it was awesome . 

The Austria trip sounds great. I wish I had that energy. I will have to get my bike out when I’m up to it. We live not 100 yds from an entrance to Hadleigh Downs Country park with a dedicated cycle path all the way to the Olympic track so quite lucky… 🚴 … , or we have a path along the seawall all the way to Southend. 

I’m chilling in the summerhouse at the moment as plumber fits new rads in downstairs. Still feeling very tired from chemo last Wednesday, and sore from Degarelix injection Friday. Stomach also tender and bloated from the chemo for which they’ve prescribed me Lanzoprazole. So feeling a bit sorry for myself at the moment… 

Oh, also get a bad case of the metal mouth too. Yuk… Couldn’t take the frozen fruit during chemo as they made my teeth hurt too much. Should have persevered as the taste in my mouth is really not pleasant.. 

Oh well, carry on regardless … 👍 Get that Austria trip booked SpongeBob . 

Tale care chaps, 

Phil

My 18 month psa tomorrow as well !

Sorry meant step Grandchildren !

Do you mean the drinks or the sex? 😁

Edited by member 31 Jul 2024 at 19:54  | Reason: Typo.

I cycled down to the lido and swam a few lengths so technically I've competed in the triathlon.. well, by my reckoning anyway. 

Cheers, 

Kev.

It's terrible, you're not even allowed to trip up their opponents or 'question' a close finish. 😁

Edited by member 01 Aug 2024 at 17:20  | Reason: Typo

Hey guys..

Were you injured tripping over dodgy paving?

Call our injury lawyers now!

😁

We'll have to set up a virtual A&E as well as a virtual pub at this rate. 

I'm happy to give it a try, I reckon I could plaster a broken limb to a sheet of plasterboard. Should be a reasonable surface for people to sign their get well messages. 

Cheers, 

Kev.

Hi Guys, 

Adrian, very sorry to hear about your best mate. That must be a blow. I can imagine you visiting helped you both through difficult times. Sometimes you just need to ramble on to someone , you dont need any feedback you just need to let it out.

SpongeBob did you manage to get the planters done before Kickoff?

We managed to wash the wife’s car yesterday although i think she did most of the work. I did the wheels and all the trim bits. Knocked me out so needed a little sleep in the afternoon.

Got as few little jobs today so hopefully i can stay awake..!

Suffering a bit after the last chemo. Metal mouth is absolutely disgusting and I didn’t even have any dinner yesterday as I couldn’t face it. Hoping it starts to ease off today. Even wine and beer taste awful….🤢

Hoping Spurs can give me a lift tonight against Leicester. Shame it’s on Sky as i’ve only got BT sport. Saw some good new recruits the other Saturday at Spurs vs Bayern. Young Bergvall (18) looks the business and i can see him getting a few starts in the Prem.

Right better get on with my jobs now before i nod off …

Take care guys,

Phil

Edited by member 19 Aug 2024 at 10:26  | Reason: Not specified

Hi Chaps,

Very sorry to hear about more grief for you Adrian, the dealer has a habit of dealing out crap cards at times - chin up, here's hoping for some good times to come 🤞.

Yes, Phil, the planters have turned out fine and I did manage to complete the build before kick off 😬. They are two super heavy boxes (90x60x60cm) made out of decking timber and fence posts. Too heavy to lift but means (hopefully) that the wind won't blow the screen over, which I've put on top of the planters. I'm planning to grow some veggies, in fact garlic, onions, herbs and stuff. The planters are too high for the dogs to be able to pee in. The nosey neighbours are not impressed though, the daughter came out to tell me what she thinks about it 😂. Seems to be  annoyed, that they no longer have a view of my patio.

Sounds like you are coping well with the chemo, keeping busy (fatigue allowing), a good tactic 👍. Sounds like you have the metal mouth bad, it got me more towards the end of my sessions. There is some advice in the chats, such as eating pineapples but I just lived with it. You'll be glad to know that the taste buds do return to normal after it is all over.

I'll be watching the footy tonight, expecting big things from the Spurs this season, and even more I hope for some entertainment from 'Postecoglou ball'. It'll be interesting to see how Leicester City get on.

All the best 

Spongebob

Hi guys. Our local recycling centres are all booking only. Seems to work ok here as there’s never a queue. Occasionally you can even book for the same day. 

We have 2 I can go to, one is close but doesn’t take everything. The other one is only 10 mins away . 

I know they also charge quite a lot for ‘trade’ recycling so we always try to separate our waste like metal etc.

I do love a clear out . 😁… 

Cheers

Phil

I felt exactly the same Kev. On the run up to surgery I was completely focused on the procedure itself. After it, I spent a couple of months trying to convince myself that it wouldn't effect my life. Then I hit a wall, realising it had. That period of despondency lasted for a few months.

Since then, I've gradually adapted to a slightly new way of life. I do think it's changed me. My wife says I'm more grumpy than I used to be, and I definitely feel more fatigued. I don't think the tiredness can be related to the prostatectomy, that was 18 months ago. Perhaps it's because I'm still not sleeping as well as I used to, or maybe it's due to other medical conditions. 

Every afternoon about 3pm, I feel completely knackered and usually doze off. Sometimes I even go to bed for an hour or two. Apparently you can combat this by going for a brisk walk, but I just don't feel I have the energy to do this. Plus my legs are knackered, caused by doing too much exercise when I was younger. They make walking unpleasurable.

Gardening gets me plenty of fresh air and a bit of exercise, but even that is becoming more difficult than it was.

I know I'm much more fortunate than many on here, who are having to battle with very unpleasant side effects of their continuing treatments. I keep telling myself how lucky I am, even when I feel that I'm ready for the scrap yard.  

This afternoon I meeting up with three old colleagues. You can guarantee we'll all end up moaning about how ill we are, but it'll pass an hour or two. 😁

Edited by member 22 Aug 2024 at 12:50  | Reason: Additional text

Hi guys. Great posts/stories. 

Both my secondary schools were comprehensives but one of them concentrated on Rugby and were renowned as being a rough team. Us leftovers were thrown a football and told to F off over there .

When I moved school at 13 I got a lot of trouble at the start due to the reputation of our Rugby team. So had to prove myself a few times. Ended up enjoying my time there until me and my little Bruv had to move back to our old school when I was already started 4th year. Couldn’t get my chosen options at CSE so ended up messing them up and had to retake them as GCEs at college.  🤷‍♂️.

The PE teacher at the old school even shouted at me after I threw the Javelin ‘what’s the matter you got Polio or something ‘. Imagine that now 🤣. 

Back to Rugby. We had hospitality at Leicester once and so beforehand was mingling with injured players etc. I felt like such a midget until Austin Healey came over to chat. He’s a tiddler like me 🤣, but hard as nails, unlike me. 

We also have friends who had a box at the old Tottenham stadium, which was lovely but you can’t beat sitting outside with the crowd. But we also did hospitality things there with a meal etc. One day we sat having dinner before the game with Ossie Ardiles and Martin Chivers on our table. Ossie is so down to earth was magic talking to him. My missus said to me ‘who’s that’ I was ‘WHAT’… I have a great photo and us chatting with our wine glasses in our hands. I still can’t believe it 🤦‍♀️… 

Keep your stories going, I love hearing them. It really is like being in our local Pub just chewing the cud. 

Just remembered this. Being older than you guys I remember at one of my (4) primary schools no one had their own boots so you picked out of a box. They looked like walking boots with studs. No fancy boots then … and if they didn’t fit that was tough. Imagine the little cherubs now complaining about a little blister ! 

Cheers guys, my round is it ? 

Phil

Edited by member 23 Aug 2024 at 12:40  | Reason: Not specified

But I joined the police instead. 😁

I have the utmost respect for the police. What a thankless profession it is. I couldn’t imagine  even getting beyond first days training.

When I was 15 I went up to Stafford for an RAF induction test over 5 days. Well I ended up arguing with one of the interviewers and said I want to go home a day early. I didn’t go home , I got the train down to Plymouth to join my parents on holiday. They did still offer me radar technician job but I wanted to be the guy in charge of them all 🤣 What a dick I was. 
Was years later I realised they were testing me to see how I took orders and instructions from seniors. 🤦‍♀️. Not very well it turns out …

Phil

Edited by member 27 Aug 2024 at 16:00  | Reason: Not specified

Well done to your eldest👏

I seem to recall that years ago there was a story going around that scientists had tested a complimentary bowl of peanuts on a pub bar and found that they were contaminated by over 50  urine samples. I suspect,  as most of our customers have PCa, our peanuts would be even worse. 😂

Edited by member 09 Sep 2024 at 17:43  | Reason: Additional text

Hi Adrian,

It has been a bit quiet on here, I've neglected the virtual pub this week as I've been busy with DIY jobs. We recently had new patio doors fitted so I had a step to build, a course of bricks and four large paving slabs did the job, and my back too! Next job will be taking down a studwork wall to create a new kitchen diner. When complete, it'll be great having family round for roast dinners.

As for the garden,  I pruned our small apple tree last winter and now it's groaning under the weight of several massive apples the size of grapefruits. They're ready to eat and taste great. Unfortunately the Mrs is allergic to apples, but she made a tasty apple crumble which is all gone now. I've placed an order for another one. The grapes have swollen up nicely and will be ready to eat in a couple of weeks or so. We have a fuchsia in the front garden that's full of flowers and looks magnificent.

It's great watching grandkids growing up and doing things they enjoy, we have a 10 year old granddaughter, we used to have regular kick-abouts on the green together but she seems to have gone off that now. My son and his wife just celebrated their first anniversary last weekend but aren't in a hurry to have kids yet as they're busy enjoying life.

My Mrs went for an early swim at the lido this morning and came home shivering, she's in a hot bath now.. glad I stayed in bed.

Getting the suitcase out of the loft today, we're flying to Fuerteventura next weekend for some sun and relaxation. 

No-one's touching those peanuts on the bar so I'll have a pint of Doom Bar and a packet of cheese & onion.

Cheers all, have a great weekend. 

Kev.

Edited by member 14 Sep 2024 at 09:26  | Reason: Typo

Hi Phil,

Despite your treatment slightly impeding your workload, you still put me to shame, mate.

Most of my 'Get up and go' has got up and gone.

Keep going mate.

I had a good weekend. Oli's team won 18-0 and they only play 30 minutes each way. He only touched the ball about half a dozen times. I felt sorry for the opposition who looked very disheartened. Their goalie, despite the score, made some fabulous saves. 

Sunday lunch was brilliant the Yorkshire puds were nearly as big as footballs and the beef was tender and delicious 😋 

Edited by member 16 Sep 2024 at 14:43  | Reason: Additional text

Adrian, I like Old Peculiar and usually one of a few ales in the garage fridge along with Spitfire. 

I was gonna watch Saints but instead opted for Jane McDonald in the Seychelles. Not our normal holiday but next year it might be what we need… 

The metal mouth is apparently caused by the taste buds being zapped by the chemo. They say eat ice cubes whilst having the infusion. I tried but they hurt my teeth so used ice poles last time but I didn’t take enough. Everything tastes different and mostly horrible. A few things aren’t too bad like very strong cheese. Most things leave a nasty aftertaste as well so you’re forever cleaning your teeth. At its worst it makes me gag … So, lots of ice poles next time hoping it works a bit. I really do not want to gag during the wedding dinner 🤦‍♀️ next weekend.

I know the next 4 sessions are gonna be hard but I’m trying to think what it’ll be like afterwards and I feel stronger and get my taste back. Just hope I get some good time before the cancer fights back again. 

Really hope you guys on curative pathways get there. Also the guys on HT for life , let’s hope the cancer stays in its cage for many years. 

Take care everyone, 

Phil

Great PSA result SpongeBob, well pleased for you 👍. Keep it up. 

Your Bio is a great read and honest with your emotions. I think it helps to read other people’s Bios as it puts perspective on our own journey. 

I’ve had a cough all last week and so I phoned the chemo nurses Saturday and left a message but suspect the phones aren’t manned weekends. I was worried about the lung damage chemo can cause….😬 . I’ve woke up this morning and it’s not so bad. So just waiting for my callback to see what they say. They’ll phone me anyway tomorrow for my pre-chemo check.

My boy and his lovely missus came round yesterday to give our lounge ceiling 2 coats of emulsion and also to fix up a camera by our front door . Both jobs accomplished whilst I kept out of the way. We are very lucky 🙂.

look after yourselves boys 👍

Phil

Yes, it would be good to go out and have a few pints. Maybe in your YouTube boozer in the Village of the Damned. Made me laugh did that, it's from another universe isn't it. Brings back memories of the old days, when I would regularly see characters like that.  

Hi Guys,

It’s only me 👍. Been supervising the missus on her painting oddessy. Ive been sat watching in all me painting clothes so i feel like im helping. Lounge done except woodwork and cutting in at the cornice. She doesn’t like doing that so my boys coming over to finish that.

I’ve been to Landshut back in ‘78 when i lived in Germany, very nice little town. Visited lots of lovely German towns whilst there although I suppose some might have changed a bit by now… ( and no I wasn’t a squaddie ).  And also brilliant you are getting both sons sorted. Fingers crossed for them both.

Adrian, i can imagine the scene of destruction on the lawn. Ive been there. Never used the scarifyer again. It’s still in the shed. Have a much smaller lawn in this house and we had it returfed anyway and all good so far.

Still feeling rough with the tiredness and shitty mouth and got the trotters this morning. Not that there’s much to come out. Ive existed so far since my last chemo on just breakfast muesli but yesterday I went mad and had 2 crackers and cheese for lunch. Sleeping for England as well. Lost 18 lbs so far in the last month or so. Belly and fat face nearly gone…. But id rather feel better 🤷. Still struggling to even get up the stairs without a rest so no 2 hour walks for me yet. 

We just cancelled our cruise up the Norfolk broads Friday coming as i just couldn’t manage it. Hoping we get a credit note and can do it next year. We cancelled our Ilfracombe wedding trip as well for last week. Pretty gutted for that as the wedding looked wonderful on the beach. Perhaps we were too optimistic….

So looking forward to my last chemo… and hopefully a good while then till the little blighter returns again.

See if Tottenham can cheer me up later this afternoon.

Take care guys,

Phil

Hi Adrian

My back lawn is in need of a bit of TLC, I've been considering scarifying it as approx. 20% of it must be made up of moss or clover (it is around 125 SQ M). I think after your rampaging Rhinos experience, I'll just get some moss killer and sprinkle it around 😬.

It probably could do with a roller too, but the thought of getting one and pushing it around is a bit daunting.

I did treat myself to a new leaf hoover this year though, in anticipation of the whole thing becoming covered in dropped leaves any time soon.

Is your garden sculpture collection still growing?

Good stuff 😬. I’m on a jolly down in Cornwall- god it’s a long drive! Glorious sunshine though, fabulous. Just got back from a nice coastal walk, with fine views to St Micks Mount, dogs having a right old time.

Curry for tea washed down with some Cornish cider. Good luck with the rugby Adrian, hope your team does the business.

Enjoy

Spongebob

330 million potential presidential candidates in the USA and that is the best that they can come up with 😱. Free world democracy in action - God help us all 🙏. 

Hi chaps. I do love reading your little stories and snippets of your life’s. It makes it all the more human than just reading about side effects and pills and treatments… 

Im slowly feeling better now although my Palliative nurse says my kidneys are having a little struggle so I’ve gotta drink more 😳… 

She also thinks that when I see my consultant next week he’ll want me to get restarted on the Chema as soon as possible. Not looking forward to it…! 

Did some painting this morning so having a rest this afternoon. Round youngest ones for tea this evening which will be nice. 

Hope you’re all good 👍 

Phil

That’s good cos I could write up a whole encyclopaedia Britanica series on my HT side effects 😬.

Anyway, Phil you do as the doc says, drink more 🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺😀.

Shame Adrian about young Schmeicel’s team. Trouble with footy, there’s always somebody better at some point. So long as they enjoy playing and winning when they win 🏆. 

I’m just enjoying a jolly in the Lakes, the weather is fabulous, especially considering it’s November. Just did a fab autumnal 5 mile walk today, dogs all muddy, then topped it off with a few pints in the Red Lion in Hawkshead. Had a good old chin wag with some other holiday peeps in there- can’t beat not working 😬.

Cheers

Spongebob

We went couple of weeks ago and it was an amazing experience.

The guy had head and neck cancer and went through all the treatment.

Now he's doing a new Comedy show about it and it was so uplifting.

One story was that he googled his cancer and it said he had six weeks to live. "I've only just ordered a new settee from John Lewis, it won't be here for 8 weeks, I wonder if they can speed it up? But will she need a three seater? Should I just change it for a chair?"

Well worth seeing if you can, I laughed so hard.

Hi all, I hope you had a good weekend. 

We went up to visit my son and his wife yesterday to lend a hand gardening.

Anyway, I'll cut to the chase, the virtual beers are on me because they're expecting a baby in June. They have a nice scan picture that looks like a cross between a jelly baby and an astronaut. 

Cheers everyone. 

Kev.